So Long Insecurity Group Discussion Week Five!
Hey, Girls! You are doing such a fabulous job with your group discussion. I've especially loved watching you respond to one another. You really are such a tremendous and unique community of women. I'm honored to journey with you here. Let's continue hearing from all those who have been active from the beginning but let's also hear from more of you out there who are watching and reading but haven't really jumped in here and participated. I promise you that when we wrap this thing up, you will be far more satisfied with the experience if you personally invested in it.
We are reaching the halfway point in our journey and have arrived at a place of utmost importance in our pursuit of wholeness. Your assignment this week is based on only one chapter of the book: CHAPTER 9. As you will soon discover, it is not a chapter you just read. It's a chapter you actually do. A chapter you actually pray. Please take it seriously. Everything ahead of us hinges on this experience. It is placed at this point in the journey prior to the prescriptive and practical phase of the book so that the way is cleared and our dignity restored enough to move forward. It will help place us in a posture God can bless with the rich kind of confidence He wants for His people and activate the power we have within us to think and FEEL differently. That's essentially where the remainder of the book heads.
Here are your very simple assignments this week:
1. Do (don't just read but actually do) Chapter Nine. In your comment to this post, simply reflect back on your time with God and share anything specific that you received from it.
2. Go to last Saturday's post (3/6/10) and look at all the verses in the comment section. You will find a wellspring! Pick five Scriptures that speak most powerfully to you right now - five that you feel like you need the most - and write them on the inside of the back cover of the book. (This should be a lot less intimidating than what I asked you to write inside the front cover at the beginning of our journey!)
And that's it for this week! I want the prayer journey to stand by itself and clear the way for mighty works ahead. We have some of our most eye-opening moments in the second half so stay with it, Girls!
Since we only have one chapter this week, this is a great time for many of us to play catch-up!
I am packing this very moment and about to head to Toronto for our first 2010 Living Proof Live. We can't wait to see a God-show in Canada! Come on, Canadian Sisters! We've got plenty of room for you!
I love all of you very much.
posted by Beth @ 6:57 AM
551 Comments
551 Comments:
I did chapter nine on Monday, and I was so blessed. I cried -- quite a bit, but was so encouraged by God and His attention to me. I'm feeling healing. . . I'm speaking His truth to myself.
And I also wanted to say the assignment on Saturday was so timely too. POWER. That's the word I've been hearing from God. I carry that His awesome power in me. Amazing!!
p.s. Beth -- just did the session of Esther where we heard your story about your teeth and mouth. I was ready to cry for the hurt little girl you were until I heard how God has redeemed your BE-A-UUUUtiful mouth. Hallelujah!!!
Umm -- 100th time I've forgotten!
lol
Marlo
32
Married
Indiana
Last week I came to chapter nine. I knew that if I was going to do it right that I needed to pray for at least 30 minutes of alone time to be able to do this. God provided that time Saturday morning. I was home alone. I was so blessed and it took me about 40 minutes to complete. It felt good to write everything down and just look at my sins and then give them to the LORD.
This week when insecurity threatened I was ready to fight back and not give in!!!
Paise to the Father!!!!
Mary
37
Married
Alabama
Hope you don't mind me jumping back, but this article reminded me of the false positives in an earlier chapter:
LONDON - A 41-year-old millionaire businessman who nearly died in a car crash eight years ago is leaving behind his exquisite 16th-century farmhouse and lavish lifestyle to move to a mud hut in Uganda and start a children's charity.
Jon Pedley plans to sell his telecommunications businesses, a $1.5 million Essex farmhouse with a 1-acre garden and his furniture to raise cash for African orphans, the U.K. Daily Mail reported Wednesday.
His charity, Uganda Vision, will send troubled British children to Uganda where they will help locals orphaned by AIDS and poverty.
The self-made tycoon has a troubled past that includes a criminal record, alcoholism and affairs. He says a serious car crash in 2002 in which he almost died led him to find God.
"I've lived an incredibly selfish existence," Pedley, of Finchingfield, Essex, was quoted as saying in the Daily Mail. "I've been convicted of crime, slept rough, been an alcoholic, had affairs, and damaged people's lives including my own. I've always put the pursuit of money in front of everything else."
In college, Pedley said, he began smoking and drinking and stealing from shops and his parents. After leaving school, he received a suspended jail sentence for fraud and theft after scams including selling the furniture at a rented flat, the Daily Mail reported.
Pedley married, continued to drink heavily, cheated on and later divorced his wife.
In 2002, he had been drinking when he fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into a van. He was in a coma for six weeks.
After making a full recovery he said he found religion and gave up alcohol.
'I'm now teetotaler and I try to live my life in a way that pleases God,' he told the Daily Mail.
Inspired by a friend's work in Uganda, he is selling his 16th-century Essex farmhouse and businesses, Empowered Communications and Eme Tech, to fund his charity.
'I've never been more sure about anything in my life,' he said.
Wendy
Ile Bizard, Quebec, Canada
39
Thanks Marlo, you just reminded me that I had to post my name and location. =)
Wish I could go to Toronto to see you! But at least I have the So Long Insecurity simulcast being hosted at my church (Westview Bible Church in Pierrefonds, Quebec) to look forward to. I wish you were coming!
P.S. I don't know why I haven't been able to do chapter 9 yet. I think I'm a little frightened. A little insecure maybe? I'd be asking God to take away all my insecurities but what happens if He does? I'm afraid that without some insecurity that I may become OVER confident and I so don't want that. If I'm too confident I'm afraid that I won't be able to relate with others who are insecure. There is such comfort in knowing you're not alone. I'm just thinking out loud right now...please forgive me...I'm hoping that through everyone's comments I will feel compelled to go ahead and read it without any hesitation.
Beth,
Praying for everyone this weekend! Looking forward to DOING chapter 9!
Joan
Portage, MI
40's
Married
I have been reading the next 2 chapters each Thursday as soon as I finish that day's assignment, and when I read 9 I knew I needed to prepare myself well in order to do it right. We are on spring break this week and have taken our camper to Lake Conroe, and I knew this would be a perfect time to have time alone (it is just my husband and I and he has a hobby called geo caching that takes him away from the trailer for hours at a time while I read). I spent hours re-reading the first 8 chapters to see them again in the light of what I have learned by doing the assignments each week, and I recommend this for anyone who has not already done it, since it drives the lessons even deeper. It made the prayer time that much sweeter. I don't usually like to "read" a prayer, but I found myself best able to whisper it, stopping from time to time to interject "amen!!" or "wow, Lord, that's really me, isn't it" or a few other words of my own. I usually pray for 5 minutes or so several times a day, so this was one of the longest prayer times I have had in a while, and I look forward to good things coming from it, and can't wait to see what the next step is.
Have a great time in Toronto, Beth, I am praying for God to keep His hand on you and your team.
Kerry
50's
married
Texas
I took your advice in the book about taking longer than a half an hour if I could. I actually wrote the prayer out in my journal and said it out loud over a period of 4 days. I get about half an hour to 45 minutes of a morning to spend with God so I let Him dictate each day how far along I got. Then the next day I would read back - out loud - from the beginning of the prayer and wrote more as time allowed. I am walking with my head held higher and my spirit is just soaring. Just wanted to share that writing it out for myself really helped me to read it better if that makes any sense.
Rene
40's
Married
Claremore OK
Before I get started on this week's assignment, I just want to send a shout out to all my Siestas here! I received so many uplifting and encouraging words. Thank you all so much!!! I took your words with me on Monday as I started a new group just for teen girls(aka the fashion police!). I was soo nervous, but then I remembered that I am clothed in strength and dignity! And as for style, all of us siestas come with a designer label- each of us a handmade original designed by the Creator Himself! It's amazing what we can accomplish when we lift one another up..So, as I switch gears to get in touch with my "inner tween" for tonight, I'll praise God again for you all!! Oh yeah, and no pity party tonight.. it's been cancelled ;)
This portion of the prayer brought on the tears and moved me deeply!
Oh Lord continue to treat my heart and soul as you have the past three years where it has been shattered by the loss of my precious daughter. It is YOU alone who brings about the true healing of loss. You are my strength in times of weekness. You absoulutely know the pain of losing your own Son. Thank you Lord that you are alive and present at all times and see my greatest need. You knew what you were doing when you formed me in my mothers womb. Nothing is without purpose...especially painfull loss.
This portion of the book will be read over and over as my hearts cry to my Lord and Savior.
Sandy
Married
50's
Deming, NM
I just finished the book and passed it on to a sister who was waiting for it with baited breath. It was so timely! And on top of that, she gave me "Get Out of that Pit!" in return. I never got to read that one yet. And again, timely. I am walking out of a stronghold that could easily try to rear it's ugly head at any moment. I literally am in the place where I am walking millisecond by millisecond. Even though you wrote these books in the order of your walk, they are actually in reverse for mine. Thank you will never be enough. I love you, Siesta! :)
I have not started this study will be going to Perfect Peace and buying the book this weekend. I am so excited for what God is doing in my life right now and am encouraged by your words. I am inspired by your journey and am on a journey myself. I love to blog and have recently started my own blog. I am amazed everyday at his touch in life...he is incredible. Thank you for all that you do.
Praying for your health and safety on the trip and for the LPL event.
Love you Mama!
Michele
Liverpool, NY
Nise', 49
Married in Michigan
The tears have cleared after spending precious time talking with Him.
1. He wants for me that which I desperately seek and I have come to the ONLY one who can heal me. He understands me like no one else.
2. I asked God to direct my eyes to the verses He wanted me to see this morning:
Psalm 3:8, Psalm 37:5, Philippians 4:13, 2 Timothy 1:17,
but the one that got me laughing and crying at the same time is:
Deuteronomy 2:3 The Message
"You have circled this mountain long enough! Now turn north."
Turning north is my blond brain is up - looking up to Him. He doesn't just want improve me, He wants to fix me! (Yes, I did read chapter 10).
This was such a blessing to me.
I was able to read the entire thing out loud.
I felt the waves of peace flow over me - I was just flooded with His love.
Give thanks to the Lord for He is GOOD.
Sister Lynn
Clyde, MO
Finished session in Here and Now ...There and Then.
Jesus Christ is my Savior!
Thank you for these Bible studies! They have made an amazing difference in my life. God bless all of you!
Have a wonderful trip and so glad you are "back out there" with LPM- May the blessings flow!
I was especially touched by 2 parts of the prayer- my response seems a bit negative, however, the prayer brought to the surface the reality of these issues and will redirect my prayers about the effect of insecurity (fears). I would love for our Lord to heal me and my loved ones in the "land of the living".
When you stated that we are to be divinely infused with dignity and security- a rush of reality hit me why my marriage is such a heartbreak- There is no dignity or security in the relationship and only God can release me or resurrect the situation. My efforts have failed. The truth unveils the infected wound.
I was somewhat "shocked" when on Pg. 166 we were asked: I am so afraid that... all the sudden I was hit with the depth of my fears (insecurities) related to the possibility of never having an anbundant life, never being loved by a healthy husband, the hope of healthy happy adult children who are free from the negative generational issues and my imperfect parenting. I fear missing plain old fun and missing the financial resources to enjoy life and the ability to be generous where my heart tells me to share-
Anyway, I am most insecure about having missed life (I doubt anyone who knows me would imagine such).I am asking God to reveal my purpose and design for my life and to be my supply - my greatest insecurity is that time is passing me by and I've "Missed IT"-
Lots of love and appreciation.
I'm a little behind. I feel like time just slips away! I'm a mommy of two and every time I sit down to read, something happens and I have to go tend to it. Please pray I can get some time alone to catch up on my reading and so I can answer the questions!
Lonna
40's
Albany, OR
In love with who I am married to.
I just posted my responses to week 4's discussion and mentioned at the end that I don't know what Dignity means to me. I then took a look through some of the other blogs and I absolutely loved what "Redeemed" wrote about dignity. It brought tears to my eyes, so thank you Redeemed.
Dear Beth,
I just wanted to say...Thank you. I love you so much for pointing me toward God and His ways so many times. I just finished chapter 8 last night but am looking forward to our assignment in chapter 9.
Big Hugs,
Michelle
This is not an answer to this week's questions but I just had a major "a-ha" moment that this book has helped me come to and I had to share. This book has brought some major insecurities, a few I didn't even realize I had, up to the surface and I am enjoying praying through this and asking God to heal me. I had my moment in reflecting on work. I get so incredibly stressed about my job sometimes that I'm on the brink of meltdown atleast a couple days a week. I find my self working late at night from home and complaining and whining every step of the way. This has caused me to resent my job or secretely wish for a change in situation. It dawned on me today while reflecting on the book that the major works stressors I have are unrealistic expectations I've placed on myself. I place the deadlines and expectations on myself and then try to live up to them and then panic and meltdown when I can't do it. I have blamed this on my job, the work, people at my work when all along it has been me. I'm the one working late at night to meet a deadline that I set for myself. The world doesn't end if I don't get something down in lightening speed but in my mind it does. My insecurities about my position and my place in my company has caused me to set completely unreasonable expectations for myself and my job. My manager has never once asked me to work late, in fact she has said I work too much... it was me myself and I all along being the slave driving boss I had resented for so long.
This may sound paltry in comparison to some of the issues brought forth here but for me, whose work is a major cause of premature grey-ing, it's liberating. Now begins the process of dealing with these work related insecurities and reigning them into reasonable expectations so that I can embrace and enjoy the career God has given me.
Yay! I have been praying that LPM would make its way up to our blessed country! Now, just keep on moving west... :)
Blessings on you!
I read chapter 9 a while back, couldn't wait for God's healing:) Anyway I went into the chapter not knowing what to expect. When I learned that I would be having to read a prayer, I was put off...sorry Beth, just being honest. Anyway, I was at the end of the rope and I knew God had put me there. So I put on a worship song to try to get my attitude in the right place. I just started crying. OK, heart in the right place now.
I went to the prayer. There wasn't one place in the prayer that I couldn't just pour my heart out to God. Everything was from my heart. There was no way I could have expressed myself to God any better. I cried through the whole thing. God's love was so strong towards me. It was a very sweet time between God and I. I didn't "feel" healed when I was done. It wasn't until the following day that I knew God had healed me. Several things came up that normally would have caused an internal melt down. These things didn't bother me I was able to stay level headed and sane. I thanked God with joyfulness in my heart. BTW, I spent an hour with God that day.
I just read a quote from Beth in my daughters' devotion book this morning..."As God's children, we are the recipients of lavish love-a love that motivates us to keep trusting even when we have no idea what God is doing." I certainly leaned on God's love that day and every day, and oh how powerful it really is.
Tamara
Highlands Ranch, CO
30's
Married
Tara
Philippines
30's
Married
My precious book has still not arrived. At this point, I may just have to come back to the blog and reference the weeks' lessons on my own if/when it ever arrives. :-)
Tori
20s
Married- GA
This Book, chapter, everything was so timely, but you know that because God has a purpose for everything! I have finished the book because I felt like it was the right thing to do... the right moment (and, I am passing it to a friend- yes all scribbled, notes and all!). I loved chapter 9, the cleansing and the freedom that went along with it that I have now decided to become secure. Yes, it is a long, difficult journey ahead, but with Him, all things are possible! I am now a secure person, clothed in strength and dignity and no one can take away my security! I was speaking to my husband about my Siesta Mama (which he does not get) and I am so overwhelmed with love and joy for you and this journey and the Lord that I want so much for him to have that passion or for him to want that. Are there any writers that reach to men as you do women? Or am I just "beating a dead horse" here? Be safe in your travels and I pray that many positive things happen through God during your time in Canada!
Though this book and heavily in Chapter 9, God has revealed to me how much pressure I have put on my relationships (particularly friendships) and how I have sought affirmation from people instead of Him. I constantly feel inferior to others and often feel that no one really even wants to be my friend...b/c i'm expecting them to make me feel a certain way (and of course, they don't even know it!). "Help me to stop using a person as my mirror and start seeing myself as You alone see me" has become my daily prayer. Along with these other strengthening verses from Saturday's post:
1. You are my strength and my song...Psalm 118:4
2. May the God of hope fill you with all the joy and peace as you trust in Him Romans 15:13
3. Psalm 112:7-8 She will have no fear of bad news, her heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord, her heart is secure...
Michelle
30's
Married
Arkansas
I'm temporarily 'distracted' from doing our assignments--totally soaking up the love of our new 10 day old granddaughter! I've been reading all the posts and cannot wait to comment on the last two weeks, but have to share that this book IS working in my life already. One of my insecurities has involved my son. I've done a lot of praying in the past 12 years that our relationship would be strengthened and God is so richly working on that this week!! With the birth of his first child, this man is opening his heart like he never has before! What a blessing both of us have received. When he asked me to stay an extra week to help them get their routine down I was flooded with emotion. Thank you, Jesus! Thank you, Beth for helping me open my own eyes and heart to receive this message. I'm moving forward with more confidence and security!
Have a God-filled event this weekend and travel safe!
Bobbie
Reading these comments before starting the Chapter 9 assignment and wanted to respond to LORI. You say that maybe what you are saying and your realization is not a big deal but it IS a very big deal. The pressure that you have attributed to others but really came from your own insecurities, fears and perfectionists tendencies is exactly what is hurting so many of us in all areas of our lives. Thank you for bringing it up and my prayers for you that you will be able to conquer this and have a more abundant, happy, God filled life!
Yes - same question as Tori (the Knights). My husband told me the other day that I was so lucky because the male preachers he hears on tv just don't go into things the way you do. They just preach and tell facts as facts. They don't dive into the deeper issues. Is it just that we don't know who they are or are there none out there?
Man oh Man....I am falling behind in my reading. I guess the fact that I am doing the Esther study on Monday nights, driving to my office on Friday and Tuesday (I work from home) and it takes 1 1/2 hrs to 2 hrs one way depending on LA traffic, husbands birthday on Wednesday night, and doing the Daniel study on my own (almost done..one more week to go...I will miss it...it is great) might have something to do with me feeling some pressure!!! Will try to get caught up this weekend.
Judy
58
Married
CA
Warmest greetings Siesta Mama:)
I wrote out my prayer a week or two ago, and have contemplated on it since. I am so afraid that I will become what I hate: hypocrisy and impurity. Being what I seem is so vitally important to me, I tear up typing it!! My insecurity has many roots in my childhood, just like yours. I didn't realize i had such ugly pride, an insatiable need for affirmation, or that I was that inordinately protecting myself so much. "Real affection cannot be coerced."-that hit home hard. When you ref 2 Tim. 1:7 on p. 166, it reminded me of 1 Peter 3:3-6 in the Amplified. On p. 172 when you ment destiny it reminded me of Esther. On p. 174, you said, "Because of Your mercy, Lord, I am no fool." I thought yes, that's right, and by the grace of God I am what I am. I have no good besides or beyond You, Lord. None righteous, no, not one. He is able to keep me from stumbling and present me faultless! Thank You, Lord for loving me. I love You, because You first loved me...
Blessings to you today:) ((HUGS)) Love in HIM,
katiegfromtennessee
I was(am) blown away by the prayer. It's exactly what I wanted to say. Had such a cleansing time with the Lord (involving many tears). Thank You, Jesus, for restoring my life!
Janet
50
Married
St. Louis
I have to tell you that when I read that chapter (a few weeks ago) God had already Providentially orchestrated my hubby taking all FOUR of my kids out for the afternoon. I had NO idea what was coming in the book, but He did! I was able to be completely alone to pray that prayer and worship out loud. Isn't Jesus just the sweetest? He totally knew I needed that. <3
Oops, forgot my stats:
Gayle
Birmingham, AL
30's
Married
I just discovered the blessing of MY CLOSET! I was trying to think of a place in my new house where I could be alone, and there it was! A secret sanctuary big enough for me and a big snuggly blanket:)
It was such a rich time. I cried a good bit, but felt cleansed and whole in the end. Thank you for writing those words, Beth. I did feel as if they were written just for me.
One of the most significant parts was confessing my sin that keeps me wrapped up in insecurity. God made some things crystal clear to me.
Looking forward to the rest of the book!
Wishing I had started this at the beginning. It sounds like God is moving powerfully in lives with it.
brigetta
37
married
montana
The prayer absolutley touched me; I must be honest I was not able to say it all in one sitting. However, it was on the back of my mind and kept surfacing. When it came time to spending my daily time with God and journalling I felt compelled to write the entire prayer and wrote it out in one sitting in between sobbing, praising Him, layin on my face and finally just beaming with joy!! Knowing I am HIS. Thank you and know this; it won't be the last time I pray that prayer.
This weekend I will revisit the post from Sat. 3/6/10 and will work on my 2nd assignment.
May God shine this weekend in Toronto!
Thank you so much, Beth, for putting that prayer just where you did. I put off praying it until this morning when I was all alone with God. I cried all the way through it. I have wanted to pray these things to God for so long but could never put my feelings into words. It was "my" prayer so I know the Holy Spirit gave you those words. I guess it is every woman's prayer. But most of it, I could've written myself. Having been abused, it is not easy for me to trust anyone and I had often felt growing up that it was all up to me to take care of me. Even after all God's done for me, I realized today that in some situations, I still feel that way. Praise God for His forgiveness! For His mercy and grace. I feel so cleansed and renewed this morning. I'm ready to start walking in the strength, security, and dignity that only my Father provides.
I wish I had joined in on this from the beginning, but alas, I didn't. I don't have the book yet but hope to soon. Maybe I can join in on the next group discussions. :) Love your site!!
1) Highlighted in my book these sentences: "Forgive me for my unbelief. If I realized how valuable I am, my insatiable need for affirmation would be quieted."
OUCH!! I have always believed one of my spiritual gifts is faith, and still do, but realized I have a problem believing what God says about ME, or wouldn't need constant validation from others.
Also, "Where I lost innocence, grant me integrity." Confessed teenage sin a long time ago, believe he forgave me, but still have times when I beat myself up about it.
2) Five scriptures (it was hard to choose only 5!):
Galatians 5:1 "So Christ has really set us free. Now make sure you stay free, and don't get tied up again in slavery to the law." (NLT)
Romans 8:37 "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." (ESV)
Ps 112:7-8 "They do not fear bad news; they confidently trust the LORD to care for them. They are confident and fearless and can face their foes triumphantly." (NLT) (Our church had a "Loving Well" conference this past weekend, so that FOE stood out!!)
Isiah 46:4 "I will be your God throughout your lifetime--until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.' (NLT) (I'm there, under the hair color!!!)
Eph 1:17-19 "That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of Him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of His power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might"(ESV)
Kathy
48
married
Texas
I so desperately want to see the simulcast for this study but have a ministry commitment. Is there any way of seeing it at a different time??
Kim
40's
married
Trenton, Ohio
Beth and all~
1) I have read this prayer several times now and this morning read it aloud to God, underlining the lines that meant so much. As other readers have stated, insecurities I didn't know I had have surfaced. I am a mess really. But what got me the most was the sentence "please deliver me from self-pity and a life of excuses and rationalizations". I am constantly doing that for any action or reaction I live. Even last night on the way home from work I found myself doing that and realized how this is satan's control on my mind. I prayed in the name of Jesus for satans grip to be released from my mind. I will continue to pray that and to pray this prayer.
2) I missed Saturday's assignment but what a joy to read through these verses. My new little pup and I sat down in my DEVO chair (devotional chair) and put away my to do list so we could share in this project. I am overwhelmed and I am not completely through them all. Beth you have the resources, maybe your ministry could put these into a spiral for us all. I envision it on my make-up table where I can flip through a new verse each day...maybe twice a day (one for my car too?). So many to chose from but my top picks so far would be...
Deut 33:12 (my favorite)
Joshua 1:9
Romans 8:37
Prov 31:25
2 Tim 1:9
Neh 4:14b
Gen 50:20
Praying for you in this weekend!
Pamela
Missouri
46, married, blended family
ok so I am a week behind but here are my answers to last weeks questions...Sorry!
1. The part of Chap 7 that hit home with me the most was the way that insecurity had made a fool of us in relationships because I have had some very unhealthy relationships because of my insecurity - trying to seek out my self-worth through others besides God.
2.It is time to deal with my issues of insecurity because:
A.I am sick of losing a battle that as a daughter of The King I should be winning. I want to be able to walk "with strength & dignity"!
B.I am tired of feeeling like I am not enough - Jesus sees me as enough and whatever I lack - HE will provide.
C. I want the ladies whom I have any type of influence over to see that with Jesus we CAN be strong secure women and not give up one bit of our feminity or our dignity!
3. One of the biggest triggers for my insecurity is being questioned about my knowledge, especially by my children. It is so freeing to know that it is perfectly okay and even preferred to be grown up enough in God to say "I don't know, but if I can I will find out" and not lie or feel like a failure because I didn't know.
4.Dignity is walking in the knowledge of WHO and WHAT I am in JESUS!
Julie
Tallassee, AL
Married
45
The Journey Continues ~
Kim Safina
Age 40's
Cayucos,California
Sending you Travel Safety,Health, and Covered in Armor Prayers as you encourage and uplift the ladies in "O" Canada!!!
Discussion Week Five Answers ~
"He gave His life what more could He give;Oh How HE LOVES YOU
Oh How HE LOVES ME
Oh How HE LOVES YOU AND MEEeeeeee"
Lyrics by Kurt Kaiser
This song has been in my heart,mind,and soul since reading chapter 9.
Hallelujah!!! Praising OUR KING!
Be Still....
With "Heaven Bound" blessings,
Kim Safina
http://www.kimsafinathejourneycontinues.blogspot.com
1. I randomly woke up at 1:30am this morning and started praying (or doing) Chapter 9. When I got to the part about seeing myself through God's eyes, I just broke down realizing how much I "grade" myself according to other people's opinions.
2.These 5 touched me:
Isaiah 52:1 (NIV): "Awake, awake, O Zion, clothe yourself with strength."
Joshua 1:9 (NIV): "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."
Isaiah 41:10 (NASB): "Do not fear, for I am with you/Do not look anxiously about you, for I am your God/I will strengthen you/ surely I will help you/surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."
Psalm 27:14: "Wait for the LORD/be strong and take heart/and wait for the LORD."
Jeremiah 32:17: "Ah, Lord GOD! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for You."
Such freedom! I'm LOVING this journey :-)
Safe travel, Mama, thinking and praying for your trip to Toronto and for the Living Proof Live event.
5 verses 5! I am not sure if I am up to picking JUST 5. They all seem to resonate in me. This morning I decided to read just the entries for March 8th and found 27 verses! I will try to whittle it down to five, but I think it is time for a new book of spiral bound notecards, filled with His precious word, that I can look to for encouragement and security. Thank you and thanks to everyone who responded.
I am printing all the assignments out, so I can let my neighbor Alley, read SLI and do the assignments too, she needs to get rid of some baggage she has been carrying for too long. It needs to be left in the station, never to be picked up again. Please pray for her emotional and physical healing and the ability to know that God is her strong tower and she can find strength in the one who loves her like nobody else.
Love You Back,
Andrea
I seem to forget my info. everytime I comment!
Andrea - Montana - 40's - happily married.
Thank you Beth for your prayer. I will write it out and keep several copies with me. This book has been and still is a very hard journey for me. The sisters here have encouraged me. They are strangers and yet they stepped forth and became my intercessors. Thank you ladies.
My own sister has encouraged me by telling me to write out my anger and feelings and I must tell you I didn't realize I was so angry at God. I am also surprised that when I listen to Charles Stanley this week it really was a message pertaining to this terrible way I am feeling. The message is so loud and clear that God is close to everyone of us. I just need to get it into my heart. It takes a long time to travel from my head!
I am still having panick attacks, so I really need to copy your prayer out Beth, with your permission, to carry with me.
I just had to stop and answer the phone. It was my husband telling me the place they supply is closing and going to South Carolina. Please pray that all concerned will be safe and find more work. We have been going through this for nearly 20 years. I should be used to it but everytime it is a slug in the stomach.
Again thank you ladies for your prayers.....Rebecca Canada
I really received from this entire prayer. It was really powerful. I guess the part that stuck out the most was the part about “Where I lost a home, grant me an internal unshakable sense of belonging. I hadn’t really realized in my past that the divorce of my parents at the age of 2 caused this loss. I was thinking it was just the abuse alone God really starting ministering to my heart hear. I had been wondering for so long why I dealt with this sense of abandonment. I knew some of the reasons but He showed it to me more in-depth and on a deeper level. Also, about breaking the cycle with me. I’ve known for some time that was what he was doing in my life. Breaking a lot of generational cycles off my family and off my bloodline.
Another section that God really used was the section about ”single out everything You entrusted to me as a part of my physical and psychological makeup. I need to look in the mirror and see who He has made me to be not what I have made myself out to be.
Thanks Beth this prayer was an amazing reflection and something that I believe will be a great point of contact for me to remind me of when God ministered this to me and started giving me my dignity back.
Amanda Taylor
Richmond, VA
29 at the end of this month
coming up on 6 years this year of marriage
I'm a newbie to the LPM blog. My sweet 13yr.-young son overheard me say in February that I didn't yet have Beth Moore's latest book. Guess what that child surprised his Mama with for Valentine's Day? I've been reading on my own, but I'm jumping into your blog group right where you are. I've been a student of Beth Moore through many studies. This is the 1st time I've ever left a comment on any blog!
Elena
42 yrs.
Married
Three children
Jennifer
30's
Married
Mpls, MN
The prayer was wonderful and hit home in so many places that needed to be touched. I underlined and cried in many places. But what I felt while reading it out loud was absolutely amazing. I felt his hands holding me and showing me haw much He loves me.
I loved the part in the prayer where it says"You are the One who gave it(it being dignity)." WOW! Praise God for all he does for us!
It has been a week since I placed myself on my face and slowly read loud the prayer that changed my heart. I had initially just read it over quickly and then chose a time where I would not be interupted and read aloud, allowing the words to sink in deeply,to touch places within my heart and mind that no one was permitted, and to finally give God the all access pass that I seemed to have withheld.
Even now with the book open to the prayer as I write this blog, my heart swells with joy and comfort for the time spent in His presence, bringing to Him all that I longed to fix but was inaptly able to do on my own.
God is so gracious and tender that He gave me time to let the words resonate within my head, and more importantly to resonate within my soul. He brought freedom for this captive as He has been doing for this past year, with the various studies from our precious Beth.
Thank you Beth for your hand in this help, I could not have done this alone. Thank you for being the author who is open to the Great Author who is still writing chapters in this heart.
Diana
age 44
married
Surrey, BC Canada
I haven't been able to sit in a quiet place yet, but I NEEDED that prayer in chapter 9 right now. Today. Before I face what is going to be really hard tonight. I've recently been engaged and now my fiance is talking about holding the wedding off--maybe calling it off. This is so scary. Much of it has to do with my insecurities that tear at both of us. I've almost read through the prayer in chapter 9 twice, while sitting here at my desk at work (it's a slow day, ok?). I have found the Lord bring SUCH strength and confidence over the past few days in all of this. Much of it was from the verses posted last Saturday. For the first time in a year, I have felt courageous and brave. I don't know if this relationship will end in marriage or not, but I am trusting the Lord to help me be strong and work through this relationship. There was a moment early this week where I felt like saying, "I can't do it. It's too painful. I'm bound to fall apart. I want to just fall apart." At that moment, though, the Lord helped me see that if my reaction would be to fall apart and run, I had my answer right there. Instead, I can stand confidently as the Lord goes before me. If it doesn't work out, it will be because we both sat down, talked through the differences, and made a decision based on wisdom, but not based on fear. I am praying that tonight I'll be able to stand--not because I get affirmation from my fiance--but because I have affirmation from my God. Please pray this will get to my heart not just for the moment but forever! I'm posting this now as a way to say to God that I trust him now, even before the next events happen. Lord, help my unbelief!
OK, I am really sad and frustrated that I have not been able to start this study with all of you yet, even though, I ordered my book through LPM store a week before the book was to be released. First I was told it was due to the snow storms, that it must have been held up in the mail. On March 1st, I was told they were going to re-ship me another book since the first one never arrived, and it is March 11th and I still have not gotten my book!!!! I am soooooooo far behind on getting caught up with you. Guess I will just have to ask for a refund and go buy the book locally and read on my own. Mona in Lewisville
I've been reading ahead because I just can't stop myself. I am so excited about what God is doing with me. I'm loving the journey of reading the book and then reviewing it with your homework assignments. I did the chapter 9 prayer a couple of weeks ago and I just keep coming back to it. It is such a powerful prayer that I think I need to keep praying it regularly once this all ends.
Another scripture that I've continually prayed through this journey is Phillipians 4:13, " I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." It popped up again this morning in your Daniel week 11 video. Wow, it was so powerful. I feel certain that God is working on my selfishness and my insecurity simultaneously. I know I will not be free to live the holy life he has for me if I'm not deliberate about it every single day.
Thank you Beth, for letting God work through you to enlighten me! He is such a wonder. I really love how he works in us. Our God is an awesome God!
Dena
39
Married
Illinois
Dear Anonymous 12:14,
I'm excited about the positive changes in your life, and I'm agreeing with you as you walk toward meeting with your fiance.
Janie
Iowa
50's
Married
Just had to second Siesta Pam's request for a little So Long Insecurity spiral booklet of our verses/prayers. Purse size to carry in times of crisis and daily doses for reminders and inspiration. I've been trying to copy and getting behind. Thank you, thank you!
It was very easy to make this prayer my own!
I am especially aware that I need Him to give me discernment to recognize LIES and not tolerate them at all, regardless of where they originate.
I'm struck by the realization that self-loathing is a "flagrant sin" which I have tolerated far too long.
So very thankful that He has been with me "every moment, even when I felt there was no one to take care of me."
Clinging to the promise that He is always with me and will never leave me orphaned. When everything around me shakes, He is unshakable!
Looking forward to seeing some new fruit, now that those old roots are being dealt with.
Tami
Louisiana
40s, married
This comment has been removed by the author.
Oh girl, this brought out my ugly cry.
"You know how driven I am by fear and how exhausted I am from surrendering to it." I never really realized before this book that so many of my insecurities really are driven by fear. God's word says that He did NOT give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control (2 Tim. 1:7). Lord may your precious gifts become evident in my life!
If I recognized how precious and valuable I am in His site - I wouldn't constantly need others to affirm me in order to feel good enough. That takes SOOOO much pressure off of myself (trying to be perfect) and takes pressure off my relationships (I'm sure my constant pleas for affirmation wear them out too!).
Jesus is perfect in a way that I will NEVER be and there were groups of people that didn't like Him when he walked the earth. Thank you for reminding me that I can't please everyone, and that's ok. Thank you Jesus for being a great example!
God is good!
Sarah
New Mexico
20s
Married
Nelli
20s
Kingsport, TN
Married
1. I did Chapter 9 about a week ago. I cried (even probably got into the "ugly cry" a couple of times) but I felt so encouraged at the end. It helped to get it down on paper. I plan on going back many times to re-visit this prayer.
2. One of my 5 verses I am going to memorize is "You have circled this mountain long enough. Now turn north". Deut. 2:3 NASB. I just loved that!
I am a writer and a public speaker in many facets- In Ministry, as an Educator, and a Historian. My husband teases that I have the gift of turning 100 words into a thousand, but after my moment with the Lord praying through chapter 9 I have only one word... WOW!
This is the first time I've visited this blog (or any blog for that matter). I finished the book yesterday. WOW!! I never really thought about how things in my childhood and teenage years contributed to my insecurity (abuse,both sexual and emotional/verbal, promiscuity) as an adult. God is really working through this book to help me face issues that I either ingored or didn't realize were there. I do find myself seeking the approval of others, trying to control people or situations (namely my husband), and being a total perfectionist (I put way too much pressure on myelf to succeed). In my mind I've got to succeed to be loved or liked. Boy, has reading the book opened my eyes to how warped that is, but it's the way I recieved approval from my mother all my life. God has A LOT of healing to do, and I've got A LOT of letting go to do.
I know my God is an awesome God and I don't have to do anything to have His unconditional love and approval. I praise Him for leading me to this book!
Beth, I have done lots of your studies and they all have had a profound effect on my walk, but this one has definetly touched some issues that I've kept covered from everyone, including myself. Thanks for allowing God to use you to touch the lives of others!
I haven't had the opportunity to pray chapter 9 (homeschooling a five year old), but I await the healing that I know will come! I am "clothed with dignity"!
LeAnne
32
Married mom
Talladega, AL
I've been sitting in chapter 9 for a while. I've prayed the prayer more than once, and each time I pour it out, something new seems to resonate in me.
So I will continue to let the Spirit search me through these words. It's amazing.
We love you too very much!
Becky
Owasso OK
40's
married
Just popping in to say that I am hosting a SLI book club in my home and it is THE sweetest thing I’ve been a part of in a long time! There are seven of us and some weeks we laugh so hard we cry…other weeks we’ve just cried with each other. The Lord has moved powerfully in our times together (every Friday afternoon) and I am certain that when this book club comes to an end, every-single-one of us will come away changed…for the BETTER!
Last week, we took some time to each share about a memory that we have of something we’ve done as a result of insecurity. Oh my…I thought I was going to die laughing!
One of us caused such a scene at her husband’s fancy company Christmas party…making sure everyone knew that she did not trust a certain co-worker of his that appeared to be flirting…she’ll never live it down!
Another one of us actually dropped to her knees (in a skirt!) in a bookstore and began to crawl as fast as she could in order to avoid being spotted by an acquaintance who was wearing exactly the same outfit! Unfortunately, she wasn't fast enough! :(
We all agree, it is high time we get our dignity back!!
Anyway, thank you for writing this book for all of us, and for doing these weekly posts. What a blessing!!!
Beth,
Wish I could be with you in Toronto. I pray for you, your safety, that your voice with hold up and your strength. May God be with you every step of the way and comfort you with his everloving arms. I hope you enjoy Toronto...Rebecca Canada
LORI at 9:28..I was and sometimes still am where you are so my prayers and thoughts are with you. They come from my heart.
REDEEMED at 1:46...Oh sister, I too have been molested, abused and am a perfectionist. I can't trust anyone. Read Beth's prayer in chapter 9. It is so for all of us. Prayers for you.
MAY I third the motion for a spiral book of all the scriptures on Saturday!!!!... Rebecca
My Dear Beth: I've been reading quietly, haven't yet commented & reflecting on what the LORD is doing in my HEART through this book! There's been so much work towards healing and I serve a mighty GOD who HEALS!! Reminds me of the song by Point Of Grace Heal the Wound..."used to pray that You would take this shame away Hide all the evidence of who I've been But it's the memory of The place You brought me from That keeps me on my knees..And even though I'm free..Heal the wound but leave the scar..A reminder of how merciful You are..I am broken, torn apart..Take the pieces of this heart..And heal the wound but leave the scar." Looking forward to what Chapter 9 will bring! You've been such a blessing to me!! Luv ya MUCHO!!
Carmen :o)
Georgia
Wendy (TICKLEDPINK4U),
I just love your honesty in what you wrote: "I don't know why I haven't been able to do chapter 9 yet. I think I'm a little frightened. A little insecure maybe? I'd be asking God to take away all my insecurities but what happens if He does? I'm afraid that without some insecurity that I may become OVER confident and I so don't want that."
I'm with you! The thought of healing is exciting and so terrifying all at the same time. Way back in my early 20s (I'm in my early 40s now), I went through an intense time of counseling, through which God called me to forgive some life-long and very deep hurts. I remember thinking, "I can't! It's all I've ever known! If I forgive and let go of this, what will be left of me?!" It felt like my heart would be a vast, dark void without the pain and the grudge.
But boy was it worth it. When I forgave, I tasted the first bit of freedom ever, and a new level of LIFE that I had never known rushed in to fill my heart.
I realized just a week or so ago that this book has me standing on a very similar precipice, facing the unknown about what life in this heart will be like if I let go of the insecurity that has been my [very bad] friend all my days. And, like you, I wonder what will become of my heart (pride?!) if I am left without my humbling insecurities.
But God has called us to strength and dignity. Certainly He will grant us the grace to walk humbly with Him while being clothed that way. So what do you say we pray for one another, grab hands, and jump off the edge together - right into Jesus' loving arms, which, He promises, are full of life and health and healing and peace. And if we abide with Him in that new place, He promises we will bear fruit that will bless others who have been held by lies too long like we WERE.
Be strong and take heart!
I'm praying for you as I get ready to jump.
Pray for some of your Siestas. The devil must have a reason to keep their books from them so long. Some have yet to get their Feb 2d original shipment or their replacement book. Beth,we know it is not your or LPM's fault.You put the word out there it was up to others to make sure it got to its intended destination. Thanks for all that you do.
I did chapter 9 the other day. There were parts of the prayer that touched me deeply. I have lines and exclamation points all over it! I found myself doing that "snubbing cry"! Since then, at different times during the day I will just state out loud, "I am clothed in His strengeth and crowned with is digniy." I even posted it on my facebook page. I will continue to tell myself these words FOREVER.
Thank you, Beth, for ALL the journies you have helped lead me through over the past 10 or so years! You are truly a Godsend.
Have a blessed weekend in Toronto.
Renee 52 Colordo Springs Married
I think the neatest thing God revealed to me in chapter 9 is that it does not have to be emotional. I guess as I read that prayer I wanted to be in tears, and at parts I was, but I wanted to be MOVED physically. God showed me that for Him to be moving in my life, does not mean that I necessarily have to feel like a brand new woman on the inside. Sometimes I do, but it is more of a change in my mind. I guess we long so much to be rid of our old thinking, habits, and ways that we want to feel different instantly. God is renewing us and completing us daily- and I am so thankful He is helping me remember it is not based on my feelings!
Beth, praying for Toronto, and that you don't have to brush any hair in the airport, or...that you do!
Wendy,
After I prayed the prayer, I too was afraid of my possible new self. I had thought that I wouldn't even know who I was any more for insecurity took control of most my life. If God healed me who would I be? I had delt with this my whole life. I believe it was Satan getting me to question the healing God had for me.
Well I'll tell you from the other side. I'm more confident. I don't question myself anymore. I talk freely to people. I'm not afraid of people. I'm making friends. I'm doing things I NEVER would have done before, for God's glory. I'M FREE! Yes, I'm a very different person. A person I never thought I could be. The person I've always dreamed to be. The person God can now use. All because He healed me!
Don't be afraid to allow God to heal you and enjoy your new freedom in Him. All good things come from God.
Tamara
Giving all these insecurities to the Lord made me feel refreshed by the Holy Spirit.
There is POWER in the name of Jesus!!!!
Praying for you, Beth,the praise team,all of LPM & our Canadian siestas!Thank you for speaking
God's truths to all of us!
Glory to our Most High!
Sorry, I keep forgetting:
Lisa
Peachtree City, GA
40's
married
Can't believe you're on week five already, and I still don't have a book. However..."tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, tomorrow, you're only a day away". Can't wait to see you in Toronto tomorrow and hoping there will be books there for sale!!!!!
Don't know how I'm ever going to sleep tonight!!!!! SO EXCITED! :)
I'll just be one gal, out there, lost in a sea of faces, but Ill be praying for you. You have no idea how God has intersected the timing of this event and my need...only God.
Hugs,
Joy
Thank you. Chapter 9 reminded me in neon lights of the work HE has been doing on me for 20 years. HE waited to bring me into His Kingdom until I was nearing 40. Insecurity was a huge issue that HE addressed immediately. This prayer has confirmed for me that I am HIS daughter, loved unconditionally.
Karlys
La Place, LA
58
Married
Beth, I have to tell you what happened to me today and I haven't even read the prayer yet. The Lord finally got to my heart with the message that HE LOVES ME! There is nothing I can ever do to make Him love me more than He does right now. He loved me in my fallen state enough to die on the Cross!!! He doesn't love the perfect me, He loved the imperfect enough to perfect me with HIS BLOOD!!!
If you still do not have the book you pre-ordered, please email me at blog@lproof.org. Thanks!
This pray was just for me. I am beginning to step up in leadership and the ememy is lying to me and I have been letting him. During this pray time I have given it to God and told Him it is not about me, and realizing it doesn't reflect me.I have given it to God and have been praying for His team rather than my team. So this morning a friend of mine said, "She has to much going on right now to take on something else." And for the first time I was at peace with it knowing He already has the exact team picked out, I need to sit back and let God be God. I am so excited to see how it turns out.
Cassie
20's, Happily married to the man of my dreams
Bishop,Ca
This was such a meaningful chapter to me! As I prayed through it, God brought back painful experiences to my memory and showed me how He had used some of them for His glory and some that I still needed a deeper level of freedom for so that He could turn them around.
Other paragraphs brought me to intercede for some extended family members who are causing tremendous hurt and damage to themselves and others. I can see much insecurity behind their actions, and am grateful to have some additional guidance on how to pray rather than being angry or hurt.
I am going to the bookstore to buy 3 more copies tomorrow - for my Mom, my sister, and my grandmother! Who couldn't use additional freedom and restoration?!
Shannon
30
Married
Alabama
new poster
Joyce
Cyril, Ok
I realize now that insecurity has caused me to turn inwardly_be self-absorbed, being self-conscience, and self-condemnation. Like many of you, I am ask God's forgiveness and trusting Him to empower me with His strength. This is still a process, but I am beginning to recognize insecurity more not just in myself, but others too.
The verse that I liked was Isaiah 41:10 which says...So, do not fear for I am with you for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you.
Lord, I am asking now that You take me mold me and make me the kind of woman I should be. Help me not to be selfish, self-centered , but focus on You and your word. Forgive me for not trusting you more. in Christ, Joyce
Thank you, Beth for helping us see more clearly what God wants in our lives.
A very timley prayer for me in that we just found out my husband of 32 years needs a consultation for possible mouth cancer, or maybe not cancer:} God did lead you in this prayer Beth, your good girlfriend, but really He covered everything! Thank you for your being obedient. I really put to much of my security on relationships and esp. my husband, nothing like a health scare to bring that to light. Going to stay anonymous this time, don't know if anyone would put together who we are but I've not asked hubby if I can share. But thanks for your prayers, God knows our names, and so much more!
Please pray for me, ladies. I am so desirous to have a stronghold removed, and for the first time in a while (with the timing of this book) I am so serious. I find myself slipping back already, and I want so much to be free. God is more than enough. I know this. I just let this thing be more for the last few years. I rarely ask for prayer, but I am asking now. Thank you and God bless.
Kristi
Rogersville, TN
Married
30s
Each chapter I'm blown away just a little more. I couldn't believe how much the prayer in Chapter 9 came straight from my heart.
I can never thank God enough for Beth, these bible studies, the women who led me to them, and most of all how much all of it has changed my life.
1. It was an eye opening experience to think that God does not want me to be insecure. In the past I've only thought of how insecurities made me feel; not that they were holding me back from doing God's will. I will be praying every day to be aware of insecurity, any form of pride or unbelief.
I felt suc a peace after my quite time with God and this prayer. I feel refreshed to continue the book and attend the conference.
I am feeling like God is going to do big things in my life from this more than ever.
I knew I had let insecurities hold me back from serving in the past. I just hadn't realized how much they still are.
2. The verses I picked: Isaiah 40:29-31, Psalm 73:26, Psalms 121:1-3 Romans 12:2, and Phillipians 1:6
I haven't been responding and keeping up with y'all like I had intended, but I'm NOT feeling insecure about it! LOL
I just wanted to jump in here and say that though I've been a slacker, I've already read the whole book through cover to cover, and it has changed MY LIFE. Changed it I tell ya! (Well, I mean God changed it)
I had a situation/setting happen that would have been completely different and I'd have killed myself with the insecurity and well.. I did NOT go there. Not even part way. I was chanting, "clothed in strength and dignity" to myself in the bathroom just in case...
Praise the LORD.
Oh and Um, just to still "participate"...
Sasha,
34
Married,
Washington.
Whoohoo!~ :)
Can hardly wait for friday evening!
Thank you so much for coming up to minister to your northern neighbours.
Back to chapter 9 for tonight.
Safe journey
Love you too, Beth!
As a side note...I find it very interesting that every time I try to write a comment I am somehow "kicked out" so then I just give up. Well, it happened again, and I'm not going to let it lick me! The enemy does not want any kind of powerful transformation in Christ. That's too bad, because Jesus is with me in this and I can feel a new change coming! :)
The words in the prayer were words that I always wanted to say but couldn't voice. I could feel the weight of insecurity lift as I prayed. I know for sure that I will come back to this prayer many times. Even if these thoughts that I write are random, I love to be able to express what is going on my heart. Much love to all the beautiful siestas on this blog! May you all be blessed in this journey!
Heather
38
Married
Bellingham, WA
Boy it never ceases to amaze me that when Satan knows you are working on an issue he puts you in the fire to test your resolve.
As stated in a previous post I have recently gone back to work part-time in a hair salon. This morning as I got ready for work and on the way there I repeatedly reminded myself that in Christ I am clothed in strength and dignity for whatever this day might bring. I arrived feeling strong and courageous ready for anything.
I was not at work a half hour before I was put to the test, however. Because of a misunderstanding on my part and a failure to communicate the process for payment on management’s part I discovered that I had not properly paid for a couple of services I have received since I have been working there. I felt totally humiliated but told myself it was merely a misunderstanding and not intentional on my part and all I had to do was make it right and be done with it.
So the mature adult woman of 59 went to the young stylist of 23 to do just that. As I opened my mouth to explain what had happened and properly pay her, that little girl inside of me that cannot bear to have anyone think badly of her and always has to do what is right in order to feel lovable and acceptable (OK about herself) started to cry like a child, which was even more embarrassing and made me feel even more foolish. The part in the book where Beth talks about when confronted with our insecurities we feel either fearful or tearful so resonated with me because it is where I still find myself so often When I first discovered what had happened my imagination envisioned that I must have been the topic of discussion in the salon. But because of the loss of control over my emotions when I felt wounded and vulnerable, I really did give them something to talk about causing me more shame and humiliation. Thus I was on the vicious cycle of feeling insecure, giving in to the overwhelming emotions I felt, causing me further humiliation, causing me to feel more foolish. Fortunately, I called a halt to the spiral and reasoned that there was nothing I could have done differently to avoid what had happened. I could not know what was not communicated to me and was finally able to let it go. But only after a couple of hours of feeling emotionally overwhelmed and feeling weepy and continually reminding myself I was clothed in strength and dignity even though I did not feel like it. But I must tell you that praying, quoting scripture, or reminding myself that I was clothes in strength and dignity in the midst of feeling so emotionally overwhelmed was the furthest thing from my mind. In the midst of it all I could do was attempt to regain some semblance of control before I could think rationally enough to resume reminding myself whose I am, and how he has me covered in strength and dignity. I remind myself the process of ridding myself of my insecurities has begun and that is what is important, not that I let my emotions get the best of me once again.
Zdenka
59
Divorced
Niceville, FL
Read through the book twice, and each time I have skipped chapter 9.
I have entered into a new phase of my life and for the first time I find myself lost and anxious to the point of paralization.
Do I really know God or just how to serve Him and do things for Him? It is all very confusing to me because of my strick background. I find it all too hard to cope with right now. Major crisis of faith point.
All my "defaults" of coping mechanisms are kicking in. I am never this person - first time in my life. Please pray for me.
Katie
48
Single/Divorced
Dallas, TX
While I was reading Chapter 9 I just had an overwhelming desire to thank the Lord for Beth Moore and her ministry. The Lord has used Beth mightily in my life. Through her God has led me to His Word and I am on my way to healing and wholeness.
Melanie
Married
31
TN
Beth,
I can't thank you enough for the words you wrote under God's direction and inspiration. On the day I read this chapter, I woke up with a cold and called in sick to work. My husband was at work and my kids at their grandparents' house. So, I had the house to myself to read and pray to God.
I cried so much as I read because I truly felt God's hand. He has been so patient with my insecurity. I have lived in constant fear for most of my life (fear of failing, fear of rejection, fear of never being 'enough') and God gave me peace. I realized that I needed to confess my sins of comparing myself to others (which is really just tearing them down to make myself feel better!) and of making everything a competition.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted and that I really can be free from this heavy weight that has constantly been on my heart. Praise the Lord, Thank you!
Melanie
"Melanie is clothed with STRENGTH and DIGNITY" - all because of the grace of an Almighty and Merciful God
http://melscoffeebreak.blogspot.com
I did chapter nine a couple of weeks ago. It was so powerful. I felt God all over it. I cried so much but I felt so much freedom. And the weeks since my battle with insecurity has come so far. God is so good!
Jen
Cincinnati OH
23
Okay, everyone! I am so excited I can hardly stand it!!!! I have not posted on the blog yet, as I have been trying to play catch up on the chapters. I am almost finished with the chapter 8 assignments.
However, this afternoon, I had such a huge breakthrough that I have to share it with someone!
I am part of a book club that meets once a month and this month (today) was my turn to host in my house. In talking with the other ladies, I discovered that 3 out of the 5 of us either couldn't make it, or hadn't read the book. So I decided to postpone the meeting until next month to give us all a chance to read/be able to come. All the ladies said that would be fine to postpone till next month.
After I talked to everyone, though, I was second, third and fourth guessing myself. I even called my husband (twice) to see if I made the right decision. I was majorly obsessing about it - even though it wasn't really a right or wrong decision and didn't really matter in the long run. So, I went to lay down for a few minutes while my kids were napping (yea for naps!) and saw my spiral (yea for spirals!) sitting on my nightstand opened to my March 1st verse:
He is your constant source of stability; he abundantly provides safety and great wisdom; he gives all this to those who fear him. (Isaiah 33:6 NET)
And here is the really cool thing - I realized I was being insecure!!! :)
So I was able to pray and read my spiral and some other verses that I have written down in several notebooks that I have and God gave me peace. :)
So, I am so excited to be taking this journey with all of you and I pray that God will be faithful to deliver us all from our insecurities and make us stable and secure in HIM!!!
Amberley
31
Married (Very Happily)
Pasco, WA
Dear Anonymous (March 11, 2010 6:42)
I am praying for you and understand how you feel. I certainly don't know all of the answers, but I encourage you to tell God all you are feeling. Just pour it out to him. As I prayed through Chapter 9, I just let out everything I had been feeling. All of the pain, anxiety, fear, unbelief, and let God have it. It's too much for you to bear alone, my dear sister. Please just give it to Him and allow Him to heal you.
with love and prayers,
Melanie
I'm packing for Toronto too! 7 of us from Syracuse, NY (4-5 hours) are heading out in the morning. Can't wait for a good Word! Saw you on Life Today this morning and got my "appetizer".
Angela
41
Married 3 kids
Syracuse, NY
Nicole
29
Single
Maryland (via Houston, Texas)
I just had to leave a post because I bought the book on CD Saturday and was done with it by Sunday. I'm mad, ticked, angry and all the stuff in-between. It's Thursday and I have listened to the book twice through already. I just have one question for BM: How did you get inside my head?
Thanks for a great listen/read.
God Bless You and Your Ministry.
I have been reading the book, but didn't know about the blog. I just finished doing the chapter where I prayed through so much stuff in my life. This has been exactly what I have needed.
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Brittney
Pflugerville, TX
20s
Married
1. It hurt, but a good hurt. I cried a lot... I'm starting the process although I know I have a little ways... I haven't prayed like that in a long time and it was definitely needed.
2. "For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory."
Deut. 20:4 NIV
"Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always."
Psalm 105:4
"Seek the LORD and his strength;
seek his presence continually!"
Psalm 105:4 ESV
"My flesh and my heart fail;But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
Psalm 73:26
"You give me your shield of victory; you stoop down to make me great."
2 Sam. 22:36 NIV
i can hardly wait to get going on chapter 9! the last few days, i've felt very led to journal my insecurites and see what i learn...both from them and from God. seriously...it may take an entire spiral! but i've started and will continue to work on it this week. does it count if no one ever sees it???
Wow, what a powerful and moving prayer. Each paragraph seemed to have at least one portion that was directed at me.
Sometimes a little daunting. Sometimes a little painful. But always healing and restoring.
I was able to face some insecurities about myself that I have been much too insecure to admit!
Thank you Beth for being such an amazing, anointed and willing servant of God.
Love you so!
Beth Herring
married,
47
Oak Grove, La.
praying for great travel for you!!
Durant, Ok
40's
Married
I listened to Chapter 9 while driving, but sometime in the next few days, while on Spring Break, I will spend a block of time praying that prayer that God gave to Beth's heart to write for all of us, like so many others have said. It is so awesome (and sad at the same time) how we can all feel like it's our very own prayer.
Beth, I thought Saturday was just so amazing! Thank you so much for that post amd to all who shared verses! I will come back with my 5 favorites.
Just have to share this, too:
Last night was that last session at church to watch the Me, Myself and Lies video.
As we were sharing,and heard that the leader did not have a study to begin next and all were wanting to continue meeting, and then the leader said,
"Beth Moore has a new book.", and all of a sudden I was sharing my excitement with them, and now I will begin leading the group on March 24. I am excited!. . .Please pray for me to lead it with the security that only God can give.
Also, Beth, you have been on my list for Thankful Thursdays and mentioned on my blog many times!
Thank you for all you do!
Dear God, I believe you! I really and honestly do. This is so amazing to me. You have promised me that you will make all my good dreams come true and more. I have the faith and the trust to give up my control entirely to You. What a profound relief. DONT STOP UNTIL YOU'VE MADE A MIRACLE OF ME!!!!!!! I love You :)
Valerie
29
Portland, OR
I woke up last night about 4:30 and could not go back to sleep. I read the prayer chapter outload as I am the only one living here so am free to make noise at night. After reading it I went back to bed and had such a peace. I will read though it at a slower pace and write as I go.I did say outload a lot of things to God that I need to ge out some of them ugly things I'd done years and years ago. At first it was like telling your parents something bad you had done. Well I realize that God already knew all that stuff way before I ever done it even before He created me, and he made me and loves me anyway so just gave it all over to him. He already knows I don't have to be ashamed or afraid to tell Him anything. He just wants us to say it outload to Him and receive his grace and mercy and His amazing love.
It IS good for the heart to be strengthened by grace. Hebrews 13:9
Praise you God
I will do the verses the rest of the week and re read the prayer as well .
Pam
Campbellsburg, In
Single (widow)
50"s
I had my last chemo treatment yesterday. Yippie !!! done with that.. Will start radation in a couple weeks. I am so thankful to have God holding my right hand through this.. Looking forward to walking through this part with Him
Liz
31
married
Atlanta, Georgia
I got up in the middle of the night to do this prayer. All has been quiet! So many things resonated with me in this prayer. One was,"I cannot put a human in charge of my security without setting him or her up for certain failure. Help me to stop using a person as my mirror and start seeing myself as You alone see me." Wow, I didn't even realize that I was doing that until I read it. I do expect others to affirm to me that I am pretty, loved, and wanted. If others, especially my husband, don't show it I don't feel it. I know now that I must stop looking for my reflection in their mirror, but start looking at my reflection in the mirror of God's Word. This book seems to be written for me. I'm constantly amazed that there are others like me out there! I intend to live out my prayer everyday!
I did chapter nine on March 1. I spent time with the Lord in a way I haven't in a long time. It made me realize how exhausting this insecurity thing has been all my life. At 51 it is time to GIVE IT UP! God recently led me to apply for a promotion within our company and then paved the way. I start a new phase of my career on April 12 in a new office surrounded by new people after nearly 21 years in the same office! He is taking me on this new adventure and there is no place in my life for insecurity! Did I mention that I usually HATE CHANGE? Thank you Beth for writing this book -- I know it is just what God wants me to be doing right now!
Nancy
51
Married
Goree, TX
I just read chapter 9 and if I could pick one verse to describe it, it would have to be Isaiah 42:9.
How can I make this whole thing sinks down in my heart deep enough to stick? I'm so afraid that three weeks from now I will put this on a shelf and think it was good but meant for another day.
I'm putting my hand on my heart and not letting any words escape. Lord, please find good soil in me!
Joy
Louisville, KY
20's
I just finished my prayer and I felt that Beth said it much better than I ever could. I did stop at points and elaborate on things in an effort to make it more personal and make it my own. There were even some issues I didn't expect to find but that I truly needed to address, such as my self-centeredness. I really struggle in that area but I never really connected it to my insecurity. I hope to learn more about that. I look forward to seeing how God is going to transform my heart and show me what His intentions were when He created me. I LOVE that I have this book to help me because I want to help my daughter every step of the way on her journey. And not only her, but my boys also. I see seeds of insecurity in their little lives already. It's amazing that they could already (at ages 7 and 4) be having insecurity issues. They have a home where both parents love them, each other and the Lord. We even homeschool, so they haven't been subjected to any peer teasing (except maybe by their oldest brother). My second son does have some learning differences and I've seen lately, that it's causing him to lose confidence in himself. I do intended to keep that from taking root in his precious heart and mind.
I'm looking forward to seeing what God has in store for us as we continue thru this book together.
married w/children
30-something
Marie, VA
Just got my book and jumping into the study. This morning I finished chapter 5. The tears are still flowing from the last page of the chapter....I've sat in the Dr. Office with my 29 year old daughter....I've held her hand through chemotherapy...the words Melissa offered hit my soul with unstoppable emotion...He knows it's scary to be us. He really knows.
I'm working my way through the book and hope to catch up with the group this week.
Brenda
Broken Arrow, OK
I plan on doing chapter 9 during nap time today. And I just have to tell you Beth, that I am speaking at our women's retreat tonight and my topic is Hope in Christ, but also I am weaving throughout my struggle with insecurity. (and my stomach is in knots by the way) Way back when I was asked to speak, I knew that this was what I was supposed to speak about...and then your book came out...Godincidence for sure! I had just finished Me Myself and Lies by Jennifer Rothschild and am now reading your book and also doing Lysa Terkeurst's study Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study girl...God is really working on me! And don't you know this past week in Lysa's book, she says this about insecurity, " It's ok that I'm insecure if it prompts me to rely upon God more fully. When I try to live life only relying on myself, any insecurity seems like a disadvantage. But when I operate with God's love, I ask Him to show me how to use my insecurities to my advantage rather than my disadvantage. My insecurities can actually help me if I allow God to use them to make me more sensitive and discerning towards the insecurities of others." In a way that freed my from the fear of never getting rid of all of this insecurity...because I have to be somewhat insecure so I can rely on God fully...and I also must seek out others who are insecure and help them with what I am learning.
So, thank you for your book and your encouragement. God does have a sense of humor...my biggest insecurities are about my looks and don't you know,this week I have a huge zit on my forehead, I am bloated and the new hair serum I bought yesterday has made my hair not smooth, but greasy! LOL!
If anyone reads this, I would appreciate prayer for the women who will be at Mineral Baptist Church this evening, that hearts will be softened towards eachother as well as God...for those church faces to come off and for God to be glorified through it all!
For such a time as this~
To reinforce the five scriptures I selected after Chapter 9, it helps me if I pick a few hymns with lyrics that parallel the chosen text, i.e., "How Firm a Foundation" and "I Know Whom I Have Believed".
(I really have to focus to do this after yesterday's television broadcast, because I keep hearing Carlton the Elvis Impersonator singing "You Don't Have to Say You Love Me" to Beth)!
Bertie
50's
Married
Houston
Denise, I am praying for you! I still get nervous, too. May God reveal Himself through your precious heart!
I closed myself up in our guest room, just me and God and SLI...and I chewed, pondered and prayed...I layed there upon the bed and reflected at every facet of life hindered by insecurity the prayer of deliverance addressed. I consider this to be the most comprehesive and life changing prayer to be said in faith believing to our God of deliverances. He's my God of deliverance! I thought I was secure until I read this book and prayed this prayer through until evey facet of insecurity was addressed and dealt with at the altar and I believe and I receive a life-changing deliverance from that stronghold that I had not recognized before. This morning in my scripts the LORD gave me this powerful word as a type of benediction: "So is my Word that goes out of My mouth. It will not return to Me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose whereunto I send it." Amen! So be it, LORD Jesus...(Is. 55:11) Talk about a life-changing moment, God bless you "Mama Siesta" for this important work as you partnered with the Holy Spirit and "us" on your mind and heart.
Pam H.
Buena Park, CA
married
60's
Pam, I am so thankful for that last chemo treatment! May God forbid a single cancerous cell to return.
Brenda, you tore at my heart with your words about holding your daughter's hand while she goes through her treatment. Our daughters must be about the same age. I pray that God will command all things concerning her to come back into order and wholeness and that He will reveal Himself to her as Healer. You are so loved here.
Faithful God, we cry out to You. Heal, O Healer!
When I started reading Chapter 9 I was home alone and had the time to DO Chapter 9. I needed that time with God. I felt a release from my insecurities. I just pray that God continues to show me where I am not secure so I won't let it seep back up.
Leanne
20's
Married
Mississippi
I am responding as annonamous on this assignment. I feel as if the Lord spoke to me so much through chapter 9 during the section about loss. 15 years ago I had an abortion. I am walking with the Lord now and God has chose to bless me so richly with a beautiful family. But I had never really felt as if I deserved the right to morn that loss. Yesterday when I got to that part I felt as if the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart that it was okay to morn. We had a rich time. I feel as if God is bringing healing to this part of my life. Thank you so much.
I'm new to this blog, and just had to share what happened when I came to chapter 9. I was visiting a friend out of state (and out of my time zone) and threw SLI into my suitcase at the last minute. I read a chapter every night because I wasn't quite ready to go to sleep. When I came to this chapter, I was able to cry/pray through the entire thing in a room alone with the door shut, with everyone else in the house dead asleep! No dogs, no kids, no hubby to worry about. God is so good! I was able to get to the bottom of what drives me to seek attention all of the time. I was the oldest of many, and I was expected to be responsible for my younger siblings. My mom didn't have the emotional time or energy to give me and I have spent a lifetime trying to to make up for that. WOW!
This trip was not planned, just spur of the moment (I thought). But the real purpose was for me to start the healing process for this gaping hole in my childhood. How great is our God!!!?
Carol
51
Married
Arizona
Cindy Childers
Newton Tony, England
30's
Oh Beth I just love you. Thank you for being bold in your love for Christ and persistent in your pursuit of Him... that you've dared to go to the ends of the earth and LIFE with Him to see how remarkable He is and to share what beautiful things you've learned about our Father. You are a testimony of His love and an ENCOURAGER to us girls that also live to seek His face and rest in His presence!
1. This week two things have just dug in deep with me. The first one is something that I just can't get out of my mind from last week. You said on page 159, "We are wise to note that all people have God-given dignity even if they don't yet have eternal life through Jesus Christ." I have just had that statement tugging on my heart constantly. I think it has just about set me free! I have often struggled with this issue of "Wow, I'm saved and I'm working out my salvation daily and trying to live a life that is pleasing to our Lord and gosh, that person's not a Christian, that must be why they act so ugly or why they hurt me and others - whether they mean to or not." HOW SELF-RIGHTEOUS! As if my faith in Christ makes me any better than the lost. No, it just makes me BLESSED!!!
But you know what, that statement, caused me to realize how wonderful, how special, how indispensable EACH person that God created is to Him. And that by in His perfect love, He created each one of us, that we too should accept with gratefulness the ability and gift and pleasure of loving everybody - both the saved and the lost.
The second piece that really moved me this week is when you wrote (pg 172) "You (God) mean to increase the praise that comes to You because of my life." Are we the luckiest, and blessed saved people on this earth or what!?! I just love that our lives can cause ourselves and others to praise you more because of what they see you doing in our lives. Oh HALLELUJAH to that!! I love you so much LORD!
nearly 30's
Kansas
Well first off I have to confess that I was steaming through this book like a lady who has just had a four shot latte. Beth your comments last week about just reading the book but coming up empty struck home. So I back tracked to the chapter we were on and stopped reading ahead. It has made such a difference :O)
I can feel the almighty hand of God working in my life! I haven't laughed this hard at work or well in life in almost ten years! At first I thought just how much coffee have I been drinking lately. But then about Wednesday of this week I realized that God was moving in my life in depths I can not begin to explain. I'm not scared to just be me. I love being who he has made me to be! I'm not afraid to stand firm, I'm not afraid that people won't like me because I know God LOVES ME!! I can laugh and be giddy and enjoy this life that God has given me!
Okay onto the homework. Well I read this chapter and on Feb 26th. I wrote the date in the book. Praise the Lord that I've come back and read it again. BECAUSE I CAN SEE THAT GOD IS ANSWERING MY PRAYERS! I was reading it just this morning before I got ready for my day. And the words I was praying were just coming to life before my eyes. The Holy Spirit was right there with me going, "see...see...see God does hear you sweet heart! He loves you and He wants to HEAL YOU!! Look at what he has already been setting you free from!"
Thank you God!! Truly truly thank you!!
These sentences from Ch. 9 made a huge impact on me: "Help me to realize that it's pointless to demand that others love me more or love me better. Real affection cannot be coerced. I cannot put a human in charge of my security without setting him or her up for certain failure. Help me to stop using a person as my mirror and start seeing myself as You alone see me." WOW! I want to be in that place of totally resting in the security that God's love is all I need. And then the love I get from people is just overflow. Seems like I remember something along those lines from "Breaking Free" the week that we studied the woman at the well. Amazing stuff.
Laurie
49
Married
Beaconsfield, QC
Denise, I loved what you said about the quote from the author - about it being ok to be insecure, if you lean on God...because I have this question that keeps coming back into my mind: Is insecurity sinful? I have answered: Yes, when I am not remembering that I am who HE says I am.
Just in case any of you need a good laugh this morning, I thought I would share what just happened to me. (I'll post my homework later, but just had to share this.)
Okay, so you know we've been talking about the verse that reminds us that we are clothed in strength and dignity? Well I just had a real-life application of that verse...
My husband was leaving for an important meeting -- on his way to sign the paperwork for a really exciting new job venture. I noticed him walking through the back yard, which didn't make sense. He should have already been gone. Then he came back inside and told me that his car was stuck in the mud (in our yard) and he would have to take my car instead. The only problem with that is he has quite a drive to get to this meeting, will be there most of the day, and then has to drive home. I am home with our two kids, and the car seats are in my car.
Not wanting to be stranded all day with a stuck car and two children, I had to think fast. My husband joked, "You wanna put on your shoes and come outside and push?" He laughed.
I thought, "What the heck." I put on my shoes, pulled up my jeans as high as I could (can't somebody please design a pair of jeans that doesn't slide down in the back???) and went outside.
There were muddy ruts everywhere. My man was seriously stuck, ladies. He parks on an incline, which meant that if I really was going to push him, I not only had to push the weight of the car, but had to push it UPHILL. Okay, Honey, here goes nothing.
Yall, I swear, I pushed that car out of the mud with my own hands! He got about half way out, and then put on the brakes, stopping the car, to tell me he couldn't believe I actually pushed him out of the mud. NOOOOOO! Don't stop! You'll get stuck again. I had to get him to focus, take his foot off the brake, and then I pushed again until he and his stuck car were out of the yard and onto the driveway.
She is CLOTHED with STRENGTH and dignity. Or for the 21st century, "Honey, will you put on your shoes (clothed) and push my car out of the mud? (Strength.)
Now that, my friends, is real-life application.
Hope you enjoy hearing about my morning as much as I enjoyed sharing with you all.
Much love,
Christy
Age: 35
Macon, GA
"Sow for yourselves righteousness,
reap the fruit of unfailing love,
and break up your unplowed ground;
for it is time to seek the Lord,
until he comes
and showers righteousness on you."
(Hosea 10:12)
The Lord has showed me this morning that we must do our part so that the Lord can do his. We must break up the "unplowed ground." This means that we are responsible to prepare the soil of our hearts so that the seed that is planted might bear much fruit. The Lord is the Lord of the harvest, but he cannot produce a harvest in ground is not broken of its hardness.
So, the questions the Lord has been asking me are, "What roots do you need to dig up? Will you break up that hard ground so that my Spirit can come in and do his work in your heart?" For me, the root sins are unbelief and pride. My insecurity comes from a root of unbelief.
I encourage you to consider the truth that the Lord's word cannot produce fruit in ground that is not broken up and where the thorns are not removed. This is the hard work of the workmen. But if we do our part, the Lord will surely come and shower righteousness on us. He will care for us like a farmer cares for his crops. He will see to it that our needs are met. And in due time, he will bring about a harvest of righteousness and peace - far beyond anything we could ask or imagine. I don't know about you, but I think the hard work MUST be worth it!
Thanks Beth I am so thankful too for all the support my God has put around me. He shows up in the most amazing ways.
Brenda, You daughter is in my prayers as well.
Pam Houston, That verse Is. 55:11 does wonders to my heart too. I just love it. It resonated with me a few weeks ago and I just keep going back to it.I have been reading a book by Don Gossett and E.W.Kenyon called the Power of your Words and he talks about that very thing a lot in the book. A little section says
May your confidence in the Word be strengthened to make you know "that no Word from God is void of power" or can go by default. There isn't power in all the universe to void one statement of the fact in this Word. He said "I watch over my Word to perform it" And again Whosoever believeth on Him shall not be put to shame." Your confidence is in that unbroken, living Word, and you hold fast to your confession in the face of every assault of the enemy. Amen !! So be it Lord Jesus.
One last thing there is a young lady at work, her sister ( 19 yrs old) is getting ready to have surgery, a hysterectomy next week her name is Savanah, cancer in her uterus, there is lots of concern with some other health issues as well. I told her I would pray for her sister and ask you to join me in lifting up this young lady.,
I love this blog
I am a secure in the Lord Jesus Christ
Pam
Campbellsburg, In.
Single ( widow)
50's
I just finished Chapter 9 and let me just say WOW, what an awesome time the Lord and I spent together this morning. Through tears I confessed my unbelief in His power and His love for me. If I only realized how valuable I am, my insatiable need for affirmation from the world would be quieted. I cannot continue to put humans in charge of my security without setting them up for certain failure. Lord, help me to stop using others as a mirror and start seeing myself as Christ sees me. Grant me the power to claim back my dignity (that I surrendered) and hang onto it through your might, your strength and your power.
I have come to a realization since DOING my homework yesterday. I've known that God has forgiven me...washed away my sins...but I waver when it comes to my husband. So afraid that one day he will become fed up with the person I was, (our relationship started off with drama to say the least!) and decide that even though he said he forgave me, he really doesn't. Then he'll leave me and I'll be alone and I'll deserve to be alone. We had a long talk last night about insecurities and my sadness over past mistakes and my fears that he will hate me one day...again he tells me he forgave me and that I need to move on and get strong. This time, I hear God telling me, "stop stewing on this. I forgive you, he forgives you and ultimately I hold your marriage. I will restore any fissures. It is my will for this marriage to last." I have been an open book with my husband, to the point of detriment, (every time I feel a twinge I confess it to him as if I need his salvation) and I have finally realized that I need to be an open book only to my Father in heaven. If I will "call" Him 10 times a day to tell him when I feel like running away from my children, crying, screaming, etc. I will A) get the forgiveness and restoration that I truly cannot get from my husband, (though he would give it to me if it were humanly possible!) and B) not stress my poor husband out with fleeting worries and feelings. My insecurities have made me a walking time bomb and my family picks up the pieces. NOT ANYMORE! God will pick up the pieces and present me new and clean to Himself and to those who love me here on earth. I have the feeling my prayer life is going to get a whole lot busier! LOL
I've been reading the book, and I have a question. What does a secure woman look like? What characteristics does she have that are different from a woman who has insecurity?
Goldilocks
43
single
Missouri
Becky
Brentwood TN
40's
Married
What a chapter. I have to admit I'm not interest in just 'reading' this myself, I need/want to ditch insecurity for good. BUT being a perosn of fear I'm a littel shakey on this. I've never associated fear with insecurity before. daugh!
I'm glad to learn it's God's will for me to have my dignity and security restored, so I'm cashing in on that request.
Did my private time with God on this as suggested...was good, Not good was learning that insecurity will be on me again in my life, BUT now I have the tool to deal with it.
BETH--doing this, I'm afraid I will be hit with even more fear and anxioty as I deal with all of this. I'm just coming off a season of mjr fear/anxioty issue I'm afraid I am asking for more here, this has me distracted. Oh I want freedom from my insecurities, I want FREEDOM period. Fear has me gripped around the throat to much to go diggin' thru the trash to get to the roots of this garbage, I'm afraid of what's back there. BUT I have confessed to the LORD these issues and the sin of fear and anxity not letting Him be bigger than my fear, for working so hard to control it, I know better than that! I must let Him control it. I had to confess and ask forgivness for my self-absorption, self-loathing, and pride, for my small faith, unbleif and not trusting the LORD. Oooach! Again,I know better than that. What in the World have I let in? SIN. The evil ones tricks...not trusing in GOD alone, unbelief, Insecurity, fear, anxioty and lack of faith. Now is that a good receipe for garbage soup or what?
I'm so thatnkful that I have joined this blog of siestas, y'all have been very helful,lets me know I'm not alone in this battle. I'm thankful for you Beth, for being a Bible teacher that is real, and teaches me about my Jesus. Thank you sweetie.
The Sat. of Bible verses whoa baaaaby! that was for me, I needed that soooo much, I was sitting here at my computer with pen in hand. oh that was good!
Everybody, I'm hangin' in there with y'all.
WOW! That is the only words I have for chapter 9. What an amazing prayer. I cried so much at times I couldn't read but at the same time I kept plugging through it because I wanted to give it all to God and be set free. I've never read anything so dead on. Beth that WAS God not you, but you knew that :)
God has been speaking "confidence" to me in the past year but I couldn't figure out why I didn't have it anymore. I've been in a terrible pit. I kept trying to memorize scripture about having confidence but I wasn't connecting with it. Little did I know the root was insecurity and I have to deal with that first.
I am my own worst enemy. My battle is in my mind and right before I was going to read chapter 9 last night I watched you Beth on Life Today talking about "A Beautiful Mind". Want to talk about a prompt before my reading, wow! I think I need to get my hands on that series to continue the work of de-junking my mind.
Siestas, we can be confident without being perfect. We can live in victory, not perfection, to quote Beth. She nailed it on the head during the program when she said we need to constantly be in prayer and in His Word! God has been vigorously prompting me to do this for the past year or more, and I know he has, and I've been trying in little bits when I have time. You know the demands, a husband, 3 kids, etc. Well that's not working for me. God has confirmed this to me more times then I can count these past few weeks. I need to be armed! Thank you for the 3/6/10 post. Memorize Scripture Siestas and if you have trouble at least meditate on them! (also Beth's words, grin)
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.
You need to persevere so that when
you have done the will of God,
you will receive what he has promised. Hebrews 10:35-36
Andrea
33
Married
Virginia
I spent a huge portion of my marriage trying to coerce real affection from my spouse. I've spent years trying to do or be who he wanted, instead of just being who God made me to be. NO matter what I have tried it never worked. You can't make someone love you. You can't demand their affections. I changed so much about myself I lost track of who I really am. Through this study I am finding my way back to the woman God made me to be a woman clothed in strength and dignity.
Dora
Tennesee
First off, I pray for a special blessing for anonymous at 9:19 am on 3/12.
I came into Chapter 9 somewhat in a rush. Today 3/12, was my last quiet day before my college-age kids come home for Spring Break. I realized that if I needed to read aloud, I needed to get it done before they were here. (Otherwise, they may think Mom has lost it talking to herself...LOL)
I felt rushed and feared I wouldn't feel the impact of the prayer. But God is ever-faithful. From the moment I started praying, I felt God speaking directly to me. So with tears in my eyes, God met me where I was.
Amazing love, how can it be??
Help me Lord, to stop using people as my mirror and start seeing myself as YOU ALONE see me.
Kim
40's
married
Trenton, OH
FROM IN SECURE to SECURE IN CHRIST!!!! At our group on Monday nights, we began with chapter one and the awareness that we are IN SECURE...and now we are becoming SECURE IN Christ. Also, in our group of 10 women, the one thing we all have in common is a desire to be SECURE IN our IDENTITY in Christ. God Bless you Beth, and thank you for the book!!
Beth Craig
California
Hi Beth,
I know you won't see this because you are in Toronto, but I saw you on Life Today talking about A Beautiful Mind.
I am stuck. Have been forever, as long as I can remember. You are so right. Everyday, every circumstance, I feel like I am going crazy. I feel like I can't handle any more. I feel like if I don't calm down I will explode and no one will be able to put me back together again.
I fear everything. I fear life itself. After counselling for abuse (it started when I was 3, the abuse)I was told I was living off high anxiety. High School was a nightmare. I was ugly and scared. But worse yet is the everyday NOW. Will your audio on A Beautiful Mind be available in book form? It is all I can afford.
When I think I am getting better I am attacked again and again. I know this sounds like garble but I need the enemy to step away from me. Just cause I might die...Rebecca
40's and married
I am thankful for the reminder that I do not need to hide ANYTHING from God, that He is the Ultimate Safe Place. He will treaat my confidences with exactly the right amount of compassion and understanding. His love for me and compassion for me never changes, no matter the yuck I find myself in. AND He is the one who is able to fix every bit of it.
To Anonymous march 11, 5:52PM
I am praying for you right now!
Don't you give up! The prize is
yet to be had! You WILL receive
freedom! The enemy will try to
do everything to keep you from it,
but don't you stop calling out to
God, moment by moment. He hears
you, and He is faithful and WILL
finish what He has started in you.
I've been there, done that! You post as often as you need for us
to lift you up! God hears our cries, and He longs for us to be
free!
Eph 3:16-20
I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you, My
dear sister, with POWER through His
Spirit in your inner being, so that
Christ may dwell in your heart through faith. And I pray that you,
being rooted and established in love, may have POWER, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to KNOW this love that surpasses knowledge-that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness(and freedom) of God.
Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably MORE THAN ALL WE ASK OR IMAGINE, ACCORDING TO HIS POWER THAT IS AT WORK IN YOU, TO HIM BE GLORY IN YOU AND IN CHRIST JESUS,
throughout ALL generations, for ever and ever! Amen!
You hold on sister! He's got you
covered! And don't you forget it!
HE WILL SET YOU FREE! Live in it!
You have His power in you!
Love to you, siesta,
Lisa
Beth, I just "did" Chapter 9, and all I can say is "wow". So much of your prayer expressed exactly what I needed to express for myself, especially pg. 167 -- how God knows us and all of our complexities and how I can't even figure myself out much of the time and how much I need His insight.
As I prayed through the part on 166 about God searching the deepest recesses of my heart, I added "Lord, I don't even understand why I struggle with the things in the deepest recesses of my heart." And then I heard Him whisper, "The enemy... the enemy..."
At another point He met me at a point of deepest need and whispered, "I love you, Cheryl."
I'm still crying when I think of how He ministers to us and loves us, and I'm also blown away at how He gave you the words that so accurately expressed the cries of my heart. All of the prayer, of course, did not apply directly to me, but I know those parts hit the nail on the head for other women. God is amazing, and I praise Him for how He gave you these words to share with us! Thank you!!
Forgot to give my info
Cheryl
Fifties
Married
KS
Heather
Thirties
Euless, TX
Divorced
1. Do (don't just read but actually do) Chapter Nine. In your comment to this post, simply reflect back on your time with God and share anything specific that you received from it.
I read chapter nine awhile ago and the gifts that I have received from God have been 100 fold of what I expected. I have grown as a writer and a communicator. My spiritual life has grown and I can feel the energy around me. I have the opportunity to explore who I am and my worth. It has improved those relationships that have been serving me and have helped me end relationships that have been depriving me of God's loving energy and life. The timing of these discussions are a gift from God.
I will be selecting my 5, but there's one I want to share: 29 Jeremiah 11
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the lord.
Denise
Albuquerque, NM
50's
Married
Beth and LPM staff my prayers go with you as you travel and minister in Toronto. May Jesus be glorified and may His healing power infuse and empower those who attend and those who serve. I haven't yet read Chapter 9, but I will. At the same time that I am engaging in this on-line study with my fellow Siestas, I am also watching you, Beth, on Life Today with James and Betty Robison this week and going through your teaching DVD series "A Beautiful Mind". So many of the scenarios you are covering in your newest book have also been expounded on in these teachings. I highly recommend anyone who is seeking more of Jesus' loving embrace and healing power to get this series. I have so many areas of brokenness that Jesus is restoring, I didn't want to keep His restoration to myself, because we are the Body of Christ to the world, "when I am weak, then He is strong." Be en"courage"d and know He desires to give us a hope and a future, and God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of POWER and of LOVE and a SOUND MIND. (emphasis mine) We are MORE THAN CONQUERORS (and we will conquer the strongholds of the lies we have known and replace them with the truth of God's Holy Word!
Roll Call
Evelyn
Virginia Beach, VA
52
single
(this is my 1st post, but have been lurking.)
Erika
30s
Married
Like a latent allergy that exposes itself after a physical trauma, all my insecurities were full blown after I experienced a great betrayal 4 1/2 years ago. I came to the realization today that God and I have dealt with many facets of my insecurity and He has healed many of them (i.e., perfectionsim, fear) in these past years.
Did I peg the overarching theme as insecurity? Not until I started reading this book. When I prayed through the prayer in Chapter 9, I was able to praise God for much of the healing and setting free He has already done. Still, if there was any insecurity left, anything that I was holding to, I believe God uprooted it.
Since I write a lot on here, I decided to make a blog to share more thoughts, if anyone is interested... I see a few of you have posted yours on here, and I have been able to visit some of those and enjoy reading your stories so much!
My blog is www.2Timothy1.wordpress.com
Feel free to leave your insights on there, too, if you want! :)
What a wonderful prayer time with the Lord. He is so good isn't He!!! It is amazing to me that I have never really taken my insecurities to God in prayer. I just always assumed they would be a part of me. He met me this morning and I felt lighter in my spirit today. I also looked at other women in a different light.
Thanks Beth for inviting me into this time with my Savior.
I have a question and am putting it at the top of my comments, hoping you'll see it. How does one "get over" or "get out of" or deal with financial insecurity? I can deal with/handle/tame/get rid of all other types of insecurities (physical, mental, emotional, etc), but just can't seem to clear the financial hurdle. Can you address this at some point?
I did this chapter over the weekend when I carved out some blessed quiet time, and just lived in it as much as I could for several days. Tuesday, we ran errands - paying one overdue bill that we had not had money for, and still really didn't have, but had a cutoff notice, so we robbed Peter to pay Paul. I was feeling really down, and then, your words, yelled into my brain: "It is God's will for you to have your dignity and security restored."
I immediately thanked God for that reminder, and asked Him to help me believe it.
"Neither God nor you have anything to gain by your persistent insecurity." So true, so powerful.
Thank you for this incredible chapter, and for the precious, powerful, life-changing prayer. I'll pray it often.
I started reading chapter 9 before I realized there was an assignment. When I saw what I was going to have to do (get really REAL with God) I stopped. I panicked. The book sat untouched for 4 days. I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of not being able to mean or believe everything that the words in the prayer stated. I was afraid that maybe I was the one person who couldn't be delivered from insecurity.
Every day that went by I felt a tug at my heart to get quiet with God and do this thing. Every day I pushed it aside out of fear or insecurity. Finally, today as my daughter napped I said, "Ok, God - We are going to do this and I really need you to reveal some things to me." Well, He did. I cried and was just so encouraged by this prayer. By the way the words seemed meant just for me. I felt peaceful and safe in God's loving arms as we worked through some hard issues together. I am happy to say that God has restored my dignity!!! I am prayerful that I can hang on to it with God.
Jen
26
Married
Missouri
I cannot get through the entire prayer yet. Every time I start, the tears well up so much I cannot see and by the time they stop falling my eyes are nearly swollen shut. There is such a longing in my heart to be rid of my insecurity. My husband of 7 years has cheated on me with 6 different women and his addiction to pornography is still lingering. Only God can raise me out of this. I am so stuck in fear and insecurity. I want my God-given dignity back! I want my savior and Lord's love to be what matters most to me. I want to rest in the security only He can provide. Please heal me Jesus.
Aimee
37
Married
South Carolina
well, I haven't done ch 9 yet but had such a fall out today here in my house due to my insecurity that I just want to quit. I hate the trap. I hate the damage. Horrible. Please pray guys. I know it will take quite a bit to get the chapter done.
thanks for your lifting me up.
Lisa
Cogan Station, PA
married in my 50s
Welcome to Toronto Beth!
I am so excited take part in the worship here in Toronto!! Yay! thanks for coming...We've watched your videos in women's bible studies for at least 4 yrs and now we get to be a part of the 'before and after'!! (Please don't mind our crazy hair...it's rainy this wknd and no amount of hairspray will help!)
Lily Taylor from RAC in Toronto!
Just finished praying the prayer out loud about 30 minutes ago. It is so cool because God is showing me (through this book) how far we have already come. I see so much of myself in these pages - but a lot of it is my former self/my younger self. I remember those painful times well, but God has faithfully delivered me from so many of those insecurities. So this book has, in many ways, fueled in me a deeper appreciation for God's saving work in my life, as well as greater compassion for those still in the fight against insecurity.
My prayer consisted of much time asking God to shine lights on areas of insecurity where I still struggle, even unaware. I know of one particular area where I still struggle, and I offered that to Him as well.
I also broke down and cried with thanksgiving for the people God has used to demonstrate His love to me. People that saw me as He sees me - even before I was able to see myself through His eyes... My husband: he really loves me. Not that he's perfect, but he treats me the way I deserve to be treated. I can't believe I ever accepted less. And you, Beth, although we've never met, I cry my eyes out every time I pray for you. You have no idea the extent to which God has used your ministry in my life. God used you to turn me from a christian into a disciple. He and I have our own private way of studying together each day (apart from your studies and your books) but there are so many times you are sitting there in our circle. I can't wait to see you get your crowns and lay them at His feet. You are living proof, and now, so am I.
Love you and your daughters (and my siestas) <3
I just finished reading a bunch of the verses from March6th. I posted about an hour ago that I was so discouraged and hated the insecurity trap. I got to a post that anonymous quoted in Deut. 2:3..."you have circled this mountain here loong enough...now turn north..." heading on out of this desert land, circling around the same old stuff and heading north, outta here from insecurity to freedom!!!
Lisa again
from cogan Station pa
married in my 50's
Barely in my 20s, married.
(Warning, this is long, so if you can't post it, that's fine... I can't seem to condense my answer to the question from week 5...)
I want to share what God has shown me through his word as I (have to say, begrudgingly) went back over the verses from March 6. One that I wrote down, that just struck me at the time was Isaiah 41:13.
"For I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear, I will help you.'"
I didn't think much of it. I wrote it down on a hot pink index card. Then as I was confessing the sins of unbelief and pride, I began to pray over my four scriptures. I prayed 2 Cor 10:3-5 and then the one above.
As I was praying, instantly a vision/picture (definitely not hokey as some might think when I say vision) returned to my mind which I had several years ago when I preached/taught/spoke for the first time. The best way I could describe how I felt that first time I spoke was that God had led me down a dark, lonely dirt road, holding my hand. Like a parent with a child. I can see it in my mind. I was terrified, but he was with me, so I was alright.
Then just a couple days before I was supposed to speak, it was as if the Lord's presence left me. I felt very alone. I couldn't sense him. I had no choice but to go ahead and teach, so I did it. It was the absolute worst thing I have ever done in my life. I returned to my bunk (it was on a mission trip) and covered myself in shame and swore, "I will never do this again in my life. Never again will I do this."
About a year later I was in a position to speak again, and I did it - begrudgingly. The next few times I was asked I said, "No. Not gonna do it." I threw my fist up at God. I decided the fear and anxiety I experienced wasn't worth the blessing of obedience. Plus, I'm a woman! Women don't teach, was my logic. "God you should have made me a man if that's what you wanted from me."
I haven't spoken since then, although I feel a burning fire in my bones. I used to think that this compulsion to speak was presumption, until I starting dealing with my unbelief where I realized that sometimes the enemy disguises as an angel of light and we call it "presumption" or humility ("I could never do that." "It would be prideful to think God called me to teach.") but it is really just unbelief in disguise.
All that to say that as I was praying this verse, one of my greatest insecurities (fear) is being delt with at its root. What I sensed God saying to me as I prayed this verse is that he DOES and WILL hold my hand as I preach, should the opportunity come to me again. I do not need to fear (this is one of my greatest insecurities - speaking in front of people) for the Lord will help me. He holds my hand. He never leaves me, although I may not feel him. It's faith, not feeling that matters.
Lord, I believe, so help my unbelief. And as a mentor told me, "even the tinest mustard seed of belief is enough." The Lord's grace is enough for us.
He holds our hand, even as we walk the darkest and loneliest dirt paths of our life. This is testimony to the power of God's word and how He can use his word to speak to us. I'm not going to excuse away the voice of the Spirit as I so often do. "Aw, that was just in my own head." Or, "I just made that up. Heck, I've been reading scripture all morning, of course it might pop into my head." No, these prompts from out of the blue (through is Word) are the Spirit.
I’m not going to go about looking for opportunities to speak. But so help me God, should I ever be asked again, my prayer is that I would have the courage to be obedient.
What an encouraging assignment. Feeling bogged down with pressures from every angle those scriptures were such a blessed relief and precious reminder that God is always my strength and I do not have to fear. From chapter 9 the prayer opened my eyes and showed me that I do want to be that kind of woman that a little girl could follow to dignity and security. I have given my dignity away to what others think using them as my mirror instead of what God knows me to be. In situations this week I have caught myself in insecurity and have stopped in mid sentence or actions as the Holy Spirit has been speaking and reminding me that is insecurity. It feels really good to be Free :)
Kim
North Carolina
Married
40
My chapter nine experience was so peaceful! I began this process believing that I didn't have much insecurity to be dealt with...God has so lovingly, and gently proved me wrong. It seems the remaining insecurities have been more subtle and therefore more easily ignored I guess. My prayer time was a wonderful time to really pray and focus on these remaining struggles and release them to the Lord.
Amanda J
Lubbock
Lisa B. -
Thank you so much. I receive that prayer with my whole heart. Today is tough. It was interesting that you sent this to me at noon, because my greatest difficulty is between 12 and 3ish. I don't know why. I do okay in the morning and in the evening. I was hoping for a response and some encouragement and wow, you delivered. Thank you so much. I have been saved for many years and I love the Lord so much. May He bless you for taking the time to give a cup of water to someone who needed it.
In Christ,
CC
My dear sisters I just had to share a verse that came to me as I was doing part 2 of our assignment for this week. I pray it will be an encouragement to each of you as we battle our insecurities.
"With God we WILL gain VICTORY and HE WILL trample down our enemies (insert INSECURITIES in place of enemies)!!!!" Psalm 60:12
Ginnie/FL/44/Single
Been in hiding, coming out. I don't want to miss what God may have for me. Psalm 34:4. Thank you for the prayer, Beth. I love Him and thank Him that He wants all of us to be women of character, strength and dignity. I couch my life with Psalm 107:20 and Deuteronomy 32:47. His Word is my life and brings healing. Thank you for taking us on this journey into greater freedom.
Carol
50's
married
OK
I just did chapter 9...at times the words were so blurry, but POWERFUL nonetheless. I will be reading this over each day until our next assignment. Thank you for pointing out that He wants this for us as much as we do, so we all need to just KNOW that it is done!
Thank you for EVERYTHING! You are amazing!
Janice
44
Tumwater, WA
Single
Thank you Beth, for starting out the chapter by asking us to carve out some time where we could purpose to be alone and to pray. It helped me to have the advance warning and to be able to "get everything ready".
This week, I have been seeing through many different things, what a BIG and AWEsome God we have. He is working in mighty ways all around this world, and He's doing it through ordinary people who are willing to walk with Him.
As I prayed through this chapter, He was so good to meet with me and convict me of sin, and to forgive me as well.
I've had opportunities this week to talk with one of my young sons as he was sharing how the desire to fit in with the kids at school was leading him to do things he knew to be wrong and didn't even want to do. Even the boys deal with insecurity! I was telling him that he didn't need to let those boys make him feel bad. That he was infinitely precious to God and God was the One he needed to live to please. As I was praying through the chapter this morning, it hit me how much I do for the approval of others rather than the approval of God, (thus giving others the opportunity to get at my security). God help me to live for You alone! I don't need to look for my worth, my security in others. I am already crowned with glory and dignity. Thank You Jesus!
40's
Married
Seattle, WA
Simplebeauty - you said "can feel the almighty hand of God working in my life! I haven't laughed this hard at work or well in life in almost ten years! At first I thought just how much coffee have I been drinking lately." and I almost spit the coffee out that I was drinking. I was thinking almost the exact same thing last night as I stood in the kitchen preparing dinner with my husband. I felt GIDDY - completely and utterly GIDDY. Just to be alive and relieved of this burden.
and cindy Childers you remarked on the part of the prayer that "all people have God-given dignity even if they don't yet have eternal life through Jesus Christ". I just wanted to yell AMEN in your direction for your thoughts. I also was so comforted when I first read that line because that meant back then, before I knew Him, He loved me and had given dignity to me and He saw me like that even if I did not.
I so wish I could respond to each and every one of these posts. Beth, I bet you wish you had a few more hundred hours in a day. Thank you to all you who are letting me in to your lives to be able to pray for you and your loved ones.
GIDDY ladies!! God bless you all!
Dear Sweet Beth,
Karen
51
Delightfully Married
Pinehurst, Tx
I had NO idea I could actually get my dignity back!!!! Actually, I'm not sure I ever really possessed the thing! I come from a background full of abuse, which I ignorantly continued to play out through most of my adult life. I cannot tell you the joy that fills my heart knowing that dignity has been waiting for me! What a precious gift! Actually, I have to share something. God has dreamed big through me for years and after reading and praying through Chapter 9, I had a dream and you were in it! You dressed me from head to toe and even did my HAIR!!! You dressed me with dignity! I definitely looked restored and quite dignified. =) I know it is representative of all that God is doing through this study with you. I can't thank you enough for helping me. THANK YOU!
Hey sweet Beth! Can't wait to grab hold of Chapter 9! Every book you (and God) have written has blessed my life so much. I just found out that my latest mission article is going to be published in a Chinese Christian magazine! Such a "Yea, God!" I didn't even seek it ... but God promises to reward us when we seek Him! I think I learned that from you! ;) Love you!
Shelli
41
married (23 years!)
Fort Worth, TX
Karen Parker - LOVE it! <3
My wonderful mother in law bought this book for me. I was so excited to get started and then my laptop broke. Its now up and running and im happy to start gettin some healin =) Im sooo behind, you guys are already on chapter 9. i guess ill just start here. i tried to blog with my rediculous blackberry but it kept messing up on me. Im ready to get started. im sad ive missed. i hope i can catch the security train. choo choo ;)
demi
30's
married
kentucky
(posting this one anonymously)
late 20s
single
The prayer contained some truth that I definitely needed to hear at this point on my journey with God. I needed the reminder that God will only shed light where He's willing to heal (pg. 167). And to ask for help to not confuse healing with betrayal (pg.171), as I often feel that way and struggle with that as a people-pleaser by nature.
The Scriptures . . . there were so many that spoke to me from that post . . . limiting it to just 5 was a challenge. But 5 of them I can actually learn and remember and use that truth in the battle with insecurity.
Having a very difficult season of life right now and it's hard to even pray. Resisting. God seems distant and my desire for Him fading. Aware something isn't right and trying to hold on best I can. I am falling deeper into depression. I am reading and following along, struggling for focus. Please pray for me.
Patti
48
Single
Michigan
This comment has been removed by the author.
Loretta
Wiggins, MS
30's
divorced (mom of 3)
1. I was in the process of moving into a place of my own.I didn't have my electricity on yet, but knew that over there would be quieter than here at my brother's so I parked out in front of my new apartment to do 9. God gave me just enough light to get half way through when my new neighbor tapped on my window to ask if I would be moving in I told her yes and such. Then like they were not sitting on the front porch watching me and without missing a beat, I switched on the dome light to the car and finished my heart-felt cry to the Great IAM as lead by Beth. I know they must think I'm so weird, especially since it was almost another week ater this before I physically moved in, but ya know what I don't really care. To God be the glory!
2. I did this! The first and last, mine Longmeadow Mama's and another in between. And then today I had an issue I need God confidence and anointing for... so Keli prayed over me Ps 121 from OHIO!!!... so I added it to the facing page as well.
Lord You are so amazing. Please keep planting, growing, and cultivating our security. Help us to be beacons of light to all who see us. May this boldness in You spread like wild fire Be with Beth in her travels and meet with all those in Canada in a tangibly undeniable way. All these request for honor and glory in Jesus name amen.
I must share w/you sisters in Christ of my amazing day and a decision that even surprised myself! I am going to start chapter nine in a bit but wanted to share a praise and I knew my sweets sisters would understand. . . Today I planned my own 40th birthday party w/my bestest girlfriends!! I never thought I would do that but I found such strength and security in myself to acknowledge I cared and wanted to share such a wonderful moment w/my girlfriends that have shared and meant so much to me! And no matter what anyone says or does I am going to celebrate!! I could just shout it from the mountain top. . .I am worth loving myself, God has blessed me, and I can celebrate everyday b/c I am His!!! It felt like a hug from God. . Hope you celebrated something today!! :)Thanks
Jackie
First of all...To Patti (3/12 @ 7:06pm) - your post is weighing heavy on my heart and I want you to know that I'm praying for you. At my Bible study last night, Beth taught us that God does not let us go through difficult times unless it is critical for fulfilling the purpose He has for our lives. That was such a powerful message for me since I've recently come out of my own tough season. Keep holding on, trust that God is working in your life, and remember that He loves you SOOOO much.
About chapter 9...God gave me the gift of a whole quiet hour to be able to go through this prayer. What surprised me was how filling in the blanks brought out thoughts I didn't even know I had. I found out that I fear that people will find out things about me and then won't like me. I'm also afraid of having too much responsibility because I think I'll make the wrong decisions. I think understanding what my fears are is a necessary first step towards my healing.
I have daughters, so the part of the prayer that said "Make me the kind of woman a little girl could follow to dignity and security." really got to me. I need to allow God to work in me in these areas not just for me, but also for my daughters.
Beth, thank you so much for letting God use you to give us new insights into ourselves & our relationship to Him. I'm now going through a huge growth spurt in my faith journey and I'm excited to see where God will lead me next.
40's
Married
North Carolina
Beth, I was about 3 feet away from you last night when you walked down the aisle. Welcome to TO!!! Thank you so much for coming and it was truly anointed---praying for you, my Texan sister with the great hair!
Love, thoughts and prayers,
Sita (from Rexdale Alliance Church in Toronto)
I did my week 9 homework... Thank you Beth for those words how do you know me? I realize that it is the Lord speaking to me though you. Our Lord is amazing.
I've been doing the reading but that is about all haven't been doing the online stuff... Now I realize why, I am too insecure! I don't write well and I don't like people reading my "stuff". If it's "not perfect" I don't want to put myself out there for rejection. This has effected all areas of my life may the Lord forgive my arrogant heart.
Thank you Beth
Liz
50
married
Oregon
I was blessed with a couple free hours yesterday so I prayed through chapter 9....powerful. I then followed it with some music/praise time. "You Changed My Name" with Travis spoke volumes to me. I felt like through that through this book God is changing my name from "insecure" to "secure". The other song that ministered to me during my praise time is "This Is My Destiny" by Dennis Jernigan. I need to get that one into my heart and head.
SD
30's
married
This past week, any time that an insecure thought would come into my mind, I would instantly identify it as a lie, and replace that thought with the words "She will clothe herself with strength and dignity". I know that God is using those words as a replacement for the negative thoughts I have for myself. Praise God! I'm exhausted from a lifetime of going over and over my insecurities in my head. I am tired of condemning myself and critiquing myself on every action or word I say.
I feel a new freedom in these two words: strength and dignity!
As I read this book,I am continually reminded of the "Believing God" Bible study and the 5 pledges of statement of faith: *God is who He says He is *God can do what He says He can do *I am who God says I am *I can do all things through Christ *God's Word is alive and active in me. Thank you, Jesus!
Amy
married
40
Kansas City
I was so touched by Chapter 9 - what a beautiful "God-thing" He gave you, Beth, to help us pray through what needs to change in our lives after bringing it before our Father. It touched me deeply with tears and emotions of sorrow and hope, with the knowledge that God can change me if I just let Him. He showed me behaviors based on non-relationships with my father and step-mother, which translated into being guarded relationally with my husband and children. I want so much for the walls in my life to be torn down and am trusting Him to do this work in my life. I feel I have wasted so much of my life through complacency and not seeing things as they are and want today to be a new day, a new beginning, a new start with my relationship with God and my family.
Kit
60's
married
Central Islip, NY
Patti, I am praying for you. You aren't alone here.
Chapter 9 was a cleansing, releasing time for me - one I'll want to revisit. I am daily purposing to remember that my security is in Him alone, and that it can't be taken from me.
Susan
Ms. Beth,
This doesn't apply to my homework but I wanted to tell you a cute little story this morning. I am having my morning coffee and and my devotional time. Decided to watch online one of your Wednesday's with Beth (Trusting God), because I needed it and had a sweet moment. My 3 year old son comes over to me and says, "Who is that mommy?", and without even thinking about it, I said " Mommy's friend". After he left, I thought about that for a second. Although I don't know you personally, have never laughed over a cup of coffee, I do consider you a friend. You are a mentor to me as well as someone that God put into my life to teach me and show me what it looks like to love God. Thank you for being a part of my morning...
Andrea Roberts
32- Married
Mansfield, TX
Liz Married 40s Florida
I loved Chapter 9. I haven't had a lot of time alone in the last few weeks with my husband home on medical leave. But I prayed God would provide some quiet moments, and He did. So I pray for others to see God provide time to sit quietly and pray thoughtfully. Even when the plumber showed up at the door to work on some sprinklers outside, it didn't take away from my calm, and I went right back to the Chapter.
This prayer was so well worded--it really covered the places where I have fear, where I have caused my own misery, where others have caused me misery, and where I have tried to make everything "all about me." I was thankful that the prayer included time for confession and thanksgiving--that was good for me.
A few quotes that meant the most to me were "Flood my life with purpose and compassion. Be my strength in weakness." "Please deliver me from self-pity and a life of excuses and rationalizations.""Help me to cease being so easily wounded, but at the same time, keep me from being hardened." "I thank you with my whole heart for working so diligently in my life."
Karen
Single
Dover, NH
This was a very powerful time with God! I'll be reading this many times through. God is showing me that because of my insecurities, I don't really trust Him on a day to day basis. I often feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders and I feel alone. I really responded to "You have been with me every moment, even when I felt there was no one to take care of me" from page 170. I need to let go of my need to control my life and let Him take the weight of the world on His shoulders.
Robyn
Queen Creek Az
40's married
I'm sure many others can attest to this as well, this book is in my hands at the right time!!!! Thank you Beth!!!
There are so many 'nuggets' in this chapter I'm not sure where to start. I've underlined the ones that I physically felt pulled to so I'll just name a few here....
From pg 169 "From now on Lord, and every day for the rest of my life, heighten my conviction until I'm instantly aware when insecurity is my own making. Help me to recognize any form of pride or unbelief and to refuse it immediately."
And from pg 171 "Help me to stop confusing a change in my circumstances with a change in my security status."
My husband was laid off last May and my life has been tossed and turned about ever since. I know the Lord is leading me into something so much bigger than myself. He's ready to launch me there and this is a huge step into that!!!
Thank you, Beth, for being such an obedient servant of our Lord!!!
marilyn
61
MO
well...........i've thought about number 1 for a couple of days. i've also been reading the posts and have noticed, many times, disappointment, present day and fear of future disappointment. GOD is reminding me that this episode on earth is just the prologue to our real lives. GOD has placed eternity in our hearts and i think that has alot to do with why we can feel so disappointed by life and so alone in the here and now i bless each blogger on here who has a great husband, wonderful children, and are living what sounds like the 'good' life. but, though it isn't often included in the different posts , i've lived long enough to know we all have our trials and tribulations............some worse than others. it made me think of Peter asking JESUS about John's future. basically JESUS told Peter not to compare but to follow HIM. i too have had times of wondering 'why me???????'. that is a fruitless question isn't it. when thinking about what i feared most...........alot of things went thru my mind until i arrived at the fact that i'm not afraid of those things...............though the prospect of them was not pleasant. when my 16 year old daughter died, that was the beginning of my understanding that i had thought that this life was my little heaven before heaven.................i discovered in the most painful way imaginable that it is not. it is part of satan's scheme, just as in the garden, to sow disappointment in our hearts and suspicion that GOD's holding out on us. when i lost my daughter.........in trying to make sense of this devastating loss........i went to my Bible. i looked at the lives of the disciples/apostles, these chosen men of GOD who gave up everything for the call GOD placed on their lives. there lives make any of our lives look like a picnic. these men, insofar as it is possible for humans to obey and follow, all were martyred. thru much prayer and Bible study i have come to know that joy and contentment are found in the LORD alone, regardless of our circumstances. HE's the only who has and who is able to promise to always be there for each and everyone of us and HE is more than enough. so often i wanted HIM to send someone/something to comfort me and HE always sent HIMSELF and i found the truth of the fact that hE is enough............our very best friend, the perfect bridegroom, the perfect parent. HE has promised to restore the years the locust has eaten. today, i work on patience to endure what lies ahead for the joy set before me. this is not to say that it's all hard here, by any means, there's so much joy along the way, if we're open to it. was it yogi berra who said 'it ain't over til it's over' ??? be of good cheer, it definitely ain't over til it's over. it has often been said that the playing field is level at the foot of the cross and just as John did not have it easier than Peter, GOD rules and reigns over each of our lives.........continue to perfect us until the day of CHRIST!
The Journey Continues ~
What a humbling honor and blessing to be able to pray for you last night and EARLY this morning from California!!!
I love you Beth!!!
Just close your eyes and picture ALL OF US SIESTA'S Surrounding you (Like a sports team ready to take to the field) and rootin' you on ~ then all of our hands reach out together and we YELL "HALLELUJAH" as you go into the world and preach the gospel of Christ Jesus!!! GLORY!!!
PRAYING OVER YOU AND THE LPM TEAM AS YOUR SHARE THE WORD IN O' CANADA!!!
With "Heaven Bound" blessings,
Kim Safina
age 40's ~ hangin on until May 14
Cayucos, California
Joy
Married, 32
TN
Just finished "doing" the prayer. I feel a change in my spirit. Although, I am a little anxious about possible triggers coming my way this week. My plan is to reread it every day if I have to until "it reverberates into every corner of my life and invades the bone marrow of my belief system." My Father knows how desperate I am to be free. I choose to believe He will finish what He has began in me. I am excited about what I will be like on the other side of healing.
Thank you, Beth, for being so sensitive to the Holy Spirit in writing this prayer. I'm not good with putting my feelings into words. It was such a blessing!
Thank you Beth,
The prayer I read was right on, I couldn't have witten it more perfect.
I felt God right there listening and understanding and forgiving me. I have asked this before but never felt a response like this. I feel released from shame. I even feel lighter(probable the pound of tears I dropped).God is bringing me back. Just like in Jeremiah. He gave me this verse.
Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.
I will be found by you, and I will bring you back from your captivity.
Jeremiah29:12-14a
He did exactly what He promised! I believe!
Thank you Father.
Thank you Beth for getting me going in the right direction. This is all His perfect timing.
Rosie
50 Married
Tacoma, Wa
I hope you girls can indulge me in this post since I was gone on a business trip last week and could not post my homework answers. I want to be faithful to this study and not skip anything, so here are my week 4 answers:
1) There were two items that jumped off the pages at me from Ch 7. On pg 113, it talked about "all I could do was feel sorry for myself". This is an area where God has been working on me for a long time. I'm trying to remember that "its not about me". On pg 118, it said "Hate grew in my heart. I tried my best to get it all under MY control, to be in charge and make things just the way I wanted them to be." No explanation needed here.
2) 3 reasons to deal with insecurity:
A) Insecurity causes sinful behavior. I know this is displeasing to my God.
B) Insecurity breeds a "me" first attitude. Again, its not about me, but about Him and I want God first and foremost in my life. This is the only way I will find my God-given spiritual gift and accomplish what He has put me on this earth to accomplish in His name.
C) I'm tired (exhausted) of coping and not healing.
3) In Ch 8 on pg 114, it said "Because I was not finding my worth in Christ and I had alot of hatred toward males as a result of thing that happened (to me)... I attempted to find it through my relationships", this spoke to me. I have placed a significant amount of importance on my relationship with my husband to the point where some of his work relationships were starting to make me suspicious. I found some e-mails from a woman that were suggestive in nature and did it ever get a rise out of me. It caused me to be overcontrolling and generally out of control. It was not a good time in our marriage, but God is using that experience to teach me some valuable lessons about myself and my need for healing.
Nancy
38
Single
Lex, Kentucky
I took the time to do Ch 9 this morning, and was blown away by the power behind it. I've been attending a Christian recovery program for Codependency for over a year, and God has been bringing me a ton of healing through this. And, yet, while doing ch 9, I released more tears and dug a little deeper into the layer of the onion, as well as continued to feel God replacing the root of my insecurity with the root of His love. I love getting my dignity back!
I enjoyed choosing 5 verses for the back of my book too!
florida
married
50s
Although I had read through Chapter 9 last week, I took a suggestion from someone else's response, and decided to write it out by hand into my journal and pray it out loud today. It was a wonderful, powerful, and multisensory experience. It reminded me of what I knew about learning styles--the more we use all three of our learning modalities--visual, auditory, and kinesthetic (reading it, saying it out loud and writing it out by hand)--the more pathways will be created in my brain to remember the content, and hopefully to receive it into my heart for every day the Lord gives me in the future.
Had to wait until Saturday morning to pray Chapter 9. Everyone was gone so I went into my what I fondly refer to as my 'quiet room,' lit some candles and spent 2 wonderful hours with the Lord. He is bringing memories back where some of my insecurities started and helping me work through those.
I also happened upon this scripture: How can you believe when you are always wanting honor from each other? And yet you do not look for the honor that comes from the only God. [John 5:44] Lord, help me seek your honor alone!
Diane
Missoula, MT
40's, married
Heather
Pottstown, PA
20's
Divorced/Engaged
1) Reading the prayer was awesome! At first, it seemed a little weird to be reading a prayer. I started out by speaking very softly, but half-way through until the end, I was speaking louder and with more confidence. I felt the Holy Spirit empower me to conquer insecurity!
2) The verses that spoke to me were Joshua 1:9; Psalm 73:26; Psalm 112:7-8; Deuteronomy 31:8; and James 4:7-8
Just read chapter 9 and was caught a little unaware by the prayer. It messed with me just reading it through and I am definitely going to spend some seious time this week praying it through. Several things last week triggered a huge attack of insecurity, not something that has been a big issue but must have been "bubbling" under the surface. Maybe reading chapters 7 and 8 made me more aware of what was bubbling under the surface and they bubbled over last week. ( I was hormonally challenged). This prayer is so beautifully written. Thank you Beth for mapping out a way to get this dealt with once and for all. So many others can put their finger on this issue of insecurity but so few share the answer in such a way that we can apply it.
I am sensing a change coming in me, a long needed one in which I can throw of what hinders and run like the wind!!!
first time poster
married
in my 40's
I can smell victory...
Today my husband was really really sick. I really felt that I couldn't go into work and leave him all alone. He couldn't keep any food or water down and I just really felt like I needed to be with him. So I called and told them and they said it was no big deal. But even still I kept feeling guilty and second guessing myself even though I knew it was the right decision. And not to mention it really didn't matter one way or another. I finally asked Mark (my husband) am I making a bad decision? Should I just go to work. He looked me right the eyes and said "you are being insecure" and I was like woah! Yes I am. A month ago neither of us ever would have realized the root to this. And let me tell you my life is overrun with worry, second guessing and self doubt. Thank you Beth that I now understand what it is and thank you God that with you I have the strength to overcome! wahooo!!!
Jen
23
married
cincinnati ohio
Lindy
Scott, LA
30's single
God is so faithful. He ordained it that I was on a Skype call with a friend of mine who is a missionary in Bolivia right before I spent my time in prayer. She and I always give each other a heads-up on what is going on personally in our lives before we hang up. This is always a time of revelation for me as I confess my issues with someone I trust immensely. God revealed to me some issues that I had been holding back and don't you know those were the exact things He addressed in my prayer through Chapter 9. Thank you so much for that prayer, it was as if you were looking in on my soul when you wrote it.
ok so i planned to read along with you guys, but found myself going and going...
ch9 was such an incredible one...the prayer hit my heart in such a profound way. i cried, screamed, hit the floor, smiled...released my heart to Him...and continue to do so.
a few chapters ahead now, i find myself going back to it. it's earmarked in my pages, so that i can flip back to it when i feel the darkness ATTEMPT to overwhelm me....and the scriptures from the 3/6 blog brought me more tears and smiles. it IS truly amazing, miraculous even how powerful His Words, His Truth is when spoken....even moreso when believed!
thanks beth for opening up a door i honestly didn't know was locked.
Linda
St. Paul
Married
40s
What stood out to me most while praying the prayer in Chapter 9 is that I have lost hope of being used to "break the cycle" in my family, and of being used to fulfill God's purpose for me ("the specific destiny You ordained for me before time began"). I've felt like Joseph in the pit or in prison, and like Moses in the desert before he saw the burning bush - having a sense God called me to something, but finding myself instead, by others' actions and my own foolishness and fear, off track and stuck in a wilderness, and afraid that this is where I will remain.
So I will pray to and choose to believe God can and will fulfill His purpose for me, and will cling to these words:
"Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished." Luke 1:45
and
"Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed… He did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."
Romans 4:18, 20-21
Yesterday had sensed the Lord drawing me for a concentrated time with Him. In the Patriarchs study I'm presently doing, you mention that if we seem to be confessing the same sins over and over, then perhaps we need to get a bit more serious and focus on what the Lord wants to do in us. I believe the Lord pointed out how I'm often caught comparing myself to others and acting as if I'm in a competition. I also seek affirmation from my spiritual heroes. He reminded me that He never reveals to condemn, but to truly heal and equip. How blessed I was today to read ch.9 and see how the Lord was orchestrating our time together. As I believe the Spirit would have it, you reiterated several areas as mentioned above. Bless Him for just plain 'ole wanting to live life out with us. Thank you, Beth for not trying to be our saviour, but faithfully pointing us straight to Jehovah Rapha, Himself. For most of my life I've been a shameless teacher's pet. I think the Lord just reminded me that "my teacher is YAH." (transalation of Moriah in Gen 22)
Kathy B
H'ville, TN
40's
married
I'm praying for you, too, Patti. God hears those prayers of yours. He sees your cries. He holds all your tears. He promises that He is near to the brokenhearted. He knows we are dust. And as Melissa says, He knows it is scary to be us.
He is also mighty to save. And even when you don't feel you have the strength to hold on any longer, His strong arms are holding you. Your Anchor HOLDS within the veil.
It truly was such an amazing time with you in Toronto Beth. God has been stirring many of the same things in my heart and youth ministry over the last several months. (I'm a 24 yr old youth pastor in Toronto. Just moved back after living in the US for 4 yrs!)
It's exciting to hear how the Holy Spirit is connecting our hearts all over the world and how we're encountering Him in NEW, FRESH ways.
It truly was an honor to sit under your teaching today. Thank you for your heart and humility. One day I hope to meet ya ;) (along with the countless others that feel the same way I'm sure!) Been prayin for your back since you mentioned it too and that God would continue to bring you to wholeness.
Bless you fellow passionate lover of Jesus :)
Come back to Canada soon!
Love!
Ps. Loved the Canada flag they put on you at the end :)
I could go on and on about what God is doing, but simply put... After pouring myself out to God, I now am full. I know God is doing a mighty work! Thank you, Beth, for allowing Him to use you.
Durant, Ok
40's
Married
God gave me the time to close myself in my daughter's bedroom today to "do Chapter 9" just before her return home from college, and it was His perfect timing. It was very cleansing, refreshing and energizing.
All of the scriptures of strength, power and victory are so awesome!
Since you asked us to choose our 5 favorite, here are mine, but thank you so much to opening our eyes to ALL of them!
Psalm 73:26NIV
My flesh and my heart may fail; but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
I John 4:3-4NIV
This is love for God; to obey his commands, and his commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith.
Isaiah 40:28-31NIV
Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lordwill renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles,
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 41:10NIV
So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Proverbs 31:25NIV
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
Beloved Siesta Mama & Siesta's,
I am in the midst of doing the Breaking Free Study and reading the So Long Insecurity book along with you. God is healing my heart in ways I never imagined possibe.
Lastnight I was praying & God gave me something I wanted to share with you..
The wellspring of life
is stirring up in me
creating healing
creating wholeness
the lover of my soul
Jesus the King
has come to save me
has come to heal me
The rider on the horse
has come to take back
what the enemy has stolen
the pearls of purity
are being restored
to those who will reach
out and claim it for their own.
Jesus has come to set us free
from the bonds
the shackles the enemy
has placed upon us.
It is healing dear one
It is wholeness
He has come to give you.
Not just a trickle of
Living Water flows from His hand
but overflowing and spilling over to those He loves
to those He has come
to save and set free!
Mary
Single, 45
St.Paul, MN
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