Siesta Summer Bible Study Gathering Three!
Siesta Summer Bible Study (Weeks 3 and 4) -Part 1 from LPV on Vimeo.
Siesta Summer Bible Study (Weeks 3 and 4) -Part 2 from LPV on Vimeo.
(Remember: all comments are meant to come after your gathering or your solo viewing of the video as feedback to the study. Thank you for your cooperation!)
How are my favorite fellow Bible students doing? My small group has gotten so much out of Jennifer’s study, Me, Myself and Lies. Honestly, we can’t stay within our time limit for discussion to save our lives but that’s what tells me the study is getting to us! I hope the Holy Spirit is speaking to you, too. Where on earth would we be without God and His Word? Lord, have mercy. If you’re able to stay on schedule, you should have weeks 3 and 4 of your homework completed and your group discussion will be a reflection of that material. I hope you can watch the video instructions I’ve prepared for you but, just in case you have technical difficulty, here is a list of your four interactives for today’s gathering:
(The first two are from Week 3; The second set is from Week 4.)
1. In our LPM small group discussion, we never made it past the second page of Day One without stopping for discussion. Look at the top of p.57 and note the track Jennifer gave us from emotions to thoughts to actions. Discuss its relevance and any recent examples. At the bottom of that same page, she refers to “THINKING WITH OUR FEELINGS.” Discuss this familiar female propensity as well.
2. Turn to p.65 where we studied the woman with the issue of blood. In the first full paragraph, Jennifer writes, “We often face one defining circumstance that becomes the headwater from which other issues flow.” Would some of you be willing to share what your “one defining circumstance” is and how it tends to affect a number of different areas?
OK, this is not a discussion question but I want to mention it because it was one of my very favorite things and I’ve thought about it a ton since I read it. Take a glance at p.73 where Jennifer shares the story about being stuck on a plane and the little girl near her saying to her daddy, “I spy something good.” Did that speak to you, too?
Now, from Week Four:
3. Based on p.81. where Jennifer discusses what we say to ourselves when we talk to ourselves about sin: What has been your most recurrent conviction lately and what are you doing about it? (If you’re not presently doing anything about it, admitting it to your group is a start!)
Discuss how she ties up the point on p.87 with these words: “Never let the Enemy be more aware of your weaknesses than you are.”
4. Review p.88. Do you have a framework set up in your life for consistent accountability? Do you have at least one person in your life who holds you accountable in your pursuit of God and godliness and doesn’t just help you stay comfortable in your strongholds? Look at Jennifer’s statement: “The Enemy goes after the solitary and the silent.”
Discuss the fears involved in opening up to accountability and the solutions to those fears. What holds us back? Is it time? Exposure? Fear of confidence being betrayed? Talk about fears, solutions, and the importance of taking the chance.
That should keep you busy today and smack in the middle of each other’s business!Thank you so much for participating. Study hard! See you in two weeks and we’ll finish up!
I love you so much.
posted by Amanda @ 6:00 AM
145 Comments
145 Comments:
On pg 65, I recognize that I'm emotionally strained. I live in a home with two people who are constantly raging: a child with autism and a spouse with bipolar disorder. I was raised by an abusive Dad, so when these issues presented in my own home I was just bleeding inside.
Because my emotions are exhausted, I'm always defensive and hypersensitive to trouble. Sometimes I imagine trouble that does not exist and make a situation worse. My thought process is "if you increase the volume of your voice, I get ready for battle." Not a healthy way to live.
The result of living with an emotionally drained thought closet is that I don't see past the wall of anger and I constantly flee from conflict rather than learn from conflict.
Sometimes, emotions to actions can actually be healthy for me. I'm very compassionate and if a friend is sick or a child is in need, you'll find me packing up a care package with cards, flowers, and healing foods. I'm showing love with my actions. The emotion becomes unhealthy when I become consumed with healing another person, knowing that it is God who heals, not me. It's best to give a box of herbal tea, ginger cookies, tissues and a pretty card with a prayer tucked inside, and move on. Martha is learning to be more like Mary!
Solo Siesta
1. I think one of the hardest things in cleaning the thought closet is figuring out the root of the problem. Often, triggers spur emotions and thoughts so quickly that it is hard to stop, go back, and trace what caused it and what the lie is.
3. My biggest issue lately is that God has been showing me that I use thoughts of my bff to pacify myself when I am hurting, which is idolatry. God has now separated us, so I am finally submitting this and trying to reprogram, but it is a painful process.
One more thing - symbolic - as we clean out our thought closets, I started actually cleaning out the closets in my house. Interestingly, the one I started with had a stack of papers that I have been sorting through - notes from Bible studies, journal entries, etc. As I go through these papers, I am throwing away the unimportant things and sorting the good Bible notes. Also, I am also revisiting the incredible journey God has had me on in the last 7 years by organizing the journal entries. In some ways we have come so far, yet a few issues remain the same.
I would encourage others to try this - clean out a closet or two. Whether it is paperwork or just a bunch of junk that has gotten tossed in there over the years. Purge the unnecessary stuff and organize the rest. The sense of accomplishment is like a physical display of what we are doing in our minds.
Thanks SiestaMama!
Michele M
Liverpool, NY
I'm not actually doing the Bible study so I hope I'm not doing a no-no by posting. Just wanted to say that something you said today really struck a chord with me. This statement...."The enemy goes after the solitary and the silent". That describes me for as long as I can remember! Solitary. Silent. Maybe I need to change my ways. Thanks for the thought!
God bless y'all.
Marilyn...in Mississippi
1. The emotion that I often feel is being hurt by my husband for something he did not do that IN MY MIND I wanted him to. I struggle with this less now than I did 4 years ago, however, it's still a struggle. The thought that comes out of that is that I must not be worthy; he must not love me. The action is being upset with him or taking anger out on him. How silly is it that I can't just TELL him what I want and need? I am SO guilty of thinking with my feelings. I'm so glad you referred back to that today because I sure didn't give it enough thought when I read it!
3. I had to re-think on this one as well. I have had a serious issue come up lately. I'm so glad that you're using the scripture about tongues lately, because mine could use some taming! I have someone in my life who is downright horrible to me. She doesn't like me, doesn't want to be around me, feels like I've taken the spotlight off of her, etc. I feel that it's not right for her to feel that way, but she does. She's going through a rough patch in her life right now and I think she's taking it out on me. I've been very vocal to my husband and my mother and some of my friends about how horrible she is to me. I feel like the best thing to do is not to talk about it anymore. I need to not let her get me angry and upset. I need to pray for her and the situation she's in and not take it personally that she attacks me whenever we're together. The Enemy was definitely enjoying watching me get down about this. I'm taking the high road.
4. Iwould love to have an accountability partner. We've just moved to a new area and I literally don't know anyone. The women I worked with last year I won't be around anymore because I'm changing jobs to become a stay-at-home-mom. I desperately need someone in my life to be a friend and hold me accountable. That's one thing I'm continuing to pray for.
When you said the "C" word I was tempted to click the off button. Girl, do not mess with my coffee! You're slapping my coffee cup hand. Could we be drinking too much coffee, the nectar of Satan? Is coffee is the ember of anger? Oh Beth....please don't go there Sister...you're making me squirm. Blessings from the hostess of the Bible Cafe!
Our group was small today. Several out of town on vacation. But two of us met anyway.
We could really identify with the emotion, thought, action sequence and had great discussion about how being aware of the emotion as a trigger for the other two is good. Actually, we decided that this study has really done that for us - raised our awareness - awareness of emotions that lead to negative thoughts and actions, awareness of the lies we are accepting and clothing ourselves with, awareness of God's voice of truth versus the insults hurled at us by the enemy.
We ended by being very aware that we will need each other at work (our group members all work at the same school) and that when school starts again and those emotions start flying we can help one another be accountable and remind each other to 4:8 our thinking. (We both loved that verse and had it written on cards before we met today.)
Wow! This is good stuff and we're so glad to be in God's word this summer, cleaning out our closets. So, when we go back to school and we're asked what we did this summer, we're gonna say, "We cleaned out our closets!"
Totally excited by God's word ...
My sister and I met via Skype this afternoon. We agree that this study is making us more and more conscious of the fact that thoughts follow emotions and actions follow thoughts, so if we want to avoid an "issue" then we'd better not let the thought closet get cluttered up. We also made a pact to just "spy" something good!
Judy, Littleton, NC
Carolyn, Oceanside, CA
PS. We will see you in Greensboro next weekend!
Greetings Spiritual Mom Beth:) from Ashley and Katie
My Bible study partner Ashley and I started thinking about ques. 1, and Ashley said that she thinks that maybe thoughts can lead to emotions that lead to action. Like when the enemy tries to place a thought in your mind, and you can choose to dwell on the thought or you can take it captive. Emotions can react to that initial thought and then action takes place. Ashley and I both think that under our defining circumstance is always the issue of trusting God or not, being surrendered to His will for us or not. Ashley is most convicted about choosing to take every thought captive, and to make sure that unwelcome thoughts don't stay. Mine is an aspect of that; I am constantly trying to confess and forsake pride and all its obvious and subtle forms. Accountablility is needed, and we want to be sure we are trusting the people God would have for us to confide in, making sure that even in accntblty, there are appropriate boundaries in that relationship. Healthy acctablty.
Blessings to you today:), ((HUGS)), Love in Him,
katiegfromtennessee
Hi Sweet Mama Beth,
I struggle with perfection. It has been an issue of late especially since we have been on a financially roller coaster with hubby not having a job, now getting one but not check until Sept. I have found myself thinking I have to do everything perfect to keep things together, including being strong for hubby and children when I feel far from it. God has helped me to see this idea of perfection started long before now but I was good at throwing it in the bin and hiding it in the back of my thought closet. So I am realizing I don't have to be perfect I can be who I am at the moment and let God and I work on it together...hard thing to learn but slowly I am. The bin is not been completely thrown out of the closet but it is not hiding int he back either.
and I don't have an accountability partner either. I am praying on this. Sometimes it is lonely especially living in a rural area where walking next door is not easily done. But God has been helping me see I need to be held accountable and have a person to open my heart to. I am sure it would have made the journey I spoke of above easier. So I continue to pray.
Love and hugs
Tammy S.
Howells, NE (going solo)
ps Mama Beth I just loved your black sweater that was so cute. and thanks for the info on caffine I am sure it was my problem yesterday driving from place to place and I couldn't possibly understand why people were driving like they were out of their minds. I am sure now it was me.
Jennifer mentioned the need for accountability partners. Scripture speaks of a 3 stranded cord isn't easily broken in Ecc 4:12. We discussed a bit how this looks different for everyone. God has shown Betty and I the package for "accountability partner" doesn't look as traditional for us. The holy spirit is using several folks in different arenas of our walks to sharpen us, to check us in our temptations. Our husbands help us in some areas of struggles and keep us grounded where our close girlfriends or Sunday school teacher might challenge and encourage us in others. Our God is so diverse to teach us and show us how He doesn't fit in any manmade box. Thank you Jesus!!!
We enjoyed learning about how our feelings turn into thoughts and our thoughts turn into actions. It is good to be reminded that we have a choice in this pattern and can decide which path we want our thoughts and actions to take.
- Heather and Shannon
Amarillo, Texas
Our group resonated with the comment about "spying" something good in each situation. We are really working on this area of our lives. Our goal this week is to turn the usual "negative" thoughts into "positive" ones. For example, if we get upset about something, instead of going from emotion (crying or yelling) to thought (irrational) to action (doing or saying something we might regret), we are going to respond to a "trigger" event differently. We are going to say to ourselves: "I spy something good!" and see the positive side of our circumstances. We know that God is in control and He can bring good from things that seem bad.
The East Greenbush, NY chapter of the Summer Siestas had a meat-and-potatoes meeting this morning. No fluff here, not today. Those closets are full of junk, and we're determined to get free. Wow, do I love these friends. We decided we have to continue meeting once a month come school time. Accountability brings out the best and worst in us, so we can get healed and get going. So glad the church of Jesus Christ is a hospital for the sick and not a
pageant for the perfect.
Learning and growing on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Joanne
Phyllis
Judy
Maryann
Arleen
My "defining circumstance" is too personal to share, but I can tell you it affects how I think and feel, and it used to affect how I saw my future. I'm realizing that I'm not defined by this circumstance, and "I am more than a conqueror!"
My most recent conviction dealt with putting God first and making sure I'm seeking Him and not His hand. I'm in the process of changing my daily schedule so my study time is in the morning instead of at night.
I'm presently praying for an accountability partner (close-by). Due to moving to a new area, I haven't found a home church yet, and I know that will help.
To God Be the Glory!
Patti, Kissimmee, FL
The mother/daughter group in Goldsboro, NC met tonight. We had great discussion about our feelings, thoughts, and actions among our life defining circumstance. The mothers have accountability partners (each other) but the girls had not thought about that before. They have committed to be each others partner in the coming days. We are all growing in Christ this summer through this study!
Susan, Courtney, Lisa, and Nicole
Patty and I met at lunch today. We really connected and both agreed that this study is allowing us to begin to understand more about the roots of what we say to each other. We both found we identified with different scripture that had very deep meaning to both of us. We agreed to be each other's accountablility partners.
We ended in prayer. I spoke the prayer and the Holy Spirit was in my heart as I prayed over both of us and a friend who is going through some health issues. It was a great hour!
I wanted to share with you a small Thanksgiving, but one I do not see very often. This weekend I read an interview with actor Stephen Moyer in the most recent issue of Venice magazine. In it he stated that he had been raised in the church but had turned his back on it... "But some things happened that changed my way of thinking. And actually all I did was just let go of not believing." Praise the Lord! We prayed for him to be able to fight the spiritual warfare he will undoubtly encounter in his profession and living and working in Hollywood.
Anyway, Patty and I are looking forward to the next 2 weeks. Personally, I am excited and a little sad that it will end.
I ask for all your prayers as God has called two other ladies and me to take over leading the Beth Moore study group in our church and community. In the past it has been 75+ women in two groups. We need your prayers for God's leadership in the ministry He is calling us to do.
Blessings to all of our Siesta and our very special Siesta mama, Beth,
Mary Ann & Patty
3M Company, St. Paul (Woodbury), MN
First and foremost! Don't go messin' with our caffeine. The reverse can also be true. A lack of coffee can lead to crazy thoughts and downright meaness.
Seriously, we had a powerful time tonight discussing the interactives. As I try to summarize the highlights, I am overwhelmed trying to keep this brief. The Lord did a work among us tonight and I want to tell it all to His glory but I will spare you and stick with two highlights.
We all struggle with being awakened to sin in our lives. Since none of us are blatant criminals and are Christian women, we shared that we struggle with confession. We all run down a mental checklist and seem to be just fine. Can you say spiritual pride??? Boy, week 4's work opened our eyes to the sin entrenched in our thought closets. Others might not see it but the Lord knows. We have more cleaning to do - the story of our lives!
Two of the three of us do not nor ever have had accountability partners/sisters. God is impressing this need on our hearts. Our one star student shared how a 19 year relationship with her accountability partner has keep her on track in her relationship with the Lord. We are praying for accountability partners. We do have some questions. Do you think we need to seek someone older and wiser or are we good with someone our own age? Are we making this harder than it is?
I said two comments. Forgive me as I end with a third. We LOVE the "I Spy Something Good" game. It is helping us keep a godly perspective during the various life challenges each of us is experiencing.
Thank You ~ Thank You ~ Thank You for this great summer experience. To God be the Glory.
Karen, Peggy & Leigh
Montgomery, AL
Going Solo.
This is an awesome study.
1-Personal but true and I needed to deal with it. I am a slave to my feeling but i am seeing a difference since starting this study.
2-The youngest of 7 children and being totally ignored and having no value=insecurity for sure.
3-I have a couple of people to hold me accountable, but I do fear burdening them.
Sharon
Wasington, IL
Hello fellow siestas! I cannot begin to tell you how much I needed this study! Homework:
1) Emotion: anger. Leads to Thought: How dare she imply that about me. Stupid woman! Leading to Action: tears followed by a raging tantrum with threats (not to her, but about her). Okay, I'm not proud of this, however the accountability thing comes into play here and maybe some of you will pray for me in this area.
2) My defining moment was my first divorce. It has left me bitter and angry and I have trust issues. My first husband cheated on me multiple times and tried to give me an STD (praise the Lord he didn't). This affects every aspect of my life. I do not trust easily and Satan knows he can use this to stir up strife in my life.
I absolutely loved the story of the little girl and her father on the airplane. I need to do this more frequently. I tried it and it helps in times of stress to "spy something good". Keeps me focused on all the blessings in my life that the Lord has provided!
3) I have been most convicted of anger and bitterness lately. This study has been a starting point and I know that the Lord is clearly telling me that its time to work through these issues instead of just dwelling in them.
4) When you ask about accountability, I have to honestly confess that I am not really accountable to anyone. My best friend is someone I can talk to and confide in, but I am realizing that I don't share the really important stuff with her. I share the issues on the surface (daily life), but never really share the important ones that I need to be held accountable on. I believe this is all tied to the trust issue brought on by my first husband's actions and consequently my divorce (see question #2 above). I know that accountability is important and its what God wants.
5) Beth asked what triggers me to grab lies from time to time. It is absolutely, without a doubt, stess. Most recently, stress at work, but any stress can be a trigger.
This is absolutely the hardest bible study I have ever done, but I am so grateful that God has allowed me to be a participant. I am excited about growing and learning and changing.
3 - my current conviction from the Lord is about worry. I have always been a worrier, and never really dealt with it, because I thought "that's just the way I am!" Complete rationalization! When I finally came face to face with the SIN of worry, I realized that I have a choice to worry or not. I couldn't ignore it anymore. I confided to my husband about this, and he has begun to hold me accountable in this area, which I really appreciate. I am also consistently praying that the Holy Spirit will convict me BEFORE I actually begin to worry!
Talking about accountability, I just want to encourage those siestas out there who don't have an accountability partner. I know people have lots of reasons that they don't have a person like this in their lives, but you are missing out on such a HUGE blessing! God put my accountability partner and I together over 5 years ago, and I can't imagine getting thru life without her! We pray for each other, love on each other, encourage each other, speak the truth in love to each other...her presence is my life is so precious to me! So don't miss out - begin to pray that God will lead you to someone and you'll have the courage to reach out!
Mary Beth in St. Louis, MO (going solo)
Our group discussion started after we watched Jennifer and Beth’s video clips with one of the ladies asking, “How could someone like Beth Moore have insecurities?”
So we ask “what makes us insecure?” These are some of our answers, betrayal by someone close to us, satan’s attack, growing older and not being able to do things as well as we once did; which started our discussion of the statement “if I can do it anyone can” aren’t we suppose to be able to do everything, which lead to, “why do we compare ourselves to other women?” Lots of talk and tears. One of our ladies quoted her Aunt Mayse, “There’s nothing meaner than a mean woman!”
After we discussed the questions and shared how God has been dealing with us, we came full circle back to”insecurities”.
Our prayer and encouragement for each other is, “when the insecurities of this world come into our thought-closet, going to God’s Word will be our first desire, not our last resort.”
Ladies from Forsyth, MO (south of Springfield, where Jennifer Rothschild lives)
We love you Beth and Jennifer!
I'm a solo girl. I really appreciate this format, because it keeps me accountable to completing the study in a reasonable time! I know that I can't fall behind because Tuesday is "video day"! Thanks.
1) I don't generally think of myself as emotional, but this spoke to me in the area of parenting. I have two small children and parent solo most of the time, so a frequent emotion is frustration. Which leads to the thoughts: "My kids are impossible." or "Won't anyone listen to me?!!" The action is yelling or making a scene. I don't like that. So I'm making an effort to recognize when that emotion is taking hold and try to combat it.
2) I'm not sure about this. I can't really think of one defining circumstance, but I have an idea. I'll work on it.
3) Sounds like we have the same recurring conviction. My words. I used to be so careful, but now they get the better of me, and when I think of the way things come out of my mouth, it makes me cringe! I've been trying (though not hard enough) to memorize scripture and pray about the words of my mouth. The conviction started a few weeks ago with this doozy: Prov 12:18: Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tounge of the wise brings healing.
4) I do not have an identified accountability partner, but I do have a very close group of prayerful friends and share different things with different people. I would like an accountability partner, but honestly, the reason I don't have one now is that I asked someone previously who turned me down. Instead, we started a small (3 people) prayer group that does have an accountability and honesty factor. It may not fit the textbook definition, but it works well for me.
Thanks for giving us solo girls an opportunity to participate in the group!
The group from Madison, Alabama, met again and the bonding is increasing each time we meet. It's going to be hard to just one last time! Bonding through God's Word. Just the best.
1) Emotion, thought, action. One lady said that the emotion of defensiveness led to thoughts of anger which led to "turning comments into insults".
2) Defining circumstance: Two sisters said the death of their mom when they were in their early 20s was their defining moment. Good that came out of it was that they had to reach for God and not a parent. Complications from it led to anger, resentment and not "growing up into an adult" like they should of at that age.
3) Most reoccurring conviction: All of us agreed with you, Beth! Our mouths! When will we be quiet? One lady shared that she kept talking because she wanted someone to tell her she was right! She loved knowing and hearing those words spoken to her.
4) Accountability partner: Challenges included lack of time, whether or not we trusted someone like that, whether we deep down truly wanted to held accountable. Ouch! We decided to trust God to send us someone if we didn't have anyone to approach.
Great study! So very thankful to be in God's Word this summer.
True Confessions of the MML sista's. 10 in Tulsa OK in a conf.room at lunchtime & 1 in TX 7-21-09
Today.. beyond my own misgivings, my own feelings of failure, emotional meltdowns, lack of confidence and lack of strength and on the verge of tears, I sent the email to meet for our MML study. The replies began with apologies..forgetting books, bibles, no time for homework, and on and on they came. It was stunning so many reasons(all very real and pressing) we could've used Not to meet.
But then the truth came to the surface with Natasha's email, how we come under attack when we are doing exactly what God wants us to do. (Every one of us in some way was being attacked) We all chose to meet anyway! We need each other! Praise God! 10 of us in the conference room at work in Tulsa, Oklahoma and one on the speaker phone from Hallsville, Texas.
We started with a prayer - and when the cd for worship wouldn't play Gwen suggested Yahoo music, and we listened to a powerful worship song about Stomping the devil under our feet!!
We only got into the second question before our time was up. We opened up with our struggles, and issues, talked about emotions, thoughts and the actions they lead to, we got very real. We ended with Kalein's song pick - it moved deep with in my spirit, and went around the room praying.
We were most thankful for every woman there today! God moved among us, His spirit was flowing. We overcame our own self convicting thoughts, we overcame the Roaring Lion who was shouting at our door. We overcame by encouraging each other to meet together regardless of what we lacked. We overcame because of our Love for the Lord, and the power in accountability! He was faithful and met us there.
Thank you Marybeth, Kathy, Natasha, Gwen, Carol, Ashlee, Kalein, Miranda, Monica & Judy, thank you for your Courage with a capital C, determination, and love, you are all an inspiration to me. Julie
Rankin, TX siestas had a great evening time together. We had a few technical issues, but we didn't let that keep us from loving Him or encouraging each other.
On p65 we discussed how at this moment a few of us have some specific things that are just consuming our thoughts. We are so focused on IT (whatever it is for each one) that we forget to look at what we do have in our lives and that we may be missing blessings because we are so caught up thinking about IT.
We also discussed our extended families and how this is an area of struggle for each of us. How we can get on a train and just ride it all the way across the country with complaining or frustrations. We decided that we needed to "4:8" our thoughts (p73) and remember that we do have family, and they are good people, just different and leave it at that.
The greatest areas of sin struggle that we discussed were:
1.words that we speak to others (that hurt them),
2.assuming that others don't care about us when maybe it wasn't even about us (they were focused on something else, they just didn't see us, etc.),
3. anger/defensiveness.
We discussed how sometimes our sin is because we just want someone to notice us or affirm us and that we need to use the Biblical truths to combat the lies from the enemy (the statements on p90 for example)
As the leader of the group I just want to give some PRAISE TO THE LORD!! We have seen the Lord do some awesome works in very specific issues that we have been praying about in the last 4 weeks. It's so cool to see Him answer prayer. Also, a BIG shout out to Beth for organizing this study. When we all got together the first time we all expressed a desire to have godly friendships. You would think it wouldn't be hard in a town with a population of 500ish (max...yes that's the population of our TOWN), but the enemy doesn't want us to band together and he's done a pretty good job or isolating for a long time. This has been such a neat way to fellowship and meet some sisters and we have been so blessed!
It was easy to track the emotions to actions-What isn't always easy is choosing to listen to Wisdom. I hear the alarms going off & well sometimes I just go ahead and pitch my fit--even if I am the only in the room! (I know: tisk,tisk, tisk-Gotta let that Watchman of my thought-closet (Wisdom)do Her job!)
The one defining circumstance from which other issues flow took some time to really think about...glad I took the time & pinpointed it!Can't help but feel like I'm trying to place blame though...
Recurrent convictions lately-it's funny because during the day an "issue" will pop up & I think to myself "where did you come from?" and then I get busy with the day--I forget to bring it before the Lord. Asking us to do this helped me to take the time to think about it & do just that! I'm so grateful.
Each of the folks in my group tonight, including me, had an accountability partner! Praise the Lord! There is safety in relationships!
Left tonight with a sweet, sweet peace that as we are in the trenches, dealing with our issues, God is preparing each of us for the specific call on our lives that we may stand strong & remain in the peace of God when the roaring lion attacks.
Becky-Mobile,Alabama
Six of us met tonight and we had a fantastic discussion mainly centered around how we want to stop thinking with our feelings. Instead, we recognize that love is not just a feeling but an action. When love is viewed as a feeling, it is easy to fall out of "love;" but when viewed as an action, it is something tangible that is worth holding on to even if the "feeling" temporarily isn't there.
We also talked about our defining circumstance and I think many of us were surprised to learn that we share a similar one. All of us recognize that we have to monitor how we let that defining circumstance become the center of how we react to situations. Instead, we have to define who we are in Christ and separate the past negative circumstances that may drive our response.
Finally, we agreed that accountability partners are a necessity of life and the invitation was extended to establish that relationship with someone, hopefully within our small group.
We are looking forward to finishing up the study and seeing what lies ahead.
Tammy Elrod
Mechanicsville, VA
The three of us in our group just finished meeting tonight. We all seem to be learning how our thoughts are attached to our emotions and behaviors. Getting truth to come in and replace the lies of the enemy is a challenge, but with prayer and accountability and the Word, it can be done..this study has been so rich in speaking to each of us in our group, especially related to our self esteem. We see the need to seek more of the Word to put truth in our thought closets. blessings, Pam in San Diego
Hey Siesta Mama Beth!
Wow week 3 out of 4! I am sad to say that this was my first time meeting with my group of Siesta Girlies, I have had to do it solo (it’s been a busy summer) But I do have to say it is WAY better with the girls! Anyways, I offered to leave the feedback to take some of the weight off of our “Mini Siesta Mama“. So here we go!
Task #1- (pg. 57) One of the gals brought up… that our emotions build on top of each other, and that when we think with our feelings we lose sense of reality- God’s reality. For instance let us say I am having my quite time one morning, and with that I decide to have a cup of Joe. I finish my quite time and go to get ready for the day. I reach into my cabinet to grab my “Bumpit“, to have that all empowering bump to get me set for the day. Low and behold it’s GONE! Well now, my day started out GREAT! But now here comes the emotions. Where could it be! Who could of taken it? Did my dog want her very own bump? How could anyone do this to me. As I search for it I get madder and madder. I search high and low for it. It is no where to be found. At this point I am so upset that I can not find it, my whole day is shot! So, was I following my emotional rollercoaster, letting my emotions stack up higher and higher, OR was it the Joe! (Sorry had to go there!)
Task #2 (pg. 65) -Our defining circumstance, I think the group was all in agreement that our childhood still effects us today. Things that were spoken to use growing up. Things like your not smart enough, you just an average student, ect. But we, like the woman with the issue of blood, need have faith and press through, press through to Jesus.
Task #3 (pg 81)- Most recurrent conviction lately, We all had different ones. But what we did agree on is the verse Psalms 39:1. The whole muzzle thing is right on.
Task # 4 (pg 88)- Accountability! I do believe the place where Satan likes us best is ALONE! We have to have an accountability partner, some of us have several, that’s cool. As long as we are not alone. Like it says in Ecclesiastes 4:12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken. And like Jennifer said it’s not me, myself, and I… It’s you, a buddy and Jesus!
Thank You for all you do Beth!!
Blessings to you from your
Siesta Girlies over here in Arizona!
Kim, Georgia, Denise, Lynette, Deanna, and Jennifer
Last night was truly Spirit led at bible study. Amazingly we discussed that a lot of christians try and hide their flaws instead of being real and admitting that we all deal with stuff... Most of the issues our group discussed were areas like insecurity, finances, young children and high expectations, and worry.....We all put it out there and many were able to learn and grow from others past mistakes. One thing we all walked away with was to focus on Titus 2 and begin to equip the women younger among us. We sometimes feel we are alone when we deal with our issues and our group is determined to reach out to others. We all agree that we appreciate your honesty and willingness to be transparent for a lot of women. We all need to be a little more like that. Thank you from all of us Siestas here in Plant City, FL
What an awesome night we had! The discussion and sharing is good that no one wants to go home! We really could just talk all night, and not about trivial stuff -we're talking God-stuff. All six of us are so thankful for this study and what it's doing in our lives. Thank you Beth and Jennifer - talk about a dynamic duo!
Here's some of what we discussed:
1. We all had to admit that "thinking with our feelings" has been a long standing practice with each of us. Funny thing is, it's not something that was obvious to us until this study pointed it out. It has been so ingrained in our nature that it was literally who we are. Or I should say, who we HAVE BEEN. Praise God we're are seeing those feelings for what they are - just feelings. And rarely are those feelings founded on truth; they are typical founded on a faulty assumption. Like I said, this study has been profound - and we're not even done yet!
2. The defining circumstance. What a time of sharing we had. One of our ladies, for the first time, could actually see just where much of her anger issue began. For the first time, she could see the beginning. Another was finally able to verbalize that defining moment in such as was as further the healing process. She's not completely healed of her issue yet, but she as able to say that God has brought her through much of that healing process.
3. Knowing your sin - man did that give us a wake-up call! Jennifer really did "get all in your business" on that one. Lots of good discussion with NO condemnation. And the part about knowing your weakness better than the enemy, well, those words were invaluable. That's one of those phrases you tuck away and keep referring back to to make sure you're still up to date on your sins.
4. Accountability - we all need it and we were all willing to give each other the right to call on and ask the hard questions -in love of course. The bonds of sisterhood have never been stronger. We are well on our way to a beautiful thought closet.
Our group of eleven women met last night. The discussion was very open. Some of our sin problem was our own pride, self-sufficiency, and judging others. A woman within our group made the statement as she had dealt with her own judgmental spirit, "I need to focus on my own closet. It takes me all day to keep my own laundry clean." And we certainly agreed.
Since our group consists of women in our church, it is not necessarily close friends who are already "accountability buddies" however there was more openness last night within our group once we touched on this topic. We determined that accountability buddies are sometimes for a season and may be someone who has been where we are already. Also, it is very important to be the kind of person who can be a good accountability partner: good listener, able to speak truth in love, person of integrity, and able to keep confidences.
We are thoroughly enjoying this study. Truly it is changing our thought closets and they will never be the same. God bless you and Jennifer!
Well Beth, Amanda, Melissa and LPM our group doesn't make it thru the four questions you give us! Much less a day by day review!! WOW! Still 6 of us strong. Our conversation went from dealing with emotions to why we are all being attacked heavily from the liar today. We have one group gathering to go, and he has attacked in making babies sick, keeping us late at work, to even small things like having your house in the middle of your husband's remodel (and it is the host home!!). As we all learn to clean out the junk, and get a truthful closet, and learn to stand with a fist raised high that says I KNOW THE TRUTH and I WILL LIVE BY THE TRUTH satan will attack us. But the saving grace to that (as we discussed last night) is we can stand firm in Christ and not be swayed or detered.
Thank you for picking this bible study for the summer. It has been a true blessing in so many ways that I can't even begin to list.
I am so amazed every time our group meets! Several of us had never met and we have become so close and so personal. Each meeting gets a little deeper. It's awesome to see how much we now depend on one another's support! We talked a lot about insecurities last night and how that begins the emotion-thought-action chain. Some ladies shared things in their life that have helped shape these insecurities it was so interesting to see the group just lift them up in prayer. We all became so connected with one another. Thank you so much for this!!
Talihina, OK Group
Keli
Susie
Katrina
Kortni
Sonya
Lula
Wanda
Morgan
Kathy
Ashley
Melissa
Sara
Beverly
Kari
Sharon
Our group actually started earlier so we completed the study last week and are having a celebration picnic tonight!! What a powerful study this has been and I personally have been beating the lies of the enemy in ways I never had before thanks to this study!!
I wanted to comment on the defining circumstance that becomes the headwater from which other issues flow. One of the gals in our study who has a jr. high child mentioned that she thinks so much of our issues we face today as adults probably originated in jr. high. That is when we have so many insecurities and we are so conscious of them. Those feelings then follow us into adulthood. The more I thought on that the more I was TOTALLY convinced of it. My insecurities can totally be traced back to my childhood - some jr. high and some earlier. SOOO many things I do and so many ways I act today are all due to my insecurities that started in my youth. For me, the defining circumstance that has TOTALLY caused most all my issues is being overweight as a child. Thanks to this study I am working on replacing the lies I have always believed because of that fact... like I must preform beings I don't have the looks, others don't like me because of my weight, I am not good enough, etc.
Thanks LPM for picking this study - it has been a lifechanging one for some ladies in SD!!
Our group started laughing and could not stop. Tears were rolling down our faces. Sider were hurting. I still had the hiccups when we went to bed.
Each member of our group is going through a season that is really challenging her thought closet, and we spent a significant amount of time talking about the battle. (This was NOT what got us laughing, btw.)One of our members is considering leaving a job where a Christian employer's walk does not match his talk. We pondered how we know when God calls us to stay in a difficult situation and when He is calling us out. We didn't come out with any great answers . . . but we did eventually start laughing.
I echo the other Siestas who have said this is the hardest study they have done.
The study sounds cute...cleaning out your thought closet...but this has been so incredibly deep. There were some days where I was still reeling from what I learned the day before and to glance and the upcoming days and say...whaaaat?? It is so much more than I ever anticipated. It has been such a blessing; but really hard!!!
( I'm still struck by the dicussion on page 61 and 62 regarding the reverance of God. It gave me a ton to think about.
Also what a peace it gave me to meditate on wisdom being the watchman at my closet door.)
1. I know I have a tendancy try and hide or ignore negative/overwhelming thoughts; taking part of my thought closet with me in a backpack. It just gets heavier and heavier until I just need to sit down for a moment to rest and then it all falls out.
I learned a year ago during the darkest season of my life of how dangerous this is to trust my feelings instead of God's wisdom and His truth.
And this statement of Jennifer's "that a surplus of emotion usually precedes acting without wisdom" really resonated with me. A reminder to just to deal with something immediately (no back packs allowed) and take it to God in prayer...there is no hiding in the light.
2. defining circumstance:
my childhood
3. conviction lately is faith....trusting God. Believing Him. Not putting anything else before Him. Idols of any kind.
This is where my Scripture memory has been such a powerful tool. The enemy tries to use my weakness...but God's truth says otherwise. And I love meditating on it even when I don't feel like it. I have index cards everywhere..my purse, next to my bed, bathroom counter, kitchen...
Also I realized scripture memory has helped me not be dull or tune out the enemy like she talked about. That got my attention. Being out in a jungle hearing lion roaring and not even bothered by it. That is not the state of mind I want to be in.
4. Accountability. I don't have this. I don't even know if it's fear...I could make excuses; we moved, live rurally but in reality it doesn't matter where or how long I have lived somewhere. I have my whole life just shied away from getting to close or sharing. Not that this is good. Just how I am. I will pray for accountability.
Thank you for this study.
Michelle in Vermont
We had another great gathering time last night. We really did get into one another's business and opened up about our 1 defining circumstance that has impacted our thought closets for a long time. When we came to the question about an accountability partner we are all at the same place, with no one to hold us accountable. We discussed the fear that comes with being vulnerable with someone and the fear of being judged. I think we all agreed we can be described as the strong and silent type...a dangerous place to be. We have decided we will continually meet after this Bible Study is over because it is so important.
Thanks again for facilitating this Bible Study! We are continuing to clean out our closets!
The Colorado Girls
Greetings from Karin, Sharon, and Shawna! Great discussions last night at Bible Study:
Emotions: While two of us could share stories of our emotions and feelings taking us on a journey to action that we later repented for, one group member shared the perspective of a very painful and difficult childhood on many fronts - where she cut herself off from her natural emotional responses in order to survive. Growing into adulthood her natural response can be one of detachment and to disengage. So she shared how God is restoring her emotions, restoring her feelings, and the incredible journey that has been. And that this study has come at such an incredible time, as she is now sharing the study and Jennifer's book on "Soul Talk" with her grown daughter - for some amazing healing in their family circle -- God is good.
For all of us some of the core issues or headwaters came from initial experiences in our families of origin, that led to faulty assumptions about ourselves and our true natures. Some great time of prayer and conversation - reflecting on how God is so able to restore and heal. And what great "deeper" work this study is representing as to a person, we would describe those initial family issues and circumstances as "healed" or things that God has brought us "through". And yet, in our moments of sharing, realizing there are burdens associated with that - that we continue to carry. Not that we will ever forget things that have happened - but that the Spirit is opening up to each of us the fact that we are still "defining" ourselves, and naming ourselves out of those wounds - which is not his best for us.
We closed reading Psalm 103- and praised God that he remembers we all are but dust -- but loves us mightily, and pours blessing and benefit on that dust!
Love to you
Shawna, Karin, Sharon
We can´t tell you how much we´re getting from this study! Our group (of 2) talked about the difference btween positive thinking out of our own effort (leaving us tired & leading to an explosive moment).. and truth thinking out of God´s Word (helping us rest in His presence & truth). I love how we´re facing all our thoughts & telling them where they belong so we can really stand ourselves on life-giving roots.
Loving this study with Jennifer, she is so very beautiful physically and spiritually..... I have a REAL problem with accountability partners, I confided a very personal and potentially hurtful situation to my pastors wife, and she in turn shared it in the most negative light she could to everyone who would listen, and this included the youth pastor's wife who promptly shared it with her family (including teenagers) at the dinner table who promptly shared it throughtout the yourth group who promptly shared it with their friends at school, who promptly ..... need I say more. We did not move although that might have been easier. I stayed in the church seeking restoration for 4 months but I became a pariah to my friends and family in the church. The good note, God bless His Holy Name healed us and continues to work in my family in wonderous ways, there are still ripples and gossip (some people never get enough) and random people still ask weird questions (this must be making you all curious sorry). I struggle with forgivness if I relate it too much so enough said... God bless them....JUST BE CAREFUL who you share with and if you are confided in consider the HOLY TRUST put in you and beware because God is near the broken and contrite of heart.
Shalom
Oh I forgot in my raving soap box the say:
My deepest conviction currently is to rise early 5 am and be before the Lord during this time, we are always very late to bed for valid and assorted reasons so this is hard for me, but God doesn't seem to care about my excuse He daily convicts me for this time.
My triggers are insecurity and a messy house, really, I feel out of control and resentful and my mind tells me all kinds of mean things about the people around me.
Never make discisions or listen to yourself when..
On too much caffien
When hungry
When on your period
When having a bad hair day
When you have just returned from camp, or ladies retreat, or mission trip ect. and the unavoidable trip down the mountain top begins
When you are in a time crunch
When the house is really messy
Shalom
Great study
doing it solo
Judy Heindl
Cottageville WV
We had a wonderful Bible study time Tuesday morning. Discussing emotions to actions revealed some of us deal with or have dealt with co-dependency, which is the epitome of “thinking with our feelings”. We shared that sometimes we resent what we’ve let our feelings get us into—taking on a chore, running an errand, or accepting a commitment we didn’t really want but said yes to for fear of disapproval. Two of us discussed our defining circumstance and the discussion turned pretty serious. However, it allowed for some venting and some encouragement from our sisters in Christ. Some recurrent convictions discussed involved soap operas and book choices. And for our last assignment, we each have a “study buddy” now. Yea!! We’re really enjoying this time together and this Bible study.
Well, I am totally bummed! I previewed your video, Beth, took down the suggested points to discuss, came up w/a couple of points to work into those discussion questions, prepared my home for our meeting, and NO ONE SHOWED UP!!! Now, I realize it is summer and everyone has stuff going on. But the night before was our monthly Bunko night, I was hostess, and NO ONE SHOWED UP! Seriously trying NOT to take this personally. I'm kinda ramroding a church-wide swim party tonight....if no one shows up, I'm gonna lock myself away in my house - just me and Jesus....and maybe I'll let my husband in...sometimes.
West Texas Girl
Judie
First I just have to say that God is way in our business this summer! Kudos to Jennifer for listening to God and putting this intense study together. We have been so convicted by it and will be so blessed for it!
1. We discussed the path we take from emotion to action. We found that one major emotion we react to is our hurt feelings. We think all kinds of thoughts when our feelings are hurt...a lot of them downright lies. We then act upon these thoughts in not so wonderful ways.
2. One of the shared headwater topics in our group was a former spouse. Many issues flow from the dissolved marriage because there is a child involved and therefore the spouse still remains a force to be reckoned with . Issues such as anger, resentment, jealousy, and fear.
3. In our discussion of current sins God is calling us to deal the topics were pride, being judgmental and a lack of tithing. We discussed how sometimes it's hard to discern what measure God wants us to take. How we need to have faith like the woman with the issue of blood that if we will just reach out and touch Him we will be healed. How enlisting prayer from friends is crucial to bring the wisdom we need. A great transition into question 4…
4. We definitely see a need for accountability. Examples were shared of going to someone in our Bible Study group who you know has dealt with what you are now going through and seeking their advice and prayer. Being in contact with each other and open with each other so that when the enemy is lying to you a sister can say that's the enemy.
Obstacles to accountability: Past betrayals, shyness, fear of being judged, and pride.
Solutions: Pray that God will show you the right person to confide in. Start with some small things you need to work on to build the confidence. Just do it!
Connie, Melanie, Nikki, Sharon and Pam
Dublin, VA
1. When I think with my feelings, I am their slave when I am angry. This causes problems for me.
3. My most recurrent conviction has been thinking bad words when I am not happy with the way things are going. I am asking God to help me when it's a rough situation.
4. I have a friend named Saundra that I meet with or talk on the phone with weekly. We meet for about an hour to go for a walk and talk about life and all of it's glories and trouble. At the end of our time, we take turns praying for the needs the other person has mentioned. It really lightens the load.
Life is humbling me to see that my circumstances are only temporary. Appear to be a "big talker" in front of others. But know who I am in my darkest moments when life brings you to your knees especially when alone with just my thoughts. I cry out to God Most High to God, who fulfills (his purpose) for me. Psalm 57:2
We had a great time together, where we can be open and share what's really on our mind. We taked about being accountable for each other even after we finish this study. That we can always talk to each other and know that it will not go anywhere.
Heather
Ashley
Mandy
Carolyn
Rochester, MN group checking in after our get-together last night -- just four of the 11 were able to attend. Some group members are finding it hard (some even prefer to ignore them altogether!) to dig into their emotion/thought patterns; others are being convicted deeply. Our defining circumstances reflect very old hurts -- we all want healing! Two of us have accountability partners and were able to share how much growth in faith those relationships have fostered -- trust and time are primary factors that make accountability relationships work. I thank God for that person in my life!
I loved watching the magic unfold last night at the Tulsa Soul Siesta’s gathering. The discussion revealed the depth and beauty of our souls that only godly women are blessed with. Sharing our defining circumstance and identifying our feelings really helped us remember just how BIG our God is! Additionally, many of us have experienced firsthand how the Lord provides us with friendships as accountability partners...and have come to realize the healing power of unconditional love, patience, and acceptance those friendships may bring forth. Last but certainly not least, we were also blessed with some very, very wise ‘wife to wife’ advice that I’m quite sure most of our young wives will be testing out this week in order to get their husband’s to complete the honey do list! :) Go in Peace…
Judy and I met this morning. We are finding many places our thought closet need a good cleaning. Insecurity, unworthyness, and self doubt. Thanks for keeping us in the Word this summer. Our church does not have a summer Bible Study.
Judy and Susan
Norfolk, Va
Our group was small last night for lots of different reasons, so there were only 3 of us last night, and as we have known each other for years, our conversations were a little more in-depth than what I'm comfortable sharing. However, as we talked about the 'emotion-thought-action chain' track we talked about how there have been times that when we went directly from emotion to action and skipped the thought altogether, and usually ended up with undesirable results! Sometimes the mess took quite a while to clean up. I know that may have been a little off track, but it also lead us into a discussion about accountability and how important it is to have someone you can trust to keep you honest; someone who will remind you of God's truth when you've been blinded by the enemies lies. We also talked about Ps 46:10 (Be still and know that I am God) and what it means, and how do you get still enough to hear God? One of the girls shared that her favorite phrase is 'Let go Let God' which I had never heard but liked.
This is the first time I've done a study with long-time friends, and while we're all finding it difficult on many levels, we all feel God's hand in this and are amazed at His timing!
We're looking forward to Weeks 5 & 6.
Judy in Oswego
For me, I have found someone after a long while, who was an answer to specific prayer that God would give me a close friend, in my area/town. We met and almost instantly it was like we were sisters. As I have grown these past two years, she has been with me through thick and thin. It is amazing to see how much we have been able to help each other during times of such difficulty. And rejoice with each other in the "dancing in the streets" moments (like King David danced in the street before the Lord)
I know she won't read this, but Cindy Beecher has been such a blessing. She holds me accountable and asks the hard questions. I have been able to be open with her, even when it is hard to. And I have been learning how to ask the tough questions of her. (I tend to shy away from that, being a people pleaser!!!)
Cindy is someone who I know will keep my confidence, after I have been betrayed so many times, I know the value of that. I don't like being exposed, but I know that if things are brought into the light, God will be able to help me with them. Praise God she has been able to be that open with me as well. Its a hard learning process, but I know that God honors it!
Thank you for this study, Beth. It has been a blessing more than you know!
Heather,
Solo in Mosinee, WI
there is so much to glean from this study that our group feels like we will be spending more time with these concepts, even after the official study time has ended. there are just too many good practices to enact to let them slip our memories just to stay on schedule.
that being said, we 4 from cumming, ga, were really impacted by the idea that our feelings are NOT our thoughts.
susan shared that she realized that she doesn't often acknowledge the thought that initiates the feeling, but that she skips right over the thought, concluding incorrectly that the feeling is the thought. we all agreed with her on this, and had some examples from the past 2 weeks to share to highlight this.
we are also becoming more and more aware of how crucial Scripture verse memory is to the battle! we have all experienced warfare recently, and some were wondering why God allows it. we had two conclusions to this question.
1) God isn't allowing it. We are allowing it by choosing to believe the lies in our thought closets and follow them through to negative actions with the accompanying consequences.
2) God is allowing them, because His purpose in our lives is to get us to seek Him. He lets us experience the consequences of our wrong choices in hopes that we'll admit our need for Him. He never forces His way in, though.
this hasn't been short, but the lessons are so rich that being concise in a briefing about them is almost impossible! thanks for bringing this study to our attention. we are all benefiting so greatly from it.
our friend who has struggled with bulimia has entered counseling, and we are rejoicing with her about how God brought a Christian counselor into her situation.
I'm sorry, this has absolutely nothing to do with the MM&L's study.
This has to do with the Life Today broadcast today.
Sister HOPE Moore,
Yes, you have given me, another former bottom-of-the-pit resident HOPE.
I'm banking on God giving you such a name! Or maybe one even better....
We had another GREAT time together doing this study. We discussed each question and we trusted each other to open up and share some hard things. But isn't that what it is about. I am always so guilty in sitting back and saying how I wish my life was perfect like so and so. You know when we open up and share we become real and we learn that no one is perfect except God. I like real women!!! Makes you feel normal! :)
Emily
Mechanicsville, VA
Our group from Gateway Community Church, a church plant that meets on a state university campus in Slippery Rock, PA, has really enjoyed going through this study together this summer. There are 14 of us from all walks, ages, experiences, backgrounds of life and it’s been a great time of connection and community building for the women of our body. Last night, we had a great discussion over Weeks 3 & 4 of our study. We spent quite a bit of time discussing our feelings and how greatly they play a role in our relationships, the value of accountability, and some of our “predominant issues” in life. It was a special time of sharing…particularly on the third item as we had a couple of women in our group open up about some deeper and more sensitive issues that they are currently working through. We look forward to continuing to clean out our thought closets as we move into Weeks 5 & 6 of study!
A little rap from the Bible Study "Babes" in Springfield, MO.
5-6-7-8: Holla!
Me, Myself, and Lies is what we folla'.
Yo, Bethie we're here
to tell ya 'bout our fears.
Satan tells us lies
and sometimes makes us cry.
We're stepping out in faith
To claim our rightful place.
Like the woman with the flo,
We need our faith to grow!
We recognized our triggers,
And we know that God is bigger.
To keep our closets from the fire,
We're kickin' out that big fat liar!
Word to the Father!!!!!
Have been going solo and am a little behind. But one thing I noticed as I have been working on week 4 - I have a way to clean out my thought closet and didn't even know it as such. When I have been bombarded by thoughts whether those brought on by emotion or injected by the enemy, it is very obvious I am under attack in some form. In those times, I will pray that God would remove any thought that is not of Him and almost instantly my mind clears completely. So it is obvious how many thoughts I have that don't come from Him.
I do have an accountability partner. She is my best friend, Jeanne. We make a point of telling each other what we need to hear, not necessarily what we want to hear.We can also pour our hearts out to each other without fear. This relationship is priceless to me.
A solo siesta..
1. As for the discussion about emotions leading to thoughts leading to actions, Jennifer’s example of waking up from a dream happened to me the day I worked that part of the study. Weird, I know. I had a dream that I was so mad at my husband for something (can’t remember what) and when I woke up I really was feeling a lingering sense of wanting to strangle him, but with no idea why?? :) Which led to me being a grouch to him for no reason whatsoever. Poor guy.
I often struggle with apathy or numbness. That can so quickly lead to a thought like “I am distant from God and He doesn’t want to talk to me when I’m like this” which leads to avoiding Him. Pretty interesting. I also noticed HOW MUCH I am driven to make decisions based on my feelings. It seems I operate like this all the time.
2. I feel like I have quite a handful of defining circumstances. One is that when my family left a church when I was a child, I remember a close Aunt telling me (8 yrs old at the time) that I was evil and wasn’t allowed to play with my cousins because our family had “left the Lord’s table.” That has always haunted me and made me struggle for years to believe that the Lord Jesus has indeed saved me! (Not just her comment, but coming out of a cult-like group with some whack theology) It caused countless spiritual issues like believing the Lord feels the same way about me, angry at me. Conditional love. Also struggling with a sense of needing to prove myself to others as genuine, etc.
3. My most recurrent conviction for a little over a year now has been to be daily on my knees and face in a time of prayer to the Lord, to bring my heart to Him. I can spend hours in the study of God’s Word but for some reason, this kind of prayer and speaking out loud to Him is intimidating to me. It seems to prove what I really believe about God. It has been a long road so far of stumbling but the past week or so I have had victory in beginning the early morning first thing just talking with the God of the universe. (Wow.) It is exciting to experience the fruit of it.
3. I have two close girlfriends with whom I walk very closely spiritually. But specifically I don’t know that we hold each other accountable. I feel like we listen to what eachother shares but we don't dig very much beyond that. What holds me back from accountability is, I guess, a sense of independence. As ugly as it is, maybe I don’t really want to let the thing go so I don’t really want anyone asking me about it. Or maybe it’s because I just want the freedom to work it out on my own without any help. I think I don’t need the body when that’s exactly what I need! Also I don’t feel like I have ever seen this exemplified to me well. I still find myself wondering what accountability should look like?
Anyway, hope this isn’t too long. :) This study has been so rich. Love to all the other siestas out there and thanks for sharing your hearts! God is working.
Hi Dearest Teacher,
I have a deep dark confession to admit to: My puppy dog really has eaten my homework. I feel as though I am admitting to my high school teacher an assignment that I avoid doing. She took it upon herself to help herself to my tastey "Me, Myself and Lies" book while I was tending to a brokenhearted five year old. And let me just tell you that she devoured the book in its entirety. I just stood there and cried. Then desperately tried to piece meal it together. I couldnt tell one mushy slobbed chunk from the next and anything that was written on now was a pure mess. Then a wonderful breeze came up and blew it all into the yard. So this is my end to a wonderful day teaching 5 year olds at VBS today. As a mommy of puppies I am sure you can relate. It is hard to yell at her sweet cute face. The only saving grace is that she didnt eat my NIV bible that I so love and have many notes written in. It was as though a shield of protection was around the real "WORD". :) So as I try hard to find another book just keep me in your prayers. I have so enjoyed it so far. I still have several videos to watch. I love her videos that go along with the book. I will try to eventually catch up. With much love and puppy breath. Your loyal and devoted student: Patty Vandergrift of King, NC
Sola siesta
I've been convicted for quite some time now - meaning scripture has been thrown in front of me from various venues - on the power and evil of the tongue. I do have a problem with saying things I shouldn't, and have hurt people's feelings, so I'm trying to work on that - figuring out why I say the things I do, and apologize to those whose feelings I have hurt. Trying to memorize verses that will help me, but am not a good memorizer.
I don't have an accountability partner. I grew up with no friends, have never really had close friends. Solitary, silent - that's me. I have a real hard time trusting someone else. Could it me because I have said things I shouldn't have - and knowing that how can I trust that others won't also?
Well this was a tough week. We are both dealing with this stuff...hard. Meaning it is hard to deal with...AND we are taking it on and with the grace of God and each other beating our "stuff" into the submission of God's will in our lives. There were more than a few tears.
We are sooooo relating to thinking with our feelings and are so glad we have husbands who for the most part, don't. Because our lives would be utter chaos if both of us were doing the thinking with our feelings at the same time in the same household. Also, we discovered (or actually put into words for the first time) that sometimes we "act" the way we do so tht someone KNOWS how we're feeling. (Can you say DRAMA and PITY??)
One of us is dealing with the issue of perfectionism. It is pervasive. You can't accept failure from yourself, so why in the world would you be lenient with your spouse, your children, your co-workers.....Everyone, everything, all the time. And it just makes you weary and so tired of being condemning.
The other of us is dealing with discipline issues or shall we say the lack of discipline. Physical, spiritual, emotional, financial...you name it. It is a lack of control over the things we want to control and knowing that we need to give it over to God.
I could go on, as did our study for almost 3 1/2 hours for just us two.
Like I said, we're dealing with stuff, we're being vulnerable, we're keeping each other accountable, we're cheering each other on.
Man this is tough.
Melana and Heidi
Sheridan Wyoming
We met tonight (Wednesday) and had a hard time jumping into the deepest of questions at first. But the last question really caused us to consider. Do we have someone to keep us accountable? And on some levels, we could say yes. But mostly, the answer was "Not really. I want that." We discussed how we tend to have a bunch of shallow relationships and not so many deep ones. We prayed together and asked God to help us be more open. It was a good night!
BLESS Jennifer!!
Oh, dear Beth what an amazing venue you offer us through your post and studies such as Jennifer's- we need to thank Amanda more often for her "divine" inspiration that this blog would be a blessing- very seldom is there an opportunity to share our hearts without anyone judging us- life is just plain tough- I'm solo and a contemplative of sorts, so I want to share that your lessons are beyond anything I ever expected God to share with me- what a infusion of intellect, skill and heart dear sister- Lots of blessings to you and yours and please know I dearly appreciate your extraordinary ministry- how in the world do you do it?- I realize it is through the Holy Spirit, but my goodness, each lesson is fresh and a direct flow from the Holy Spirit-but I know you "plow" the soil with great effort in order to bring us the hope of our Lord- I do NOT take for granted your commitment and call- I'm privileged to be blessed by you, your precious family and staff-We may never meet on this side of heaven, but I do know you have been a part of my healing and helping me turn the pages of the book of my life, I hope to be able to share one day that my life has been redeemed in the land of the living- Lots of love!
Well well well! You don't pull any punches, do you Mama Siesta?
"G' head, confess your sins to each ah-tha"!
We meet every week and have 12 women in our group, but who shows up each week varies, due to summer schedules. We have been averaging 5 per week. This influences how freely we share...
Last week we really had a great discussion chapter 3, as we talked about our island (p. 71). We discovered that we all shared two answers: 1. I'm fat; 2. no one likes me/I'm so lonely.
What an eye-opener! We gave each other affirmation and spoke TRUTH over each other. We discussed that we must NOT let our weight issue (LIE) determine our self-worth. How can a room full of women get together and feel lonely? Ooo, that sneaky devil! We committed to showing love to each other!
This week we had some women join us for the first time. Another crazy thing, out of 7 women, FIVE forgot to bring their book!
Sin many of us deal with: bitterness. We shared about that and how to deal with it. REALLY good and practical words!
Some gems of wisdom pointed out:
"We have heard Satan's voice for so long that we often just assume it is our voice." (p.83)
"To accept lies is to reject truth." (p. 85)
"The enemy goes for the solitary and the silent." (p.88)
Doesn't that last one go hand in hand with the lie that no one likes us?!?
This study is creating an army of warrior women in our church! Lies are being exposed! Truth is being revealed! Hallelujah! What a Savior! He keeps saving us from ourselves!
Our memory verse this week is Psalm 145:18-19
(Last week was 2 Corinthians 4:18)
We LOVE you Beth and Jennifer!
Jillian
Laramie, WY
Through all this, I realized something about myself. I am an emotionally driven individual. My emotions dictate the outcome of my thoughts and actions, maybe not every time, but most.
Last week, I heard that my brother from our beaver cleaver family had been arrested for serious drug charges and I spiraled down into the dumps. I yielded to it and let my flesh feel exactly what it wanted to feel, think exactly what it wanted to think, say exactly what it wanted to say and …thus, I acted it out.
I wanted the house as dark as I could get it. I wanted nothing to do with the Light and anything else that the outside world had to offer. I didn’t feel like praying, so I didn’t. I didn’t feel like answering the phone, so I kept my headset loud. I didn’t feel like going to church, so I didn’t. It was weird.
The LORD, finally broke through my darkness after four days and began to work on me. Here’s a synopsis of what HE said, “You made the wrong choice.” He revealed what should have been my self talk, thus revealing my unbelief. I knew better.
Ro. 5:3 “Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance…”
Phil. 4:4 “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!”
1 Pet 4:13 “But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”
At some point, I turned on every instrument of praise in my house. Every room had ‘The Message’ blaring loud and clear. And doesn’t it say that HE inhabits the praises? Praise HIM. I snapped out of it and began to search for answers.
First answer, the wrong choice is called sin. So, I had to repent. I realized something...when I made the choices I made, I kindly escorted God off the throne and put myself on it. His thoughts, His feelings, His words and His guidance ceased to have meaning. And my thoughts, feelings, words and actions ruled the roost. I'm no theologian, but isn't that one of the ten commandments? Graven image, idolatry kind of stuff?
And, glory to God, when I picked up "Me, Myself and Lies" again—He spoke! And through a story about a little girl playing ‘I Spy’ on an airplane during a tumultuous time, I learned to play the same game in my topsy turvy life. I was challenged by Jennifer to play ‘I Spy’ of all things. It wasn’t easy. I didn’t think there was anything noble, admirable or excellent about the matter. I even had to go to the original language and study synonyms before some of the answers came to me. Here’s the results:
I spy something true because: now my family can speak openly and honestly about my brothers’ drug problem.
I spy something honorable because: my brother is a son of the KING.
I spy something right because: it is for his own good that he follow the law of the land and God.
I spy something pure because: he will be forced to detox and be free from defilement and impurities.
I spy something lovely (pleasing) because: he is alive.
I spy something of good repute (admirable, praiseworthy and appealing) because: (this one was hard) God’s reputation in His child will not go unnoticed and God’s grace in this and every situation is praiseworthy. We don’t get what we deserve.
I spy something excellent because: of my brothers’ potential under Christs’ control is enormous.
PRAISE THE LORD~SORRY IT'S SO LONG
Thank you. I lost sleep last night worrying that someone would see that post... Guess that could be an object lesson from our study huh? I let my hurt feelings get the better of me and posted out of emotion rather than wisdom. Then I let my worry carry me away rather than take captive my thoughts.... Oh how God is molding me!
Solo
1. Thinking w/ my feelings is something the Lord has been working on w/ me for several years and I am now experiencing a great measure of victory. This study is raising my awareness level even more and helping me seal up some frayed edges that still linger from time to time. I am so grateful.
2. My 'defining circumstance' is too personal to share, but praise God it is gradually defining me less and less.
3. This also is too personal to share but God & I are dealing with it. Hallelujah!
4. In childhood & as an adult, I have been deeply betrayed more than once, so this is hard for me.
Hey Beth! I'm not quite caught up to you, but needed a truth injection this morning, so I "pre-watched" your instructions for weeks 3 and 4 just as I am finishing up week 1. Just wanted to say that while I was watching I hit the button on my next cup of coffee for the morning, and sat back down in front of my screen just in time to hear your tirade ( yes that's what it was! ) about caffeine!! I don't know when I have laughed so hard, out loud, sitting alone in my house, than I did after your husband-leaving tips. And people say Bible teachers never give practical advice! Thanks for being up in my business today. Love, Ginger in Pensacola (haven't logged on before, but oh well, I'm out here nonetheless.)
From the "Me, Myself, & My Siestas" group of 25:
This lesson touch many of us very deeply. Our answers to the questions weren't simple or short, so I'll just leave some general comments here, rather than answers to all questions.
"We as humans erroneously think that our heart should be our guide and therefore we do some pretty stupid and damaging things in the name of love."
"It is so refreshing to see with this study how my feelings are controlling my actions and I am seeing how much of my “circumstances” are thus created by those same feelings!"
Fear, rejection, and procrastination were all listed this week as defining circumstances. This lesson brought them to the forefront and caused us to take action.
p. 87: “Never let the Enemy be more aware of your weaknesses than you are.”
This seemed to be a wakeup call to many of us. One Siesta said, "BAM! This one hit me right in the nose! Wow! That little stinker had me pegged on this one, but no more! The jig is UP!! I will no longer allow satan to use my weaknesses against me by seeing them come up before I do! I see it first, and that gives me the opportunity to speak truth over it! HA!"
Many of us have friends we consider our accountability partners, but one Siesta wrote something that mirrored my own personal thoughts two years ago:
"No accountability partner...scared to death to take that step..."
We're all still working at cleaning out our thought closets. So many years of piling junk in there...too bad we can't hold a garage sale to get rid of it all at once!
Solo siesta.
This has been THE hardest Bible study I've ever done. And I know it's one that I needed the most. There have been times, where I just couldn't continue because it was so hard, God is confronting my biggest secrets, fears, that have been growing in my mind. So many times I just would shove my book aside and just weep and pray before I could continue. And I need to let y'all know that God is so good and so loving. He's doing an amazing thing in me. Praise His holy name!
Jennifer wrote: "Without wisdom we act emotionally, think with our feelings, and don't recognize the truth - with catastrophic results." That has been me for many, many years. But God is changing the patterns of my thinking. And I'm so grateful to Him for that. I started praying for wisdom couple years ago, when my girls turned teenagers. And God sure has made a difference in our relationship!
Re accountability, I wish I had an accountability partner. But so far it has not worked out. Maybe I've moved too much in my life. And then there's the trust issue. It's hard for me to trust someone that I don't know well. But I'll keep praying, I'm sure God has someone in mind for me to be accountable to. But for now, I'm taking it to Jesus!
Feel very blessed,
Meggie, Winnipeg, Canada
We're deep into grandbabies and weddings in our group this summer so enjoyed passing pictures and sharing stories before getting down to business. Great discussion, tears over some our defining circumstances, many feelings of frustration at situations that don't change and the paralyzing results. We spent time looking at Scripture that spoke to God's faithfulness and our faith. Cleaning our closet is definitely work but we're rejoicing in the One who is guiding the broom. Several of us wrote down Bible study group when asked to provide an accountability partner. We're adding accountability issues along with our weekly prayer requests. We are so in love with each other we couldn't imagine choosing just one to hold us accountable. Hope it works!!
Love this study, love all of you,
Sandy for the Ames Joy group
Hey Siestas,
We had a great meeting yesterday. We focused a lot on Question 1. The thing we talked about was not what is the thought that follows the emotion, but "what is the thought that precedes the emotion?" Sometimes this thought is so fast it appears non-verbal, but often this is the cause of the negative emotion. We talked about how to stop and evaluate our thinking and page back, as it were, to the original thought that caused the negative emotion. Then, to subject THAT thought to scrutiny: Does it line up with the Word of God? Then to replace that thought, usually a lie, with a truth from the Word.
We also talked a lot about repentence and taking responsibility for our sins, but with the SURE HOPE given us in 1Jn 1:9. Also recognizing that we are ALREADY blameless in His sight, from an eternal perspective (Jude 24). This is what gives us the confidence to FACE OUR SIN and truly agree with God.
Learning to think with God's thoughts is going to set us free, AMEN?!
Also, loved Jennifer's page 90 (I think) where she lists which Scriptures she uses to counter the enemy's lies.
Ended with Casting Crowns' "The Voice of Truth." Awesome!
Looking forward to next week!
We had a great meeting this week over decaf coffee and muffins! Tonya and I are becoming more aware and "tuned in" to our thoughts. We've been working on preparing our minds for situations where we know we are tempted to think lies-our weak areas. We want to be more aware of our weaknesses than the Enemy!
I have been most convicted lately of comparing my self to others, which leads thoughts like, "I must not be good enough to have what she has" and list goes on. Also, we discussed how at times we are hesitant of being an accountability partner because it may be hard for us to confront others and possibly hurt their feelings.
Kristin and Tonya
Our group of three met last night. Two things really came out of our time together:
1) We all agreed that our emotion that got us in trouble was anger. We all felt like it reared its ugly head way too often and we took it out on our husbands and children. Each of us believe that our anger stems from our own need for perfection and not being able to control the people around us. (Makes you want to hang out with us, right?!) We all want to see God teach us how to handle our anger, so that we don't become emotionally abusive to our husbands and children. Help us, Lord!
2) The biggest thing we took away last night was our common need for accountability that we can trust. All of us said that we had trouble sustaining deep friendships with women that remained trustworthy. Also, 2 of us are in ministry and/or church staff and people tend to elevate you to a super-spiritual status that is unsustainable. We all feel lonely and long for deep connection with other women. We are all so grateful for each other now. We are a new group and are praying for each other and that God will bless our friendships and teach us how to be accountability partners.
Traci
North Carolina
Pride goeth before a fall....
I want to tell you gals something...When I started this Bible Study, I thought I could help facilitate it to encourage others in their thought life but it wasn't really necessary for me. I pretty much knew who I was in Christ Jesus and have memorized scripture that reminds me how much Jesus loves me and how I was created for God's good pleasure. I also attend Lakewood Church for Heaven's sake!! My faith gets pumped up!! I also am Director of Women's Ministry at my other church so I am constantly pouring God's truth into women to encourage them and let them see themselves as God sees them - the beautiful bride of His only Son - hand picked! I want them to know that they are forgiven, redeemed, the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus! That we are all accepted, appointed, anointed and approved for such a time as this. What I am trying to say is that I have a pretty healthy thought closet - or so I thought......
This past week really challenged me. Even last night at our group gathering the gals said, "Roxanne, you are being awfully quiet. Is everything alright?"
"Heck no it is not allright!" I thought to myself. Momma Siesta suggested that we share our sin issue with you all and that is just not pretty no matter what you do or say!! What is my most recurrent conviction??? Sheesh!!!
The Holy Spirit would not let me off the hook on this one. No way! It was too important and I am too valued by the Creator to not clean my mess up! I finally started sharing about an anger issue that I have. There, I said it again! It was easier than last night. Why? Because I have so been praying about it. I have stopped to think before I reacted and responded to the trigger points that the enemy, that roaring lion, would use to bait me. I will not be his playground for much longer in this area because God is cleaning me up! GLORY!!!
I am soooooooo happy for this study and for the new friends I have made via this blog to bring us together for Bible Study. I LOVE them! And I felt safe to share with them because I know they are faithful to pray for me as I am for them.
Right now the enemy knows where I am weak and vulnerable and he preys on that. He better look out! I am changing for the glory of God.
One of these days, I am going to wake up and get out of bed and be the kind of woman that makes the devil say, "Oh no, she's up again!"
Let it be in the name of JESUS!
Do you remember this song as a little girl??
He's still working on me to make me what I ought to be.
It took Him just a week to make the moon and stars,
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars.
How loving and patient He must be, He's still working on me.
1. There really ought to be a sign upon my heart,
Don't judge her yet, there's an unfinished part.
But I'll be perfect just according to His plan
Fashioned by the Master's loving hands.
CHORUS:
2. In the mirror of His Word reflections that I see
Make me wonder why He never gave up on me.
He loves me as I am and helps me when I pray
Remember He's the Potter, I'm the clay.
CHORUS:
We had a very small group. Just 3 of us. We quickly came to the conclusion, the harder we try to clean out our thought closets and strive for a better way of life with the Lord, THE MORE SEVERE THE ATTACKS BY THE ENEMY HAVE BECOME ON EACH OF US! Giving up this study has crossed my mind, especially after the nasty party Satan threw about two hours before our group meeting. I was the guest of dishonor and it was UGLY. And I am so ashamed to say that I responded in an even uglier way. So much for my progress. I am not giving up! I had an epiphany that if Satan was this desperate and vicious, I must be doing something correctly and that I HAVE to hang in there. From reading "Streams in the Desert" and James 1: 2-5 I am trying to view these attacks as works designed to increase my perserverance and ultimately give blessing.
Six of us were present last night, and we had a great time of discussion. This study is helping us to open up, be vulnerable and honest in our small group.
1. We agreed that as women we tend to think with our feelings which usually end up with us feeling frustrated and hurt.
A member of our group shared her progression:
Emotion: hurt feelings
Thought: nobody likes me
Action: crying, exchange of hurtful words, escalation of emotions
If we go by our feelings and react by our feelings all the time, we decided we'd be in a funk all of the time! One of us shared that she has been trying to talk about her feelings as they occur instead of holding them in until something small and unrelated causes a large explosion of emotion. We all agreed facing our emotions and dealing with them instead of thinking with them is how we want to live.
2. None of us wanted to share a defining circumstance. Maybe we are still coming to grips with them ourselves and just weren't ready to let everyone else know.
We all were touched by the story of the little girl and her dad on the airplane. We agreed we tend to look at the negative, and all had already decided to be aware and pray the Holy Spirit makes us aware when that happens. We want to see the good!
3.The majority of us have really felt conviction over the need to muzzle our mouths! We are being convicted to watch what we are saying. We realize now we must acknowledge our weaknesses in order to be alert and stay ahead of the enemy.
4. Some of do have people we are accountable to and some of us need someone. We discussed how it makes us vulnerable to share private things with someone. Will they really keep our confidence? Are we willing to keep someone's confidence in return? Do we have time to confide in someone or do we make the time? We tended to agree that a big fear of being accountable to someone is that we don't want to hear that we may be wrong or we need to change something in our life.
The study is great, and I believe our group is really doing some cleaning out of our thought closets. All of us brought in stained and/or torn clothing from our closet to share...and we all brought great excuses of why those stained/torn things are still in our closet! With our thought closets we need to throw out the stained and torn things along with the excuses for keeping them!
Karen
Hartselle, AL
Last night we gathered and as one of our Siesta's already wrote took Beth's prompting to open up with our latest conviction. Confessing is tough stuff. But it's also cathartic. And more than that, it brings things in the Light for the Holy Spirit to do His thing. We were a small group last night, but those of us who were there were really touched. I mean REALLY touched. Thank you Father that You have each of our numbers!
Roxanne Worsham's Group
Houston Texas
We spent almost the entire time unpacking our thought closet as it relates to that defining circumstance. Two of us knew what our circumstance was and another thinks she figured it out that nioght just discussing with us. Awesome!
Jane, Jennifer and Lindy
Houston, TX
Our group was amazed at how a lot of our triggers are food related! Too much chocolate, not enough chocolate, caffeine, etc. It's probably a deeper issue there, BUT anyway. We decided that we're not going to play the blame game and let others/our emotions/food control us. We're going to let God take control!
-Kirsten for the Harrisburg, PA group
Just a second to post a few thoughts. We have 2 groups running and I am leading both. Our morning has been hit and miss by our ladies. But we met nonetheless. Our evening group will not be meeting until next Tuesday due to our VBS this week. I just couldn't ask ladies to make a choice to not participate in VBS or Bible Study.
Here were some of our thoughts:
We liked the thinking with our feelings comments. We could all relate when our monthly moodies ruled our mouths, hearts and minds.
Almost unanimously our one defining circumstance invoved something that made us look at ourselves through low self-esteem. It affects so much of our lives because we use the I feel this so this action must mean I am right. We are all diet conscious, either working on healthy eating or dieting. Satan knows what our weak points are. He will use them to find our weaknesses. Some of the ladies do have at least 1 accountability partners if you count their husband. We got into a discussion abut the importance of memorizing God's word so that we have that to combat Satan's temptations.
More with the second group next Tuesday night.
(I have to tell you Beth, you looked really good on the video.)
Ok so this is loosely tied to the study but I think you will see how it fits. So stick with me. I have been thinking about the whole thought life thing and being joyful. I was reading in an unrelated book about how we have to practice joy. Now this really caught my attention because I have been praying for joy for years. Also for years my hubby has been telling me to count my blessings when I am down or having a pity party, etc. Now I never put the two together and realized that this was practicing joy or thinking on right things. I just knew it worked. Anyway, today I was thinking about how we are not suppose to be letting the false thoughts in, only truth and I realized that when we dwell only on others criticisms of us and not what they see as our strengths(this also includes things that God say that are good about us) we are not practicing joy. We in fact are practicing the opposite. While they may have a valid point in that we need to improve in that area, they are not saying that is the sum total of who we are. My hubby says that if we are feeling guilty and it does not move us to change, which would be God at work, then it is most likely the enemy condemning us. this is because Godly guilty motivates us to change toward more God like behavior. I found this so encouraging once I put all the pieces together. While God gives us joy we need to be practicing it. Not expecting that He will do all the work and let us dwell on the things that cause us to be discontented. Now I am not saying that we should not be discontent with sin in our lives, we should and that would fall under the whole Godly guilt thing. But there is so much out there that just brings us down and that we slam ourselves with. I hope that I am making some sense here. I also hope that someone finds this concept as encouraging as I have.
Kim B. in AZ
1. I tend to get mad when I'm tired and trying to finish "mom" jobs. I go from tired, to self-pity, and if I'm not careful, a mom-style tantrum. Hard to admit that, but it's true. Happy to say that I don't go "tantrum" too often and recognize when I'm headed there. This study has helped me see the bad stuff in my thought closet and replace it with God's thoughts. I already recognized my weakness in this area and that's why I decided to memorize scripture this year with LPM.
2. My defining circumstance at the moment would have to be my son's food allergies. I don't resent the allergies and I love my son with no end. This is God's plan in our lives and that's how it is. It's all the hard work of making almost everything he eats.. and then cleaning up the kitchen. We can't use a dishwasher because my son was reacting from "contaminated" dishes and silverware from minute particles left over. Needless to say, I get physically, mentally drained from time in my kitchen (aka my "office").
3. My most recent conviction.. I'm a recovering perfectionist and I thought I should keep my kitchen "perfect"... but not at the expense of my family. A pile of dirty dishes are not as important as the time spent with my husband and 2 sons. I'm happy to say I left dishes to take my boys on a bike ride on more than one occasion this week :).
4. I struggle with having an accountability partner. My husband is a great for this role. I also realize I need a siesta as well. I'm an only child and have found this particularly difficult for me to open up enough to get an accountability partner. I'm praying on this one.
Hi Beth,
This is late but only because life is so busy right now. But not too busy to get together with my "siestas". This past week's get together was so good. We are all struggling with keeping up with our study but we are forging ahead. This past week's time together was so good for us. As a ministry team, it gives us an opportunity to get past the "business" and get to really know each other...what make us tick, what makes us who we are! It has been good and I am so grateful that God led us to this study as a team. Thank you for your ministry...we love ya!
Shawna Hakes
Williamsport, PA
I wanted to post about a wonderful idea we had for our last group meeting. I am hoping that I am not too late for this to get read by someone. When I was a middle schooler my Mema gave me a glass jar in the shape of a bear. In the jar were scriptures with little handwritten notes just for me. I had a difficult time growing up and I struggled a ton with insecurity (I still do now but God is making it better everyday). Mema gave that jar so that when I was having a hard time I could go and pull out one of those notes to be reminded of God's word and the truth I should be thinking.
Using that same idea our group each created our own jar of truths. We wrote down scriptures for each other and for ourselves so that when the enemy is at our thought closet door we will have scripture to shut him down. That truth jar my Mema gave has always been such an encouragement to me especially now that she is in heaven with Jesus.
I just thought other groups might like the idea too. It will help to replace thoughts in our closet with truth and to encourage each other.
Love you guys,
Candy Smith
Houston, TX
Sandee and Mary....
Daughter and Momma...
Folsom/North Highlands, Ca
We are loving this bible study...thank you for hosting it. I am through week four, but momma is still working on week four. We "meet" via email and go over the discussion questions.
Blessings from CA.
Two Siestas and hubbys have just conquered the ALCAN both ways! We are Mile 0 Dawson Creek, and the whole way kept true to our SSBS!
We've had great difficulty with WIFI in the Last Great Road Trip, so we are at public library and checking in for weeks 3-4 study.
We pray we will become wiser by monitoring our thoughts and checking our actions. We hope we will consistently become wiser as we actively seek God's wisdom. In our 60's we find much of what we do is habitual rather than deliberate! Time to clean out the closet...
Sometimes silence is a great argument but the woman with the issue of blood called out to Jesus. May we do the same.
You have to open up your life to interupption as we re-order our thought closets. And we decided we need to be willing to face the change and be vunerable in order to execute change. Where we have been held captive is a mystery until we have the "Me, Myself and Lies" exposed in the light of God's Word. Jennifer and Beth have done a masterful job in helping expose the lies. We know for a fact the reality of a sensitive accountability partner, and this trip on the Al Can has been used by God to do just that! Loved the tip about insecurity and caffeine being a trigger to grab lies! Thanks to "Siesta Mama" our caffeine is now limited to morning use only....
Much love,
Pam H. and Kathy C.
So Cal. bound Siestas for 2 more weeks...(It's a long way home, still)
1. emotion- feeling abandoned when my former boyfriend and i broke up thought- i MUST find out why action- calling my friends, his friends, and family demanding to know what id done, why he left?
we definitely loved each other; that was known
2. defining circumstance- divorce much earlier in my life; childhood issues that probably really influenced bad husband choice and divorce (along with his issues of lying and adultery)
3. most recurring conviction- keep trusting God to handle my life (He delights over me) and not fixate on worrying or trying to control everything myself; I have truly seen some victory in this area of my life this summer through being a part of this study and esp. the Siesta Memory Verse team this year- that's been MOST helpful!! I also can see though it is DAILY or I can begin to go right back to "stinkin thinkin."
4. My accountability partner- an older Godly woman taking me through a study of Proverbs 31, she wrote. I so appreciate her, and her loving honesty with me.
All these things are slowly bringing great changes to my life. I'm so thankful God is very patient and understanding with us.
Amanda (sol0) Olive Branch, Ms
I can't pinpoint one Defining Circumstance so I am skipping that question.
Recurrent Conviction - I am currently struggling with the conviction of being a bad, out-of-control, disorganized wife and homeschool mom. I am working on it by freeing up my schedule more and focusing on just a few important things than trying to be supermom.
I do not have an accountability partner. Since it came up to get one and started to think about who I could get and sadly I couldn't think of anyone. I have many good friends but none that I think would hold me up to a hard-high standard. I am afraid I would get too much of "That's ok, no one else expects to be like that. We all do things we shouldn't". I feel bad even saying that. They are good christian women but I think we are too comfy in the world and I want to work for something better.
April and Husband - Oldsmar, FL
2. This would be the rape that happened to me as a teenager. All or most of my bondage issues flow from that.
3. What I have been under the most conviction about lately is Acts 10:15. “Do not call anything impure that God has made clean.” God has really made it clear to me lately that I have not believed that I really am clean in Christ even though the appointed time has net arrived to deliver me from bondage. I feel defiled because of idolatry. The enemy knows I feel this way and is using that against me. So that is an area that the enemy has been more aware of one of my issues than I. Praise God for revealing this to me.
I'm doing the study solo but still loving it!
I am working on not "reacting" but instead "acting" based on truth.
I will use "I spy" to help maintain a clean closet.
I will replace gasoline words with water words.
Awake my soul and be WELL!
Love you mama!
I meet alone. Instead of addressing the questions, although they were great, I wanted to add a couple of my favorite quotes from these 2 weeks.
p. 58 A surplus of emotion usually precedes acting without wisdom! Amen sister!
p. 61 To fear God means we esteem His truth more highly than our feelings or perceptions of truth. WOW!
Kimberly
San Antonio
The Moyock Baptist girls met on the deck at sunset (but finished up quickly when the mosquitoes arrived). We had a great discussion of how to know if God is speaking to you and the accountability issue. Very difficult for us to release close issues to anybody but God. We also thought it would be a good idea to get an "easy up light" and a clapper to be able to turn the light on in our closet at all times we feel darkness creeping in (like a lion).
Solo-
Loved Emotion, Thought, Action
so so true. The phrase that has stuck with me here is Faith not Feelings. I've been writing it on sticky notes posting them everywhere. I'm lovin this study thanks for orginizing it and sorry I'm late in posting.
It is amazing how one comment from someone in authority leads to a thought in your thought closet (which is a lie) that can do so much damage. And for 30 years! Did the comment cause the insecurity or did my insecurity cause the comment to grow in my thought closet? Either way it has to be pulled out and destroyed and the space it was taking up filled with God's truth.
This study has come during the right season in my life as I am facing a situation that I feel I could not have given more of myself(job)for the outcome to have been so dramatically different than I could have ever planned. (job loss) Constantly drifting & focusing on this situation in my thoughts and has affected so many areas of my life. Come to the realize can not give so much of myself to one area of my life (job) again. This situation has strengthen my faith to realize all circumstances on this Earth are temporary.
When asked about our defining circumstance we felt this is the same circumstance that led us to faulty assumptions that are hard to break. These deep rooted issues are brought to the surface each time we allow our emotions to guide our thoughts and determine our actions. God's truth is the only thing to conquer this joy robbing cycle. Being aware of our weaknesses is the first big step! The enemy is not all knowing but he does know our past and that is where he tries to "get us" (strongholds)
Each of us feel our recurrent conviction lately is the tongue. We need to "keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth as long as the wicked are in my presence." Psalm 39:1 (NIV)
The fears involved in having accountability partners are betrayal & judgement. However that being said each of us does have an accountability partner. We have partners that will speak the truth in love and we are accountable to do the same for them. It is a blessing to have someone that loves us enough to correct us.
Loving this study!
The So-Cal Gals
Carol, Jeanette, Lisa, & Julie
1. Yes- at church & home - oh they must be mad at me becasue they did not say hi .. so now I am mad at them becasue they have no right to be mad at me....
2. Husband's battle with God...not one but several seasons of our lives ( miscarriages, death, etc.)Yes the I spy something good did speak to us because we tend to spy negative first.
3. negativity, pride, bitterness. Pray & get in the Word to be kept aware of our weaknessess.
4. yes our family (sisters & mom)
1. Thinking with our feelings has been a pretty big issue. Whether with a spouse or kids. We can see how God is changing this though.
2. Defining circumstances: Physical health (lack of!)and how it affects EVERYTHING. Also circumstance that lead to an abortion.
3. Recurrent convictions: People pleasing. Yuck! Watching what we say as well as what we choose to believe that comes from others.
4. Accountability: We are crazy about each other and thankful to God that he has provided the safety of friendship to pray and share in each other's journey. It is a beautiful gift that we do not take for granted.
Nichole and Julie
Marion, Iowa
it's been difficult to get together this time around because my and terry's schedules keep conflicting (i've been out of town a lot), but we finally made it together yesterday! we had a really good discussion following all of your questions and made commitments to each other for accountability. your pointed question about conviction forced us to open up and lay bare, which was very good for us to do. we're new friends, but this study has done so much to help us trust and get to know each other - it's been the perfect setup for being accountable to one another! thanks for giving us this opportunity!
I'm currently not doing the study but after watching the video hope I get to do so in the future. I desperately need an accountability partner in life. I've had some rough experiences previously with respect to that but recognize the importance of having a Godly person speak truth into my life over areas of sin and rough edges. Would you pray that God would bring someone into my life that would help me grow up in Him? I need help. Thanks!
We met on Tuesday night, we've all been trading houses. We didn't get to watch the video, internet was down. We've met every week even if there wasn't a video to keep us all accountable and doing our homework :)
We met on Saturday morning,July 25. We both feel this study is helping us very much. On question one we agree that thinking with our feelins has been a problem for us.Question two regarding our defining circumstances one of us was able to state it clearly and one more vaguely.
The "I spy" idea took with both of us. I had a day of opportunities today to practice that!
As to recurrent conviction lately: We both stated presumption. Confession and asking for help is a plan of action.
We have know each other for 25 plus years and have been accountable to each other. I(Nancy) am blessed with the greatest friend and Christian friend any one could have.Thank you Beth abd all for blessing us.
Nancy/Wi and Elaina/In
For the first time all four of us were together! That itself is a good thing – between business trips and sick babies we’ve had one person absent for each of the two previous meetings, but Tuesday night we were all here! We took a picture and added it to the guest book!
We all agree that we are seeing progress in ourselves as a result of the study. We are not perfect by any means and still have plenty of junk in our closets, but can more easily identify lies, stop ourselves from straying down a negative path, and focus on “what is” rather than “what if”. We all agree in the importance of being still and are working really hard to do just that. “Be still” before reacting. “Be still” before saying anything. Just “be still”.
Unfortunately, however, I for one (and I can say this because I am the post writer and hostess of our group) was sad that our group wasn’t “smack in the middle of each other’s business” (as Mama Siesta put it)! Seriously. Not one of us brought up a single personal example at all during our discussion and come to think of it I think the most personal we’ve been this whole time was our “please pray for me. I…” text from week one! Yikes! I think airing out some of our junk so-to-speak will help us grow and get more out of this study. It will be my prayer that come next meeting I will have the courage to share something personal in the context of our discussion. Perhaps if one of us can do it, others will follow.
Also, none of us have consistent accountability partners (doesn’t seem a stretch does it - seeing our inability/unwillingness to open up). We all see the value in it though and will work on finding someone. Some concerns mentioned were trust issues and concern that our would-be-partner may not hold us to God’s standards instead of the standards of this world.
Your siestas in Bellingham, WA,
Jamie, Jen, Jennifer, and Kristin
This is a seriously hard study - just all in our business - Praise the Lord! Thank you Jennifer and Siesta Mama for this bumpy ride.
"I spy something good" -
always a choice we have. Difficult situations hinge on perspective. You choose your perspective and can see something as a curse or a blessing.
Last time I flew from Houston to New Orleans, we sat on the runway for 2 hours. I felt totally responsible because I was praying to not fly in the horrific weather that caused the delay. I saw the grounded time as a total blessing as I ALWAYS have a great book to read. Reading on the ground beats turbulence in the sky every time.
3. The tongue.
Before you speak, ask yourself, "is it positive, kind, necessary and true."
4. Accountability. Faith and I have been accountability partners for several years. We met in Bible study 6 years ago and have studied together ever since. This friendship is truly a gift from God, fashioned by his sacred hands. A friendship that stays in the word is the three strands scripture refers to.
For those of you who don't have an accountability sister, move the request to the top of your prayer list. Don't be scared. Trust me, neither of you will ever be perfect and there is not room for condemnation. Support each other, tell the truth, pray, laugh, cry and thank God for the gift of a true sister.
Elaine and Faith
New Orleans, LA
THE OKINAWA GIRLS!
We were jumping up and down when you mentioned us. (Did we mention we miss the good 'ol USA and feel a bit disconnected at times? You made our week! We are a new group of girls here in Okinawa- not the ones from last summer. A few of us did do the Esther series though!)
The big points this week for us:
1. We all struggle with lack of self discipline. A question that Jennifer asked on page 75 resonated with all of us though. It said, "Do you rely on your self-control or the Spirit's control?" This was huge for us to realize we aren't supposed to have the control. We are to rely on the Holy Spirit to give us the control. This was great for this group!
2. We all struggle with accountability partners. The consensus is that the partner should be a very close friend. Because we are military spouses and we move so often we don't make friends as deeply as others because we know they/we will move again soon. We agreed to work on this.
Loving it!
Kris, Kathy, Natasha, Maiko, Melissa
I think the thing what spoke most to our group was figuring out what our "defining circumstance" was and how our thought closets are affected by it. Our circumstances revolve mostly around being wives to Godly men and mothers to several children and how to be who God wants us to be without comparing ourselves to other women. It is easy to think, "I wish I could be more like her," instead of thanking God for who we are.
Also, we are all more aware of how our feelings do play such a huge role in how we think. Realizing which feelings and thoughts are not of God and shutting the door and throwing away the key! Most of those thoughts arise from our own insecurities and trying to please the world, instead of God. Our challenge is realizing those weaknesses ahead of time and covering them in prayer before the enemy gets a chance to throw those flaming arrows!
Marion, Katie and Gina
Georgia and Washington
PS~Sorry I'm behind in posting this :/
We met again via email and are both really enjoying this study.
We both had never really thought about how our emotions lead to a thought then lead to an action; but, it's so true. Emotions can often lead to an action with a negative or unintended outcome.
Our defining circumstances are also similar. We both come from families of worriers and this is also one of our major issues. We are both working on this.
Our recurrent convictions are different. They are putting work before everything else (including God)and muzzling our mouth.
We are both each others accountability partners. We don't want to be silent and solitary.
Love this study!
Leighanne and Jennifer in GA
A couple things for me personally I wanted to add. First, on page 65 where Jennifer says "No, a time comes when you must speak a word to your soul that prompts action resulting in healing." That really hit home with me. We can do all the bible studies and sit in the best of sermons but until I take responsibility for it, make the scripture MINE, for me from MY God, it will do little good. I must speak to my soul. No one else can.
Second, a little thought closet victory. My mind goes south in a hurry if I let it. I tend to do worst case first. So when I was scheduled to have a root canal this past week, I had all kinds of vain imaginations. BUT I had been praying about it for a while and had some godly confidence. As I was thinking of some of the worst cases possible, a thought spoke from my heart to my head- it does not matter what the worst case is. God is bigger than that. He is. Whatever He allows to happen will be for a purpose and His glory. He is bigger than the worst. Peace followed suit.
May seem trivial to some, but it was huge for me!Thanks
Going solo.
I also think this is a hard study to do, I don't want to think about what is in my thought closet.
3. My issue that God has lead me to think on is LOVE as in loving your neighbor as you love yourself.
4. Still working on get some one to have as accountabiltty partner.
Linda
Bartelso, Il
As a solo have not been posting but have to say that the caffeine tip was so funny (and I do not drink coffee)! Was behind on the lessons and got caught up today (the car would not start - needed a new battery - could not go to work until my man brought a new one home) - so, "I spy something good" was time to get caught up today and watch not only the Beth video from Tuesday, but the Jennifer videos along with doing the lessons. For me, my thought closet needs a complete overhaul - am working on it . . . so many of the posts are right where I am at. "No man is an island."
I can't believe it took me this long to respond for my group of New Smyrna Beach Florida siestas! We had a wonderful gathering and we certainly were able to dive deeper into the heart of each and every woman present! The subject that interested me (as the leader) was the one of accountability. It appears that our ladies really don't have what they understand to be accountability and some didn't even think it necessary. We discussed this at great length, uncovering more hidden lies the enemy was trying to get some of us to believe. I encouraged the women to look at accountability as iron sharpening iron and then it started to seem less daunting and less intimidating. It was a wonderful meeting and we all agree we don't really want it to end!
The Bristol VA-TN siestas all met again at a local coffee shop.
We discussed our emotions, thoughts and actions relating to road rage, false assumptions and handling frustrations. Each lead to a negative or unnecessary action unless it was surrounded with prayer. Our road rage girl has begun to "see and communicate" with the Holy Spirit as if he was sitting in the passenger seat when she drives. This is helping her to practice responding to others on the road in a positive, godly way.
Weight, home life growing up, and abuse were discussed as issues that became the headwaters from which other issues evolved. You know, the fact that we were sharing some of these issues is in itself a positive result of doing this study with each other. Trusting others enough not to hurt you later with the information you shared is profound.
Being more organized with my physical and spiritual surrounding was the area that I have felt conviction lately. Through this study itself I am striving to be more consistent. Another member has felt most convicted recently of choosing to be mindful of how she responds while driving. (Shared above.) Another member reminded us of Jennifer's comment on page 86 of the need for our souls to awake and pray.
Accountability: As a group we did feel that we could used each other as accountability partners. Maybe one time it would be one person and for another issue it would be another member, but as a group we could be accountable with each other. We had one person who has an accountability partner at work and the Lord is using this partnership to make her aware of better ways to lead her group without getting angry at being "corrected" herself.
The thought of being accountable to someone is hard especially if you have been burned by others in the church in the past. (Someone who you are accountable with now becomes angry with you later and uses your past struggle against you.) We all agreed that for some issues it must be something that you have felt the Lord's direction to do and for any issue you must be prayerful so that you have a partner that holds you accountable and doesn't just try to make you feel good all the time.
I am so thankful for the beautiful ladies in this group that through this study I have grown closer to. Thanks to everyone involved. You are more of a blessing than you may realize.
We talked about how we all thought our emotions and our thoughts were the same, and how much they influence our actions! Huge! So glad to recognize that!
Beth, our group has 18 women in it. We are experimenting with an online forum format. So far there are positives and negatives--one positive is for the young mom's and young career women who can participate around their schedules; one negative is that there is no one "meeting" time and so very little accountability to a time line. Consequently our group is one week behind your video postings. Still, I have had e-mail feedback that the Lord is doing work in many hearts. I'm not sure I would try this again as a leader or participant but we're going to see it through to the end of this study.
Now thatVacatioin Bible School is over and our night group met, I have to tell you I love being with this group.
1. Thinking with our feelings leads us to some big trouble. We feel a certain way, come home expecting our spouse to undersrtand, he doesn't and then we react to his lack of knowing. It is a vicious cycle.
2. Went everywhere from mouth speaking out in ungodly ways then we react with being displeased with ourselves and wishing we hadn't said things. Food/low self esteem was another area. Wanting to look my best, mad at myself for giving in and then eating myself up and spitting me out for not being good to myself.
3. Most recurrent conviction lately has been our mouth gets us in trouble. We try to keep the tongue tamed. Sometimes, it is a mighty loud lion. Others said that mouth is also their conviction: both what goes in and out. Eat in a Godly way. I feel good about myself and don't usually feel bad or say things I regret a few minutes later. The enemy knows our weakest points. But God knows our strongest points.
4. Most of us know an accoutability partner would be a great thing. But most of us are too insecure and afraid of rejection to set something like this up. We know the good out weights the potentially scarey part. We know our church and women's group would be much more vibrant if we actually held each other accountable. On line with a partner who is distant is much safer. Even on this blog it is safe to share what our deepest parts feel, because there is not that fear of instant rejection. It was kind of sad to hear how bad each of us desired this kind of reationship, yet couldn't brng ourselves to set that accountability up.
Good stuff!
Jan, Judy, Sharla, Kendra, Carol, Robin, and Julie all from Topeka, KS.
Beth, our group could not seem to get together for this meeting, but I thought I would go ahead and leave a comment with my personal answers:
1. emotion: feeling bad about myself
thought: "I'm not good enough, I was supposed to be better than this...something is wrong with me, I'm not ok."
action: frustrated. Being snappy and critical towards others, and isolating myself. (ugh, this is soooo ugly of me, but its the ripe fruit of my destructive thinking)
I really get the thinking with your feelings concept. My example: Just because we don't feel God's presence constantly doesn't mean we should think He's not there. He says He always is. So who's the liar when I feel that way? God or my feelings? Obviously the latter. But if I don't know that He is there irregardless of how I feel then I won't pray, which is sin, and it all started with a faulty feeling.
2. My one defining circumstance that I have been battling most of my life would be the issue of self-worth and value. So many of my other issues flow from right here: deep insecurities; shaky confidence; low self-esteem; social apprehension; and even at one point mild depression.
3. My most recurrent conviciton has been pride...focus on me, myself, and I. This has been a very hard realization to come to, its so ugly. This Bible study has been kicking my tail all summer long:) I am working on trying to think God's thoughts above mine, and putting Him above me.
4. I am sad to say that I don't have a consistent accountability partner. I have several people I see and talk to off and on but nothing like what you are talking about here. I need this. I guess some of the reasons why I don't have this is probably the formerly mentioned pride I deal with: being afraid of what they will think of me, or that maybe I will be "too much" for them. Also, that they may take advantage of me or push me away.
Katie Taylor
Phil Campbell, AL
Group consists of 10 college age women
Lori flying solo and I'm just going to answer the first question as it was fairly profound for me. In September I began a specific journey of transformation when it came to thinking with my feelings. 1.5 years earlier I had been diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. I began a regimine that included a total of 15 medications including chemo to treat the severity of the disease I presented with. My husband left me upon diagnosis. You can imagine all the things Satan was shouting at me in my thought closet. After about 1.5 years I honestly was ready to give up this life BUT after viewing healing videos and testimonies and soaking myself in the Word I began to see the lies...Not only that I absolutly lived in my pain, dwelled there and unfortunantly I could say I thrived there, I allowed it to define me. I decided to believe Gods Word, even though every thing in me felt ugly, damaged, and unloved beyond repair. I started to speak to my mountains, of illness, fatigue, pain, despair, etc., and literally sometimes twice in a minute I would address my "feelings" quoting scripture. I chose to not get wrought up in anxiety but rather wrought up in Christ crucified and what He provided for me on the cross 2,000 years ago. Those actions manifested my healing. I am now disease and symptom free AND finding that God does indeed renew our youth and strenght like the eagles. If I had kept giving heed to my "feelings" I don't believe I would have acquired healing. Instead of a woman scorned I truly feel loved, covered, and provided for in a very special way. To Jesus be the glory...AMEN!
Karen, Sue, and Susan St Joseph, MO
Last week was Vacation Bible School at our church, so we altered our schedule.
Each of us can identify with emotions moving to thoughts moving to action. We all speak move often than not from our emotions.
Each of us has experienced our own trauma thas created a load of other issues. For one of this group it has been a safe place to learn to share her own story.
This question ask by this group;
How well does ducktape work to help control flapping lips?
Each of us are accountable to others in our lives. It has been great to be accountable to another woman in doing this study.
I am finishing another study but I watched the last video on Me Myself and Lies about accountability. It is
sad to say that I do not have anyone I feel I can talk to about things on a daily basis. I am single w/o children.
Married people tend to hang together.People who are sinlge again usually have children in their background. I am
different for them to relate to socially. It is not that they are not polite but I am
not usually included in adult activities,despite being their age,unless I
initiate them.
I confided in one person. I heard what I talked about at work the next day.This person understands according to their job what they can and can't talk about. When it comes to socially it you are just talking if you don't say
this is confidential it is fair game. If you say it is confidential then they get
bent out of shape "I know what is confidential". When you point out what they have done before they say 'I only told.. they won't tell anyone'.How is the 3rd person supposed to know it was confidential in the first place? It is doubtful they are told and this person wonders why I do not tell them things!
I confided in a church officer whose job it was to keep confidences. I heard what I talked about spoken about-it was in general terms but it was me. It
was nothing big and scary just personal. If I had been asked first it would have
been alright but I was not.
Other people find people at the same church to keep their confidences but so
far it has not worked for me.
The Wagnolia Siestas have finally met for Gathering Three. We had to wait for the VBS Boomerang Express Train to leave the station.
We had a sweet time of honesty and truth and appreciating the depth of our friendships. We discussed how our emotions ride upon our hormones so often and are not reliable meters of truth.
Several of our defining moments stem back to our childhood and the effect of our parents. We discussed what that means now that we are parents, too.
Accountability, that was a tough one. We are raw and sore and we've all been betrayed in the past. We find it hard to be accountable in total honesty. We think perhaps it's easier to have an accountability partner who lives far away and wouldn't be tempted to "spill the beans." We need to grow to a place where we can trust God to take care of us regardless if the accountability partner lets us down. Aren't we instructed to be "wise as a serpent?" Accountability is no light matter. We must be very wise in this regard adn not just jump in any old way.
Thank you ladies for all the work you're doing!
This is an update for the DOZ in Clare, Mi. This gathering was especially difficult for us. We met at our church and then went through our study. Apparently we all have a lot of issues that have shaped our lives and it was kind of difficult to share this week. We had some very funny stories down to some very emotional stories about how our emotions lead to actions that are not very healthy. This bible study has really been such a blessing to our group and has really opened up some doors (besides of our thought closets) and has rekindled some friendships that had been waning and introduced some friendships that had never been there. Thanks again! We love our sweet Siesta Mama!
Finally! We're a week and a couple of days late, but we got our discussion in. Busy summers and long distance discussion make it tricky, but it's so worth it!
We are accountability partners so it was good to affirm that relationship and its benefits in our lives. We discussed how we are pretty good at speaking truth to ourselves, but we still struggle with acting on that truth! Such a good study!
Kay, Sierra Vista, Az
Kim, Mabank, TX
We are late! Because of vacation we met this past Tuesday, on July 28th. Out of 15 of us only 6 could make it. No matter how many come though we always have a great time in the Word.
Question 1) We all were able to track our emotions to thoughts to actions. It never ceases to amaze me but no matter how different we are the more we are the same. (If you know what I mean.) This truly made us more aware of how we react to things. I think Vicki put it best when she said this exercise has been like "the Spirit of God taming you like a lion tamer!"
We are all making concerted efforts in changing our reactions to certain situations. It was fun to share the stories.
2) We all love the story of the "Woman with the blood issue". We love how bold she was with her faith in reaching out to touch his garment even though she was "unclean". We all agree that there is one crack in the dam that starts the flood! Most of us had insecurities as the "crack".
3) When we talked about our sin and what we say to ourselves, that was hard. We all know we have sin in our lives. One example was gossip. We know it is wrong and yet at times we make excuses for it. It is unacceptable and we must treat it as such.
4) Some of the Woman have had an accountability partner in the past. Vicky and Renata are sisters who have each other to keep themselves in check. I love to watch them praise and worship. They are two women who are faithful to God and are a blessing to those who know them. Suzanne has also had a woman at Church who she looked to at times, however, like the rest of us sometimes that need for confidentiality keeps us from sharing our needs.
We also had an interesting discussion that Sylvia brought up about sometimes what we "want" is not what God has planned for us. We spoke about praying to God to change our "wants".
There were 3 of 8 of our group present. We met on Tuesday, Jul 28th. due to a pressing Church function the previous Tuesday. We thoroughly enjoyed the small group conversation and let the Holy Spirit led us through the 4 questions Beth had us converse. Admittedly, they were tough ones, but issues that we needed, that's for sure. One thing that we spent a lof of time discussing, was that was profound, is the Three Rs to wisdom: Request it, Revere God, and Receive counsel. Thank you so much for having this summer Bible Study!!! Love you so much, Beth!
Ninette G
Seagoville, Tx
What an amazing study! Our group of moms is really opening up and bonding through this discussion. 2 of us have marriages in crisis and are realizing truths about ourselves - not just the programmed thoughts - but real, biblical truths to give us strength to get through this challenging time.
3 of us identified that abandonment of our fathers while children/teenagers is a defining circumstance that affects several aspects of our lives. It is hard to move past the feelings of worthlessness and blame and anger.
League City, TX Ladies
Our group meets every Sunday afternoon, so we did Session 3 on July 12 and Session 4 on the 19th. We go through our homework, then watch the video, then go through Jennifer's questions.
For Session 4 I had 4 ladies take one day each and lead the discussion of that homework (I started with Day 1). This invited deeper participation and didn't overstress anyone, including me! So we had teaching and equipping along with the fruit of the study. Loved hearing from different perspectives and had lots of sharing. We have anywhere from 18-22 ladies each week.
I will be out the next 2 Sundays on mission in Southeast Asia so one of the precious young wives whose husband will be in ministry one day will coordinate while I am gone.
Beth,
I'm about to catch up as I've just completed Week 4 and beginning Week 5. I've been traveling with my daughter's sports team and it leaves small intervals for Bible study. However, my mind does have time to dwell on what I've studied and I pray constantly. This study has been particularly great for clearing my thoughts of the lies fed to me by my older sister growing up ... making fun of me, her words were always truth, belittling me, etc. Although, I've sought wonderful Christian counseling in the past over these issues, this study is a blessed reminder to guard our thoughts against haunting untruths and old patterns of thought when we aren't paying attention. Beth, I'm praying for you too, as you continue to work through your personal struggles. The enemy never sleeps, but our Savior doesn't either!! He is mighty and his victorious right hand is ready to protect, deliver and secure us. He is bigger than any untruth the enemy throws in our mind.
Sending my love and prayers.
It is often a mistake to think with our feelings because it causes us to have faulty assumptions and inaccurate thoughts and thus our resulting actions become incorrect. Also, when we think with our emotions, we do not always receive messages as others intend. Thinking with emotions causes us to strike out or to freeze and shut down. It is okay to think with our emotions (such as joy, compassion, empathy) when we are being obedient to God.
Our defining circumstances help to make us the people we are, but the journey is sometimes painful. The blood issue of the women gave her the opportunity to have - and exercise - her faith. She was being refined by God. Too often we fail to turn our issues over to God and act on our faith.
Grace United Methodist Church
St. Augustine, Florida
24 women enrolled!
Our group has been so blessed by this study! We met a week late due to summer schedules this time.
We had some great discussion on the discussion points and the accountability partner challenge was huge! When we talked about how isolating yourself can be destructive, it only reinforced how important accountability partners are for us women! I pray that each of us in our group find that accountability.
I haven't left a post yet as we were out of town. But I have kept up with the study. We are almost ready for the last one! I found these questions difficult to answer without a discussion group (and I am on my own). The accountability question struck me hard as I really don't have anyone. There are a handful of women that I go to as I value their wisdom, but not as an accountability partner. It's not that I haven't tried-it just doesn't happen.
Jennifer's statement on pg.87 about being more aware of our weaknesses than Satan were already underlined and starred before Beth mentioned them.
This study has really been a blesssing. As I have progressed in it, I keep thinking of more people I could have asked and kick myself for not thinking of them sooner. The ones I initially asked, never got started. Oh well maybe next summer I''ll have a better memory!
I finally met with Jeni on Friday. I was on vacation with my family the week before and earlier that week. We once again established that I have extremely low self-confidence. So low in fact it barely exists! And because of that I am extremely insecure in public situations. I really would love to just lock myself up in my home for the rest of my life and never have to face the world, but my family won't let me, plus I get extremely depressed when I'm not around people for long periods of time, so I get out anyway, and make a complete fool of myself. Both Jeni and I have been involved in recovery on some level, so we have both dealt with the issue of not wanting accountability in our lives through that. She came face to face with the need for accountability through ministering to people in prison and I ended up recovery because I needed to be in recovery and finally got to a point where I was more afraid of myself and what I was obviously capable of then I was of being accountable to someone who could use that information against me. Anyway, we had a great meeting. I absolutely love Jeni and we haven't known each other that long. But the more I get to know her the more I love her. I hope the feeling is mutual.
Our Hopefully Devoted blog group hosted from Almont, MI has felt the effects of summer busyness. We've lost a few along the way and our responses were slower in coming, but we have about nine women who are faithfully working through this study and loving it.
Many of us have noted that we have things in our thought closets that we didn't realize were there - some things that we thought we'd dealt with long ago. We're really working to clean them out once and for all.
Question 1 brought out some great testimonies from our group. God has done some amazing work already!
Heather, Lufkin, TX
Well, I'm 2 weeks late, but wanted to catch up!
1. my emotion - anxiety, my thought - just lost all calm and peaceful thoughts, my action - became violently ill from a med doc gave to help me relax. Realized that wasn't the answer!
I think w/my feelings a lot...anxiety, worry, "I'm right", "this is ridiculous"(I say that one alot when I think I'm right, ha!). I am definitely the slave to my feelings.
2. As a child in the grocery store w/my mom, I heard a little girl say "mom, isn't she pretty" as she walked by me. Then I heard the mom say "not as pretty as you, sweetheard". I know it's silly, but since then, I think I've always struggled with not being "as pretty" or "as thin".
3. Ps. 39:1 is definitely the one for me...I am being convicted through this study to watch what I say and quit thinking it's all about me. I have been repeating Ps.19:14 a lot lately, reminding myself what God wants of me...
4. yes
Oof what a slacker I am with updating this! I just realized as I was watching the new video that I never posted for the old one. Anyway, here are some highlights from our conversations about weeks 3 & 4:
Janelle said: I like when Jennifer said, "We have two choices: Act according to truth or react to our emotions." This will be a struggle for me, but with God's help, I know I can train myself to recognize truth versus a gut reaction. I also really liked the paragraph at the bottom of page 58 where it says,
"A surplus of emotion usually precedes acting without wisdom." AMEN to THAT!"
Heidi said, in response to the story on page 73: This was amazing. I'm one that usually gets caught up in the annoyances around me... like being stuck in traffic or a slow computer or something. Little things like that really TICK ME OFF! But I was reminded again of how I need to take stupid things like that in stride (but after reading this part, I was stuck in traffic yesterday afternoon and wouldn't ya know I didn't learn my lesson. Thanks goodness God gives
us many many many chances!!!)
I adore my siestas & have just LOVED doing this study with them - and with all of you! God Bless -
Crystal
Shippensburg, PA
Sorry to be so late in posting feedback—couldn’t meet earlier due to vacations.
Here are some topics of discussion:
1) Thinking with feelings—Satan wants to keep us all stirred up when we trust our feelings instead of what God’s Word says is true. We become unstable as water, double-minded (James 1:6-8) and walk on unsteady ground, making us more likely to stumble and fall.
2) One defining circumstance—we need to go back and try and find the root causes of what we have internalized as truth. Ecc. 3:3 says there is a time for healing. Several other examples besides woman with blood issues in Scripture of faith leading to healing, i.e Roman centurion in Matt. 8:5-13, Jesus said, Go your way. It will be done just as you believed it would. We need to let Christ in to cleanse us and have the faith He will make us whole.
3) Yes, we liked the game of “I Spy” – we need to see something good in all situations, for God will work everything out for our good (Rom. 8:28). We just need to believe it to be true.
4) Being alert and aware of our adversary, the devil, is critical so we are not caught off guard, overtaken and devoured. I Peter 5:8 says Satan is prowling around like a roaring lion, seeking a weak target. The story of Cain and Abel in Genesis 4:1-16 picture this perfectly as well. God told Cain, If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it. Sin is at the door of our heart, desiring to possess us—crouching on all fours like an animal—we must learn to subdue it by the power of the Holy Spirit within us. We are to be controlled by the Spirit and not our sinful nature (Rom. 8:5-8).
5) Great verses on controlling anger and calming our soul. Psalm 46:10—good word study—to be still is to let body go limp, release control, and acknowledge God’s ways are right. Yield to God and you will yield fruit!
Great lessons, can’t wait to see how Jennifer finishes up the study!
Johnnie, Christy, and Victoria
Wake Forest, NC
We had a light group for our last study time together, vacations are in full swing. But the Lafayette Siesta's that were here had a great night. We watched both your video and Jennifer's. It was great to get her input also.
The one thing that really interested us was the story lines on page 58. We have several newbie bible studiers and it was great for them to see how the story lines affect even present day.
We had one of creative ladies bring homemade (beautiful) frames for each of us in the group. We are going to put our group picture in it, and you never know but one may end up at LPM! (shhhh it's a secret though) It is so great to fellowship with such a wonderful group of ladies.
I think we are all realizing that our thought closets need to be but are not always based on truth.
Last time we meet I handed out little notebooks and Jennifer has included soooo many wonderful scriptures, I have asked them to keep a scripture notebook. I think they are tired of me saying..."Great notebook scripture!" I have promised them that I will not ask to see the notebook though, even though I really want to!
Can't wait until next time.
Thanks again for leading us in the Word this summer!
1. This is a great exercise! One recent example for me has been: Emotion: Discouraged (It's so hard to find a job right now) Thought: (I'll probably not find a job anytime soon) Action: Procrastination (Why even put that much effort in to finding a job right now?) Yes, thinking with our feelings can guide us way off course. We need to remember God is with us and as long as we seek His guidance, He will provide and place us right where we're supposed to be.
2. My one defining moment is when someone had faulty assumptions about me and let me know I was not welcome around their family. I ended up marrying into the family and the wedge between me and this person affects me a great deal. I have prayed about it for years as I am still carrying around a heavy burden over the words the person spoke to me. The other person seemed to immediately get over how they treated me, but it affected me deeply and it still does. I guess I always expected an apology that didn't come and won't come, so I need to let it go. That defining moment has caused me to always feel very uncomfortable around the family as though they still probably have faulty assumptions about me. With God's help, I will prevail.
3. I've been working to stay alert of Satan trying to pull me down and make me feel insecure about things. I tell myself to be alert to any negative thought patterns Satan tries to put in my thought closet.
4. My accountability partner has my best interest at heart. She isn't afraid to tell me my weaknesses or areas that I need to work on. She keeps me on the right path and I thank God for her. Her truth can be hard for me to hear sometimes, but I now she wouldn't ever lead me the wrong way and she gives me scripture to back up her advice for me.
We all agreed: that for us women thinking with our feelings is something we all do and need to be aware of and work so it doesn't control us; to realize as Jennifer says: "feelings should serve and strengthen us, not enslave and deplete us."
There were defining circumstances for some of us. Each one is praying the Lord use it in their lives to mold and shape them in His image for His glory!
It was unanimous for all three of us: worrying about one thing or another is the top weakeness in our lives. We all recognize this and are committed to fortifying this weakness in our lives with the strength of God's word and giving it to the Lord in prayer.
We felt the biggest roadblock to opening up to others is the fear of not being able to express ourselves adequately, appearing "stupid", or just plain pride preventing us from sharing with others.
Becky, Hannah, and Lydia
Choctaw, OK
Doing this solo ~ just finished Weeks 3 & 4. Thankful for this study,
~Amy 7634 (SF Bay Area, CA)
Hi Amanda and Beth:
My two girlfriends and I just finished Week Three of Me, Myself and Lies this morning - January 21, 2010. Are we behind?!! :)
So we didn't exactly stay on schedule, but we are persevering, and God is teaching and blessing us.
Actually, I think the material was so spot on, at least for two of us, that it was almost too much for us to take at the time. Now that a bit of water and a lot of prayer and Scripture has passed through our hearts and minds since, it's time to continue on.
We'll get together to discuss Week Four in two weeks. We think we'll be done by the time the next summer study begins. How perfect is that?!
Next time we meet, we'll try to remember to take our group picture. Is it too late to be added to the slide show? (jk!)
Now to finish up memorizing our 24 verses from 2009... pressing on, even if at a snail's pace.
Lots of love,
Linda in St.Paul
(and Charlene & Carrie in Minneapolis)
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